My mother died of ovarian cancer and my brother and I took care of her for the majority of that time. What happens to all 5 souls in this movie is exactly what happened to my mom, down to the very smallest detail. There isn't a whole lot of variety to what happens. The person progresses from fairly coherent (themselves, if you will) to more and more aloof, then finally, that awful eyes-in-the-back-of-the-head and labored breathing part (the end). I'm a scientist and an observer. I know darn well what the real cause of death for all of these people (including my mother) was... it's called dehydration. There's a point when the person can't eat or drink anymore, and that's when you know they won't last another week. All that labored breathing is for oxygen that a low blood volume (dehydration) can't supply. There has to be better way than starvation. Truthfully, my mom could have done without the last 2 weeks of her life, and so too could these people. Watch this movie and live in reality, just for a moment. Take some time off from those Will Ferrell movies, you know.
8 Reviews
Dying at Grace (2003)
MartinTeller10 January 2012
Like the other King docs, there is no narration, no interviews, no explanatory title cards except at the very beginning. Just the profoundly intimate documenting of people in their private moments... in this case, five terminally ill patients in palliative care at Toronto Grace Hospital. The film is, in a word, devastating. I haven't wept so much in a long time. A couple of the patients seem hopeless from the outset, the others start out fairly vibrant but gradually deteriorate into despair, resignation, and finally barely functional bodies. Although we see them at their most helpless and dependent, at the height of their suffering, the feeling aroused is not pity but heartfelt compassion for them and their loved ones. Most moving of all is Lloyd, whose brain tumor leaves him practically speechless, but the devotion of his lover is deeply affecting. A powerful, shattering piece of work.
An unrelenting and brutally real documentary about death
Jeremy_Urquhart24 March 2021
Most films I rate 4/5 or higher I'd gladly watch again. This, however, is not one of them. It's just unrelentingly brutal in its honesty, with no narration, music, flashbacks, dramatisations, animation... no techniques of any kind you'd find in other documentaries to spice things up and make things more "fun".
That's not to say it's boring exactly. The patients who are dying all have interesting interviews, and seeing their health decline to the point of death - while miserable - is something I haven't really seen depicted before, nor experienced personally, as relatives of mine have either died on the other side of the country, at a very old age and relatively peacefully, or quite suddenly, to the point where there wasn't any deteriorating health to witness.
But while it's engaging, it's also slow and repetitive and not entertaining, but I figured that's intentional. There's an inevitability over the whole proceedings. There's not really meant to be any intrigue or suspense. You get exactly what you expect out of a documentary with this premise, and it's as terrifying and sad as expected.
It earns its long runtime, despite being a touch watch. And the editing is very effective, often being very subtle, but doing a good job at cycling through the five patients and depicting passages of time clearly passing by.
I can't say I recommend this. But it does exactly what it wants to, and if it seems interesting or worthwhile to you, it could be worth a watch, and it can give you as a viewer a true insight into a process that will happen to us all.
But as a warning, there are things you'll see and hear in this that you might never forget. From this day forth until my last, I'll never forget the horrifying sounds of a death rattle, and the audio of which in this documentary disturbed me more than anything else I've seen in a film during 2021 so far.
That's not to say it's boring exactly. The patients who are dying all have interesting interviews, and seeing their health decline to the point of death - while miserable - is something I haven't really seen depicted before, nor experienced personally, as relatives of mine have either died on the other side of the country, at a very old age and relatively peacefully, or quite suddenly, to the point where there wasn't any deteriorating health to witness.
But while it's engaging, it's also slow and repetitive and not entertaining, but I figured that's intentional. There's an inevitability over the whole proceedings. There's not really meant to be any intrigue or suspense. You get exactly what you expect out of a documentary with this premise, and it's as terrifying and sad as expected.
It earns its long runtime, despite being a touch watch. And the editing is very effective, often being very subtle, but doing a good job at cycling through the five patients and depicting passages of time clearly passing by.
I can't say I recommend this. But it does exactly what it wants to, and if it seems interesting or worthwhile to you, it could be worth a watch, and it can give you as a viewer a true insight into a process that will happen to us all.
But as a warning, there are things you'll see and hear in this that you might never forget. From this day forth until my last, I'll never forget the horrifying sounds of a death rattle, and the audio of which in this documentary disturbed me more than anything else I've seen in a film during 2021 so far.
Raw, riveting footage
wisewebwoman16 February 2004
This is the most powerful documentary I have ever seen. To anyone thinking that a deathbed scene is a peaceful serene experience surrounded by loved ones, think again having seen this.
It is haunting, sad and empowering to watch five people (having agreed with the film maker, Allan King, to have their last moments captured for posterity so that others might be enlightened to the death experience)die over the the time frame of a few weeks.
Some of the scenes are almost unwatchable, the terrible sounds of the last few hours of breathing, the sadness (for the viewer) of most of these courageous participants dying alone apart from the camera and sound technicians.
The most beautiful death scene was a gay man, his partner and parents all loving him to "the other side." He had been resigned to death, wanted it, and yet his body struggled to stay alive. I am still haunted by it, still trying to formulate thoughts on how these deaths in the film have affected me as these people were so real and vibrant and even funny.
Brilliant, brave film-making from Allan King whose previous documentaries I have also seen and recommend. 10 out of 10. Some films you see and are never the same again. All films should be like this.
It is haunting, sad and empowering to watch five people (having agreed with the film maker, Allan King, to have their last moments captured for posterity so that others might be enlightened to the death experience)die over the the time frame of a few weeks.
Some of the scenes are almost unwatchable, the terrible sounds of the last few hours of breathing, the sadness (for the viewer) of most of these courageous participants dying alone apart from the camera and sound technicians.
The most beautiful death scene was a gay man, his partner and parents all loving him to "the other side." He had been resigned to death, wanted it, and yet his body struggled to stay alive. I am still haunted by it, still trying to formulate thoughts on how these deaths in the film have affected me as these people were so real and vibrant and even funny.
Brilliant, brave film-making from Allan King whose previous documentaries I have also seen and recommend. 10 out of 10. Some films you see and are never the same again. All films should be like this.
Superb!
elaborate_burn5 April 2004
One of the heaviest films I've ever seen. Also one of the best documentaries. I saw this at the Phoenix Film Festival where it rightfully won Best Foreign Film and thought it was the most moving film I saw there. Completely shows a side of death that cinema usually ignores: banal reality. Five ordinary people die of cancer over the course of 14 weeks in an ordinary hospital. No characters. No interviews. No narration. No redemption. No plot-twists. Slow paced. That's what happens to people who get cancer. This film completely takes the physical and emotional reality and turns it into a cinematic emotional abyss. Really makes you wonder how you will die or if this is an oracle into your future. Absolutely amazing footage. This is no mere snuff film, mind you. This is a film that takes reality and shoves it into your face. All these poor people have is their dignity and even that is taken away. A tragedy even more in that it is reality. Such is life.
Dying at Grace
cma8710 May 2009
Incredible. Heartbreaking. Eye-opening. No words can truly describe the quiet power of this documentary. People die everyday; we watch characters die on television. Yet, do we really know what death is? This film breaks down the wall of facade that films have created. And, as a result, we witness death in as raw and moving a form as possible: an inevitable entity that patiently works. Each individual interviewed - hospital staff, family member, patient - has a vital, sometimes tear-producing, prospective on Life, and answering with the wisdom, confidence and honesty that only years of existence could muster. You feel for each individual's life, and care all the more when you witness one of them slowly wither away. Although sad, the film convinces us as an audience to reflect, perhaps partly on Death. But, it actually has us ask about our own lives. How much have you lived? In what (or whom) do you believe? Who do you love? In all, "Dying at Grace" is a powerful documentary that does not accuse the audience of injustice or possess some political agenda. It is a film of quiet power and honesty, one that can move an audience member to tears and affirm Life, all at once. It asks questions, but it leaves them open, on the table, ready to be answered at some other time when the time is right. Just like Death, the film works gradually, patiently waiting for the audience member to reflect and consider his/her mortality. It is a must-see documentary for any human being.
Truly excellent....
chester-gray15 February 2004
This was a very moving insight the thoughts and feelings of five people during their final few days on this earth. Having very compassionate health care workers to talk to about death and the afterlife. Some moments in the documentary nearly brought me to tears. If you get the chance, watch it, but I do NOT recommend it for young children, as there are some disturbing scenes.
A truth we avoid
darkeyes909019 May 2011
This is a film everyone should see. Particularly if you have someone you care about who is ill and could die. I took care of my partner for 9 months in a hospice and then for 5 yrs. at home. The final days still haunt me. This would have prepared me beyond what reading, or telling me could accomplish. It was difficult to see this film as it so mirrored my own experience at the hospice and to the final days at home. The experience has shown me how terrible it is that we do not provide physician assisted suicide. Instead we put them through this process of dying and suffering through it. Plus unless you are insured, we take away everything you have so you can afford to die. This film serves as a wake up call to the reality of death.
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