The Gamers (2002 Video)

Justin MacGregor: Ambrose, Magellan

Quotes 

• The Gamemaster : Guys, please! I want you to roleplay this. Remember you've never met this guy before, the last guys you met tried to kill you, and you're standing in the ruins of an evil, cursed castle. Just act appropriately.

  Magellan : Hello, I'm Magellan, a traveling mage. I notice your group has no wizard.

  Rogar, the Barbarian : You seem trustworthy. Would you care to join us in our noble quest?

  Magellan : Yes. Yes I would.

• Nimble the Thief : [shocked]  The Shadow?

  Ambrose : [scared]  The Shadow?

  Newmoon the Elf : [resolved]  The Shadow.

• Ambrose : Hey, isn't Mark supposed to be here?

  The Gamemaster : Uh yeah. He's over there.

• Newmoon the Elf : [interrupting the Gamemaster]  Wait, wait, wait! Cross the river? Shouldn't we like... uh... bury him. You know like, give him a proper funeral?

  Nimble the Thief : I agree!

  Ambrose : [rolling up a new character, looking up surprised]  Thanks, guys!

  Rogar, The Barbarian : Yeah, yeah! Dude! We get 15 piety points per level when we bury a party member, and since he was level six...

  Nimble the Thief : That be like 90 points!

  Rogar, The Barbarian : Boohyah!

  Nimble the Thief : Boohyah!

  [Nimble highfives Rogar] 

  Newmoon the Elf : And that'll totally make up for that orphanage we burned down...

• Ambrose : Can you believe he would actually rather go out with a beautiful, intelligent young woman than hang out in this ass smelling basement with his best friends on a Friday night playing adventure games and having belching contests? And all for the off chance he'll sore too! Can you imagine that?

  Nimble the Thief : So... We're in the forest right?

• The Gamemaster : [the party has arrived at a river crossing, all of them looking indifferently at it; at the table there is an awkward silence amongst the players for a few moments]  Dude!

  Ambrose : What?

  The Gamemaster : Aren't you forgetting something?

  Ambrose : [confused]  Like what?

  The Gamemaster : Like your character's paralysing fear of water, perhaps?

  Ambrose : Oh yeah, that's right...

  [Ambrose suddenly grips his head with both hands, screaming his lungs out in horror as he is being dragged away by Rogar and Nimble]