Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Dylan Moran: David
Photos
Quotes
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Liz : Shaun?
Shaun : Yeah?
Liz : You see what I'm saying?
Shaun : Yep, totally.
Liz : I know he's your best friend, but you do live with him.
Shaun : I know.
Liz : It's not that I don't like Ed.
[Liz looks over at Ed who is playing an arcade game]
Liz : Ed, it's not that I don't like you.
Ed : It's all right.
Liz : It would just be nice if we could...
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Fuck!
Liz : ...spend a bit more time together...
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Bollocks!
Liz : ...just the two of us.
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Cock it!
Liz : It's just with Ed here, it's no wonder I always bring my flat-mates out and then that only exacerbates things.
Shaun : What do you mean?
Liz : Well you guys hardly get on, do you?
Shaun : No, what does "exacerbate" mean?
Liz : It means um, to make things worse.
Shaun : Right. Well I mean, it's not that I don't like David and Di.
[Shaun looks over at David and Di at the table next to them]
Shaun : Guys, it's not that I don't like you.
David , Dianne : [together] It's all right.
Shaun : And it's not that I don't want to spend time with you cause I do. It's just... Ed doesn't have too many friends.
Ed : Can I get... any of you cunts... a drink?
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[after Shaun gets shouted at by Liz]
David : Basically, I'd say your nine lives are up, Shaun
Shaun : Get fucked, four eyes! Why don't you go out with her if you love her so much?
David : What do you mean by that?
[storms off]
David : Well, I don't know what he meant by that.
[uncomfortable silence]
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Dianne : I don't think he'd leave us, Davs.
David : Wouldn't he? Lizzy, how can you put your faith in a man you spectacularly binned for being unreliable? A man whose idea of a romantic nightspot and an impenetrable fortress are the same thing? It's... This is a pub! We are in a pub! What are we going to do now?
Ed : We could get a round in.
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David : You still haven't met his mum?
Shaun : Not yet!
Dianne : Don't you get on with your mum, Shaun?
Shaun : It's not that I don't get on with her...
David : Are you ashamed by your mum, Shaun?
Shaun : No! I love my mum!
Ed : I love his mum too.
Shaun : Ed!
Ed : [singing] She's like butter!
Shaun : Ed!
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David : For a hero, you're quite a hypocrite!
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Liz , Declan : [as each survivor passes by their parallel counterpart] Hi.
David , Mark : [formally] Hello.
Dianne , Maggie : [friendly] Hi!
Barbara , Yvonne's Mum : [politely] Hello.
Ed , Cousin Tom : [too involved with their cell phones, briefly glancing at each other, muttering] Hello.
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Liz : [during a standoff where David wants to shoot Shaun's Mum Barbara before she turns] Please, can we just stop and think about this?
Shaun : Tell him to put the gun down!
David : Look, Lizzie, she's gonna change. You know I'm right. And when she does, she'll come back, and she'll kill *all* of us. That's what your *ex* can't seem to realize.
Shaun : THAT'S what this is about, isn't it? It's just... it's just he doesn't like me! He's always hated me, and now he wants to shoot my mum!
David : She's not...!
Shaun : You never thought I deserved her, or that I was good enough!
David : What are you talking about?
Shaun : Oh, come on, we all know you're in love with Liz!
David : That is not true!
Shaun : Yes it is!
David : [refusing to make eye contact with Shaun] That is not true...
Dianne : Yes, it is...
David : What?
Dianne : I know you only hung out with me at college to get close to Liz, and when she knocked you back, I was there to pick up the pieces. I have come to terms with that, Daffs. Why can't you?
David : Lizzie. I want you to know that my feelings for you have always been essentially...
Liz : [flabbergasted] David, please! There are slightly more pressing matters at hand here!