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You know that brown stuff that drops out of your anus...
Mmyers200330 January 2004
...well this sitcom is something that very much resembles brown stuff. I've never had to witness anything quite as terrible and unfunny as this. I've seen car crashes that look less painful and more funny than this. Amanda Holden and Jamie whats-his-name aren't exactly the worlds greatest comic talents. And the other actors involved aren't very good either. I'm even writing this review whilst watching it and its not getting any better.

If you ever get a really aching tooth and need to pull it out, watch this at the same time, that way you won't feel any pain.

If not, don't watch this at all.
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A Sit-Com Where The H is silent
Theo Robertson10 April 2004
There`s not much left to say involving the BBC`s much hyped comedy MAD ABOUT ALICE so perhaps I should have the last word .

As everyone has mentioned the opening credits involve a song sung by someone who cannot sing and it`s no shock to discover the person singing it is an actress who can`t act either . In fact no one acting in this series seems to be able to act but that wasn`t what yanked my chain , what really annoyed me more than anything are the muppets in the audience who urinate themselves with laughter at the events on screen . For example in a scene Jamie Theakston ( I don`t know what his character`s name is but Theakston even has a problem playing himself ) is cutting his toenails and whoops of laughter are heard . A toe nail flys across the screen and the stench of urine comes wafting from the audience who are wetting themselves laughing

I fail to see what`s funny and if I remember correctly the last series of I`M ALAN PARTRIDGE also suffered heavily from an intrusive laughter track . So stop drowning us with laughter Mr BBC comedy producers . We are not amused
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Comedy?
000Mark00024 January 2004
Oh Lord please help me! Since having watched this programme I haven't stopped laughing.

Quite heavily trailed on the BBC prior to broadcast. Prime-time position in the Friday night schedule, sandwiched between 'EastEnders', the BBC's top-rated prime soap opera, and a re-run of 'Only Fools and Horses', one of the BBC's most highly rated and watched comedies of all time.

Good Casting. Fantastic performances. Well-structured and clever jokes. Pinpoint comic timing. All of these were sadly lacking. Jamie Theakston- former TV presenter, bondage practitioner and prostitute frequenter (according to the tabloid press) stars along-side former bed-hopping trollop (according to the tabloid press, not me, I've met her and she seemed quite nice) Amanda Holden. The two exhibit all the chemistry of an empty test-tube in a vacuum at absolute zero! If you want to see something far more entertaining and funny starring these two, may I suggest.... err.... The Tabloid Press! The gags were weak and laboured (and when I say 'gags', I believe that was the intention but sadly not the reality!), and poor timing (That's just 'poor timing' and not 'poor comic timing', as there is nothing comic about this programme. The poor timing I refer to is that this programme would better have been broadcast during a period of major transmitter maintenance or a power blackout and not at peak time on a Friday evening.)

Top Tip for whoever commissioned this programme - when commissioning a 'comedy' it is always a good idea to ensure that the said 'comedy' is funny. In the event that the said 'comedy' is not funny, it is by definition not a 'comedy' - q.v. 'Mad About Alice'.

So why have I not stopped laughing since I watched this programme. Quite simple really. I never started!

As an alternative to this programme, you may like to take a trip to your local DIY store, purchase a large tin of emulsion, apply liberally to a surface within your domicile residence, focus upon said surface until such time that the liberally applied emulsion coating is no longer in a liquid state.

Absolutely no stars. 0/10. 0%. And for the benefit of our European viewers, nul points!
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Oh deary,deary me...
wellthatswhatithinkanyway27 February 2004
STAR RATING:*****Unmissable****Very Good***Okay**You Could Go Out For A Meal Instead*Avoid At All Costs

It would seem that Friday night comedy on the BBC is in a pretty dire state at the moment,after both series of the dreadful All About Me,the execrable Eyes Down and now this misfiring effort.

The premise follows the exploits of the titular Alice (Amanda Holden) following her separation from husband Doug (Jamie Theakston) as they struggle to attempt to reconcile and bring up their young son.

If AAM's opening song is rather schmaltzy and annoying,then Mad About Alice has an opening theme song that multiples those problems tenfold.The two leading stars (John Cleese and Prunella Scales they ain't) apparently seem to be churning out a chringe-worthy,just plain awful melody to even tackier caricatures of themselves prancing around in half real-life/caricatures of themselves,which will make you herald back to the days when Chuck Norris thought he could croon along to the tune of his Walker:Texas Ranger show's opening theme.

As for the script (which so many other people seem to have been complaining about),I'll be as fair to it as I can and say that it does at least attempt to sound impressive,with lines like ("Mom,I've got a lot on my plate right now." "Jake,you're ten.The only thing you've got on your plate is fish fingers") here and there.The trouble is,it's a comedy series.....and it just isn't funny.None of it.Not even faintly.In fact,the more it tries and tries to be mind-blowingly hilarious,the more it just seems to end up sucking more co*k than both Elton John and Will Young combined.

The final series aired tonight,with (possible spoiler) Alice finalising her divorce and celebrating the engagement of one of her friends.Somehow,I don't think we'll be following her adventures any further than that.

Oh well,that's another season of Only Fools and Horses repeats on the way then.*
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Mad about alice? WELL I'M NOT!!!
unknown27021 February 2004
This has to be one of the most lamest and boring sitcoms on T.v. It is comedy but is devoid of humor. It is a woman who is seeing her husband again for the sake of her child(well something like that anyway). The characters are Alice who is working and living with her son, and Doug who is doctor who is Alice's husband. The supporting characters are Alice's boyfriend,Alice's friend who is school teacher and a psycothic eight year old. I know that I haven't got a very detailed plot summary and character description but improving it means watching the show(I can't do that because the show is so bad) The reason why people were watching this was because of the press reviews in the t.v mags. Maybe these were done to get people to watch in the hope of it getting viewing figures. Debra Stephonson who is also in this just seems to be there for the hell of it, and the psycothic child isn't funny either( it makes it seem as though whover wrote this thinks that people who have got a terrible illness is funny). I found myself reading a magazine when I was watching the first episode and parents were watching it and took the t.v off half way through. Bottom line is, Don't watch this it's horrible

P.s The last episode will be show next Friday. That a relief to let you know that it's ending
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Absolute Rubbish
cremonese6423 January 2004
Not so long ago, the BBC were churning out Quality Sitcoms such as The Vicar of Dibley, One Foot in the Grave and even My Family. But now, they have been filling the 8:30 on Friday slot with increasingly dire Sitcoms. Now we have this garbage. The subject Matter ruins it from the get go. A Woman (Amanda Holden), separated from her Ex (Theakston), gets together with him for the sake of their kid. Where does it go from here? All we are supposed to want them to do is eventually get together. And then What? Its gone down a dead end. Its simply a rehash of the Ross/Rachel thing from Friends, and fleshed out into a Full show. Holden is Good Looking, but isn't a very good actress. Even the adverts began with Amanda Holden in...That's always a bad start with a new show. The programme is what makes it great, not the actors. Theakston is terrible, The kids are ridiculously annoying and There are the same terrible cliched jokes we've heard hundreds of times before on superior shows. Is there a studio audience? Or did they record the Hysteria Ward of a hospital? The direction is poor, too and its oh so sad to see John Gordon Sinclair strutting his stuff alongside lesser Thespians, and on a very poor stage. I doubt this rubbish will be recommisioned.
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