Diamond Zero (2005) User Reviews

Interesting premise

[tomsharp294 · 10 December 2004]

I got a hold of a screener for this film and was expecting a stupid silly movie and okay it was stupid and it was silly but I couldn't stop thinking about the premise of making celebrities into diamonds.

You know someone's going to start doing this stuff for real.

Bronson Pinchot was really funny too and his jailbreak scene has got to go down as one of the most original ways to escape from "the man" ever. Prison guards all over be warned. I laughed so hard I almost--- well--- when you see it you'll know what I mean.

I love to see a movie that doesn't take itself too seriously but makes you think a little too.

Awesome, simply awesome

[raymondfiore · 9/10 · 5 February 2005]

This was absolutely the best independent film I saw this year. I went to sundance and saw some great films, but this one kicked their butt. Annelie and David -- kudos to you. You managed to make a film with a social commentary and keep me from falling on my face from boredom at the same time. Hollywood look out, this one touches a little too close to home. Disney and company will get their just desserts if this ever sees the light of day. I have just one question -- WAS IT REAL -- I sat next to one of the grips tonight and hes swears it was. Say it wasn't so Bronson, say it wasn't so. One more thing, Leo Rossi is one of the most under-rated actors ever, more so than Kevin Bacon, that guy has real talent. I give the whole cast a hats off for doing a film like this one. One last time - say it isn't so Bronson!

outstanding

[vera_drake · 9/10 · 5 February 2005]

There was a screening last night and I just thought this was such a cute movie. What a concept. I want to make myself into a diamond. I haven't seen Bronson Pinchot in anything for years (I think he's been doing a lot of theater on Broadway from what I've heard) and was really impressed by his performance as well as that of Tippi Hedren. I was really shocked to see what a low rating IMDb gave this movie. I have a suspicion that one scene in particular offended a lot of people, but all I can say is get a sense of humor folks. I can't wait to see what these guys do next and I'm also going to check out the director's first movie as well. You guys are a bunch of nuts!

This movie includes the SEX BOMB JOAN VAN ARK!!

[Knotslanding1993 · 10/10 · 23 December 2013]

This movie includes the SEX BOMB JOAN VAN ARK!!

All I remember about this movie is that the SEXY Joan Van Ark is in it wearing sexy clothing!! This movie is about two guys looking for diamonds or something, whatever!! Anyway, Joan Van Ark is in the movie and in the first scene she is drunk or just crazy and in a bar wearing a sexy see through top, black bra and hot, tight black pants. The bar is dark though so you can't fully see her hot body in the see through shirt! I had to turn up the brightness and lightness on my TV settings to the highest, but I still couldn't see to the fullest! Arrest lighting people, stupid cows! Joan acts drunk in the best acting I've seen in my life! This woman is just beyond a super hero!!! She falls down drunk in the club with her lip gloss and her top flies up to show her HOT stomach! Keep in mind, she was in her late 50s or early 60s in this, she is a ageless superhero!! The guy tries to pick her up, but drops her again and her shirt flies up again (thank you god)! Then they take her home and she says her gate is locked and the sexy idiot left her keys on the other side of the gate or something, so get ready, the sex machine tries to climb over the gate complete with amazing wardrobe malfunctions again! Then it cuts to her waking up in bed with one of the guys! She gets up out of bed and sits up on the side of the bed and shows her total naked back (it was heaven) and then puts a robe on, there is also some side boob showing!! I couldn't relax after watching this movie! It's better than dirty magazines!!! One missed opportunity though! They didn't show the whole sex scene, just her waking up after sex, once again arrest all crew involved! My god every writer, producer, director, lighting person, etc. should be in a mental institution! If you get Joan Van Ark, the hottest women ever to exist and that ever will exist to star in your movie, you better use her hotness to the fullest and not blow it and let the whole world down! They are crushing dreams here and wrecking lives! Bird butts!!