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Neophytes and Neon Lights (2001)
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Overview
Plot:
In a world where teleportation has replaced air travel, 5 unemployed people try to survive in Sydney's underground. | add synopsisUser Comments:
quit your job, be a vandal, go on a rampage, do anything but please don't watch this... moreCast
(Cast overview, first billed only) | Sam O'Dell | ... | Turner |
| Morgan O'Neill | ... | Astro |
| Malina Hamilton-Smith | ... | Shade |
 | Matt Doran | ... | Sedge |
 | Nadia Townsend | ... | Atari |
| Alan Cinis | ... | Fagan |
| John Schwarz | ... | Steven |
| Darren Mapes | ... | Rick |
| Brian Roberts | ... | Kevin |
| Ripley Hood | ... | Sean |
| Matthew Foster | ... | Brett |
| Cass Cumerford | ... | Sam |
 | Jai Koutrae | ... | Luggage Officer |
| Paul Lum | ... | Macca |
 | Rhett Giles | ... | Cop 1 |
Additional Details
Parents Guide:
Add content advisory for parentsRuntime:
90 minCountry:
AustraliaLanguage:
EnglishColor:
ColorMOVIEmeter: 
54% since last week
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Related Links
| Full cast and crew | IMDb Australia section | Add this title to MyMovies |
If you enjoy terrible acting, shallow character development, uninteresting camera work, extremely slow movies in excess of sixty minutes, or fruitless plots with very little to make sitting through them pay off, then feel free to waste your time hunting down this 'rare gem!' Honestly, I don't ever recall having seen a film that couldn't render one quotable line, one simple laugh, or one moment of passable acting, but this movie takes the cake. The script is so bad that I am surprised someone spent the money to print enough for the cast. I understand this movie is quite difficult to get a hold of. Good. It would be nice if some rich guy worked to keep it that way.
I have heard that Australian film and television were notoriously bad, but this is an understatement; I would not even recommend this movie to my worst enemy, my idiot boss, or the guys I hired to move my house that tried to rip me off. I would normally describe the plot in this section of a review, but I am so disgusted that I do not feel like mustering the necessary enthusiasm to do so. If I truly believe that sitting through this stinky bomb was a waste of time, then recounting it here is pointless. Don't believe me? Then watch it. Go ahead... make my day. But when you're out there on the ledge thinking about gravity, just remember that someone warned you not to watch Neophites & Neon Lights...