Dog Soldiers (2002)

Sean Pertwee: Wells

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sergeant Harry Wells : We are now up against live, hostile targets. So, if Little Red Riding Hood should show up with a bazooka and a bad attitude, I expect you to chin the bitch.

• [Cooper tries to push Wells' intestines back into his stomach] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : My guts are out Coop!

  Cooper : We'll just put 'em back in then!

  Sergeant Harry Wells : They're not gonna fucking fit!

  Cooper : Of course they'll fit, man!

• Cooper : Werewolves spend most of their time in human form, right? And the only people for miles around live right here.

  Spoon : So these things aren't about to give up the fight and go home...

  Cooper : They ARE home.

  Sgt. Harry Wells : Yeah, that makes perfect sense. I mean, think about it. We bust into their house, we eat all their porridge, we sleep in their fucking beds. No wonder they're pissed.

• [Cooper is trying to stitch up Wells's wounds] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : Cooper, knock me out. HIT ME.

  [Cooper hits him] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : I said knock me out, you fuckin' pussy.

• [Seeing his own intestines hanging out] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : Sausages.

• Wells : If we do happen to make contact, I expect nothing less than gratuitous violence from the lot of ya. Because we're firing blanks doesn't mean we have to be thinking nice thoughts. So you remember, you keep the fire down, right, you get stuck in and you kick their fucking teeth out, or I guarantee you, Joe, they will be eating your bollocks for breakfast, sunshine.

  Terry : Hard-boiled or fried, Sarge?

  Wells : Scrambled.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : I just didn't make it out this time, that's all. When I signed my life away on that dotted line, I fucking meant it. I am a *professional soldier*.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : I am not breaking radio silence just cos' you lot got spooked by a dead flying fucking cow.

• Terry : Planning on scoring, Sarge?

  Spoon : Yea, well mind you don't foul her in the penalty box.

  Terry : Aww.

  Wells : Alright, button it, Private Parts.

• Cooper : [quote is a reference to The Matrix]  Where's Spoon?

  Sergeant Harry Wells : There is no Spoon.

• Spoon : So this bloke walks into a pub right, with a little dog under his arm. Puts it down on the bar, goes and sits down. The bar-tender's lookin' at him thinking "what the fuckin' hell's goin' on here?". Then he looks back at the dog, and to his surprise the dog turns around and...

  [Dead cow drops into camp] 

  Cooper : Fuckin' cow.

  Spoon : Fuckin' hell.

  [Terry fires at it] 

  Wells : Cease fire, Terry. Cease fire.

  Joe : Terry, what the hell are you doin'? You're firing blanks man.

  Wells : Is everyone all right? Is everyone OK?

  Spoon : Nah, man, I think I've shit meself.

• [Wells cocks his gun] 

  Wells : Yeah, well, this gives me better piece of mind, sir.

  Ryan : You want piece of mind? Run for your lives before they tear your legs from under you.

  Wells : Now you just shut up like a good gentleman. You are scaring my lads.

• [indicating his rapidly healed stomach wound] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : You cannot tell me that is fucking normal.

• Ryan : They won't die.

  Wells : Yeah, well,

  [cocks gun] 

  Wells : , this gives me better peace of mind, sir.

  Ryan : You want piece of mind? Run before they tear your legs from under you.

  Wells : Now you just shut up like a good gentleman, you are scaring my lads.

• [Joe watching the cow roasting on the fire] 

  Joe : Is anyone else thinking what I'm thinking?

  Bruce : You are joking aren't you?

  Spoon : You fuckin' animal.

  Joe : Yea, you're all thinking the same thing aren't you?

  Spoon : Mmmm.

  Joe : Right lads, how do ya like your steak done?

  Wells : You bunch of dirty bloody savages. You lot make me sick. God.

• [Wells trapped in the toilet by attacking werewolves] 

  Cooper : Sarge. Sarge?

  Sergeant Harry Wells : I'M IN THE KHAZI.

• Wells : [Wells is drunk while Megan and Cooper proceed to care for his wound] 

  [about Cooper] 

  Wells : I tell you what, I love him. I love you! Like the mate that I... that I love.

  Megan : Would you like to be alone?

• Wells : Come on, sunshine, fucking shift it!

• Sergeant Harry Wells : [referring to the possibility that he is now a werewolf]  With Ryan it onlt took a couple of hours mate. It's a full moon. I don't know, maybe it's like when you need to take a piss or something, I don't know. When you gotta go, you gotta fucking go.

  Cooper : Yea, well maybe it's more like needing a shite. Just cos you need one doesn't mean you drop your kegs and pinch one off. Anyway, fuck Ryan. Shifty bastard could've been one of those things from the start.

• [Drunk, having been given whiskey as a pain killer] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : Absolutely fucking top fucking bollocks!

• Sergeant Harry Wells : Shiv the cunt!

• Cooper : You all right?

  Sergeant Harry Wells : Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm peachy, mate.

• Wells : All right, then, time sync. I got zero-seven-thirty coming up in three... two... one... check.

  Spoon : Oh, bollocks, I don't believe this.

  Wells : What is it now, Witherspoon?

  Spoon : Left me watch at the barracks, Sarge.

  Wells : Take a breather every once in a while, son, you'll live longer.

  Terry : Nice work, Spoon, you tosser.

  Joe : Took the words right out of my mouth.

  Spoon : And you'll be taking my boot out your mouth in a minute, Joe, you baldy twat.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : Now listen up, I wanna make this quick, and to the point, 'cos just like you all I want to do is get home, jump into a warm bed with a nice hot woman and watch the footy.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : Open your mouth, watch your ears, mind your toes!

• [to Ryan who has just unveiled that he had used Wells' unit as bait to capture a werewolf] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : [Hits him]  They were MY men!

  Cooper : Get up you shit. You know what we can do. Give us a fightin' chance!

• Joe : Over here Cooper. On me head.

  [Cooper kicks Joe's helmet to him and whacks his head] 

  Joe : Ya twater. Can't believe I'm missin' the footy for this... party.

  Wells : Joe, if you don't shut up I swear to God I'm gonna fuckin' slot you myself, now move.

  Joe : Didn't say a word, Sarge.

• [Upon landing in the chopper] 

  Wells : I want a good, clean dispersal. I want a secure landing-zone. Go go go go go. Joe, get outta the pissin' chopper.

  Joe : I'm not missing the footy for this. It's totally bone. I'm not goin', Sarge. I'm not goin'.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : [drunk]  Is it your birthday, Coop?

  Cooper : No, mate.

  Sergeant Harry Wells : Is it my birthday? Hey, hey!

• Megan : I'm sorry. When I found you out there tonight I truly believed you were the best chance I had of getting out. But now we have no chance. There is no out there never was. I came here to be at one with nature when I got what I wanted... . now I have to live with it.

  Cooper : There's no house in the next glen.

  Megan : No.

  Cooper : And there were no werewolves in the barn when it blew.

  Megan : Not one.

  Cooper : And the reason you're not in the photograph is because you took it.

  Megan : I never meant to..

  Cooper : [interrupts her]  you women. Same old shit.

  Megan : Being nice to women will get you nowhere Cooper. Being nice to me will get you killed. You may think they're all bitches but... I'm the real thing.

  [she starts to transform but she painfully represses it] 

  Megan : Do you think I like being part of this fucked up family? You think I chose to run with the pack? No. I chose you. But now you're out of luck, and I'm out of time, and all we can do is let nature take its course. They were always here. I just unlocked the door. It's that time of the month.

  [Werewolves appear behind her, she lifts her face up hissing with her fangs as her eyes glow yellow] 

  Sergeant Harry Wells : [Wells shoots Megan in the face causing her fall to backwards]  Somebody had to put her out of her misery.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : Probably some joker who didn't want Joe to hear the footy results.

  Joe : Laugh? I nearly shat.

• [Using a lighter and deodorant bottle as a flame-thrower] 

  Wells : Yea, get out of it you bastard. How'd you like them tomatoes, you fuckin' bastard?

• Wells : [to Cooper upon failing Special Ops]  Listen, the only people who go looking for trouble are Kamikazes, glory boys and full-on fucking fuckwits.

• Cooper : [after Wells has had his intestines exposed]  How are you feeling?

  Wells : A touch of gas. And the fact that various body parts are trying to vacate the premises, fucking awful.

• Wells : [Cooper is aiding the wounded Wells upstairs to 'patch up' his wound]  C'mon, Coop, up the wooden hill.

• Wells : [Ryan has just turned into a werewolf and Wells grabs a stick and throws it]  Fetch!

• Wells : What if shes wrong? What if they're not all in there?

  Cooper : Then we get some of them. Its a shit load better than none of them and a marked improvement on all of us.

• Wells : You know, Coop, there's one more thing you gotta learn about command, mate. Sometimes the people that you kill, are your own men.

• Sergeant Harry Wells : [finishing the 'Eddie Oswald' story]  So you could say that Eddie was right, Satan did indeed save his skin, just not all of it. Or you could say that Eddie was just unlucky. Either way, it taught me to keep a very open mind. Boom. Boom.

• Wells : [to Cooper]  Listen to me, you have got to make it out alive. It happened. Prove it happened!