Fatty Drives the Bus (1999)

Mark Sutton: Martin

Quotes 

• Molly : [outside Wrigley Field]  Do they play baseball here?

  Satan : Yes.

  Sam : Can I go on the field today?

  Satan : I'm sorry, no.

  Lana : What year was it built?

  Satan : Uh, 19

  [mumble mumble] 

  Satan : .

  Bud : Is there a bathroom here?

  Satan : Around the corner to the left - watch your butt.

  Martin : Is there a game today?

  Satan : There are 14 games today, all 28 major league teams will be in action, none of it will be taking place in this building.

  Mamie : Do you have an emery board?

  Satan : Yes.

  [he pulls an emery board out of his shirt pocket] 

  Chuck : Do you prefer couches to armchairs?

  Satan : Depends on what I'm doing. If I'm lounging with a book, I might.

  Mr. Zodsworth : [while still aboard the bus]  Didn't you once have a lizard?

  Satan : Yes, and his name was 'Bubbles.'

  Bridget : Yeah, do the Cubs need a new ballgirl?

  Satan : I don't care.

• Bridget : Hey handsome - couldn't help but notice you were standing here all by yourself, you know? Figured you could use a little company, huh? What do you say? Is there a chemistry between the two of us or am I crazy?

  Martin : Somewhere, ten little dogs are crying.

• Martin : I tried to explain it to my lab assistant. You see, the formula was very simple: dogs. Dogs and numbers. A few letters thrown in to vary the mix, but mostly, dogs and numbers. I tried to explain to her how important the dogs were. She was a moron! She wasn't even a science student, she was a philosophy student trying to make some extra money. I didn't know, but she worked on the cheap.