The Astrologer (1975) Poster

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5/10
Monica Tidwell...nuff said.
caspian19789 June 2021
It may be me, but I was unable to really grasp the plot or follow the story. The acting to me seemed bland and I truly did not care about the story. However, every time Monica Tidwell is on screen, it gets your attention. Monica Tidwell is beyond breathtaking and is a good actor as well. She is pure eye candy and is the strongest attribute of the movie. Monica Tidwell has a limited acting career and was also a professional model in the 70's. There is something about her that keeps you watching. I am not sure, but besides watching her performance, I think there is a plot in the movie as well. Either way, its worth a watch just for Monica Tidwell.
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5/10
Would you play me the transmission on the Crab Nebula?
JohnSeal5 February 2009
Warning: Spoilers
Right from the start, you know this is going to be something special. Suicide Cult begins with voice-over informing us that astronomy has been honed to a precise science by mastermind Alexei (Bob Byrd, sadly NOT the nonagenarian senator), who has dubbed his breakthrough 'zodiacal potential'. We then get solarized footage that cuts between India, Bethesda, Maryland, and Arlington, Virginia, as director James Glickenhaus attempts to weave a story of world-shaking import revolving around the second coming of Christ and a CIA spin off called Interzod. Parts of the film play like one of those old Sunn Classic 'documentaries' such as In Search of Historic Jesus or The Outer Space Connection. Alexei's gal pal Kate is played by Monica Tidwell, a Louisiana-born former Playboy centerfold, and many of the cast have vaguely southern accents, suggesting Suicide Cult was shot below the Mason-Dixon line. This was 25-year old Glickenhaus' first feature, and as a first feature shot on a shoestring budget, it's not entirely terrible, though it can't hold a candle to his next effort, the mind-melting 1980 grindhouse classic The Exterminator. Nevertheless, this is still nutty enough to recommend for hardcore fans of bad '70s cinema.
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4/10
Muddled
thomandybish-1511418 April 2022
For the record, there are two films titled "The Astrologer", both released in 1975 and 1976. Both are deliriously bad. The 1976 offering is the product of Craig Denney, an auteur/egomaniac who stars in a film that boasts a script that is either an exercise in stream-of-consciousness screen writing or was conceived during an acid trip or fever dream. Denney himself seems to be a big part of this film's allure, and more can be found on him and his "masterwork" elsewhere on the net. That isn't the film being examined here. The 1975 film, directed by Jon Glickenhaus, is its own special brand of bad.

I watched this on Tubi, a service that seems to have a tendency to edit prints of horror/sci-fi films. This may be the case with "The Astrologer", but I can't say for certain, as I have no desire to seek out an uncut version. After watching enough movies--good or competent movies, that is--you instinctively know when a movie isn't up to parr. Movies that aren't show their seams, and this one has its seams showing all over the place. Copious narration that gives lengthy exposition dumps, captions that label the time and date of specific scenes, jarring jumps to different locales, and other technical things that make you suspect various people put their shovels in to edit this mess into their concept of what it should be. One thing that indicates an amateurish/inept production is the heavy use of dubbing. Most all of the secondary or minor characters are dubbed--this is glaringly evident in the scene in which the female lead, played by Monica Tidwell, visits a fortune teller, and again in the dinner scene in which leads Tidwell and Bill Byrd visit a colleague of Byrd's. Interestingly, the one actor who isn't dubbed--but should have been--was Tidwell, whose molasses-thick Louisiana accent is distracting. Tidwell, a former Playboy Playmate, wasn't cast for her vocal talent, as the nude scenes near the end clearly indicate. Casting is another millstone. The self-important subject of the US government using astrology to keep tabs on potential evil threats would, you would think, necessitate casting some name actors to plump up the flick's marquee value, but alas, no. Not even stalwarts like Joseph Cotton, Glen Ford, Donald Pleasance, or Cameron Mitchell could be procured, which speaks volumes about how low budget this thing was--those guys would appear in anything!

Instead, we get Tidwell, as mentioned earlier, Bill Byrd(who?), and the producer, sporting brown body makeup, eyeliner, and a hypnotic stare, sort of looking like a cross between Jesus and Rasputin.

It could be chalked up to a low budget or first-time director, but the whole production looks like a TV series--cheap sets, scenes supposedly set in India but looking like somebody's back yard, and heavy use of stock footage--either a money saving or run time stretching trick, who knows? The film makers also try to shoehorn too much information about government agencies, end-times conspiracies, and the titular astrology into 90 minutes or under 80 minutes, depending on the cut you're viewing. One thing that can be said in this film's favor is that it isn't boring--it lurches from overheated melodrama to exposition dumps to lengthy uses of stock footage to lengthy closeups of the producer as the bad guy to gratuitous gypsy dancing to Monica Tidwell naked. The ultimate question is this: why haven't the crew of RiffTraxx seized on this?
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One OBSCURE 70's Flick!
jesslb15 October 2002
I saw this film at my local videostore. The box looked awsome, it had an obscure title, and I'd never heard of it before, so naturally I rented it! Well, it's true when they say don't judge a movie by the cover! This film, directed by James Glickenhaus of 'Slaughter of the Innocence' fame, is a muddled, slow, and hard to catogorize film about a super-intelligent astrologer named "Alexi" who is on the verge of a scientific breakthrough. He thinks he has found a way to merge astrology and advanced computers into a sophisticated science to benefit mankind. How a subplot about a strange cult leader with hypnotic powers who has something to do with the "Second Coming" fits into this plot is beyond any casual viewer!

As you probally can tell the plot is strange to say the least but it is VERY intriguing. If you find this film, rent it just to have your mind baffled for 82 minutes!
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5/10
Mildly fascinating trash.
HumanoidOfFlesh11 July 2010
"Suicide Cult" has to be seen to be believed.This utterly strange,ludicrous and somewhat fascinating pile of trash mixes astrology,CIA intrigue,Jim Jones-type mass murder and the second coming of Jesus Christ.So the Second Coming of Messiah is about to begin in ten days.There is also a secret branch of CIA called Interzod and the creepy leader of evil sect,who orders his followers to commit mass suicides.It seems also that the blonde girlfriend of the main character Alexei Abarnel is the reincarnation of the Virgin Mary.Extremely bizarre and disjointed horror film made by James "The Exterminator" Glickenhaus.The action is boring and the scenes set in India look very cheaply.5 out of 10.
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3/10
Weird, weird, ...Very frikking weird!
Coventry6 January 2023
Do you know that feeling when you already sat halfway through a certain movie, and then you suddenly realize you still don't have the slightest clue what it's about or where the plot is heading towards to? I have, and it's usually very frustrating, but for some inexplicable reason, it wasn't too frustrating during "The Astrologer".

This obscure and low-budgeted mid-70s oddity manages to be terribly bad and incomprehensible, and yet strangely compelling all at once! The common sense functions of my brain wanted to stop watching, or at least push the fast-forward button, at several points throughout the movie, but I just couldn't. From what I gather, both a self-acclaimed scientific genius and an evil Indian hypnotist are looking for a girl who shares her exact same time of birth with that of the Virgin Mary, because she's able to conceive the Second Coming. Or something... The scientist found her, and it's the lovely looking Monica Tidwell. He even married the girl but refuses to have sex with her, because immaculate conception needs to take place. Or something...

You should probably look for an accurate plot description elsewhere or try to decipher source novel by John Cameron (not James...). All I can say is that "The Astrologer" is worth seeing for fans of 70s cult/trash, if only for the gratuitous nude sequences of Tidwell (the poor girl even must undress for a fortune telling) and a few random but gory kills. It's also the debut of James Glickenhaus, who would later direct a couple of modest cult horror/action hits like "The Exterminator", "The Soldier" and "McBain".
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2/10
Confusing, Talky Paranoia Thriller
jfrentzen-942-2042112 February 2024
Also released as SUICIDE CLUB.

Alexei, wealthy astrologer and leader of a secret intelligence agency called Interzod, listens to radio signals from the Crab Nebula and is obsessed with a demonic Indian revolutionary, Kajerste (played with Pan-like creepiness by producer Mark Buntzman).

The Interzod board of directors sit around watching films of mutilated victims whose deaths they "arranged." One of their female agents gets close to Kajerste, only to be murdered during a ritual sex ceremony. Next, a congressman and Alexei's "gal Friday" sneak into Kajerste's jungle camp, intending to sedate him, plant electrodes in his head, and somehow control his actions via TV; the plan goes to hell and they die.

We learn that Kajerste, product of a virgin birth, is also manipulated by unnamed evil forces. A subplot involves Alexei's ditzy wife, who is apparently the reincarnation of the Blessed Mother.

Apart from an unusual scene in which a woman is hypnotized to stab herself to death, this movie is confusing and talky. Director Glickenhaus went on to make his second film, THE EXTERMINATOR (1981), which was a hit. He has a cameo role as a spy who drives a sports car.
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3/10
The very humble beginnings of James Glickenhaus in this very silly horror film
IonicBreezeMachine24 June 2023
Astrologist Alexei Abarnel (Bob Byrd) is the head of the InterZod institute which uses an array of telescopes and computers to take in information of the skys and apply it to individuals and measure the Zodiatic Potential (or ZP) of specific individuals to measure they propensity for good and evil. As Alexei analyzes information that can hopefully lead him to the Second coming, the intstitute also notes a violent cult leader in India named Kajerste (Mark Buntzman) who might be the anti-christ.

The Astrologer (later released as The Suicide Cult) is the first film made by noted producer/director James Glickenhaus who'd later be better known for his action films such as Exterminator and The Soldier as well as producing or distributing various cult b-films like Maniac Cop or Frankenhooker. Using $20,000 he inherited, Glickenhaus acquired the rights to his father in law John Cameron's novel The Astrologer. After failing to find a distributor, Glickenhaus eventually traveled around the Southern United States and showcased the film at various drive-ins over a period of nine months with not much success. Glickenhaus has gone on to acknowledge the film was not very good and said it played a factor in his focus towards more action oriented material like The Exterminator which he'd deliberately designed to have more action and less dialogue than The Astrologer. Glickenhaus would eventually sell the film to 21st Century Film Corporation who'd re-edit and re-title it as The Suicide Cult hoping to capitalize on the then recent Jonestown tragedy, but whether this was successful or not I can't say. Whether you call it The Astrologer or The Suicide Cult, the movie's a very silly and often roughly produced exercise for a first time director.

From a rambling opening narration that clumsily establishes InterZod, Alexei Abarnel, and the context of searching for the Second Coming, the movie feels very flabby and directionless with no real story or plot going on and instead just a directionless series of events that happen. There's many scenes of Alexei in board meetings or viewing film footage in a darkened board room and the focus of the film in the first half hour bounces around different times and locations with the grace of a needle skipping on a record. I guess there's some unintentional hilarity to be had from the fact the movie is taking its whole astrology focus so seriously even trying to tie it in with political machinations of Washington D. C., but there's so little actual conflict in this film that until the last 15 minutes it never feels like anything is actually at stake and even then not really and capped off with a moment of unintentional humor.

This is prime bad movie fodder and if it weren't for the ample supply of nudity it would've appeared on MST3K a long time ago. For bad movie fans, this will be a treat.
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7/10
Pure weirdness
BandSAboutMovies21 October 2017
Whenever someone asks — and they often do — "What's the craziest movie you've ever seen?" I usually respond with Suicide Cult. I've never had to pick my jaw off the floor more, as watching it felt like the little people I am certain live in my TV were putting on a magical play just for me, using the things I love best. The 1970s. Carnivals. Satanism. Biorhythms. Astrology. Government conspiracies. Religion . This is one film that honestly has it all — and then some.

People also ask me, what movies are you excited about this summer? I always answer, "NONE OF THEM!" Not when bursts of pure unknown crazy can still be unearthed from four decades in the past about psychic killers or astrologers who become giant stars that murder people! I beg you Hollywood! Let maniacs take over your films again!

Read more at bandsaboutmovies.com/2017/08/02/suicide-cult-1975
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10/10
Early Glickenhaus is a total head scratcher
udar5512 June 2013
Warning: Spoilers
Let me see if I can explain this one. Alexei (Bob Byrd) leads a secret government group called InterZod, which calculates a person's life path via their Zodiacal Potential. Their main focus is an Indian guru (producer Mark Buntzman), who may or may not be evil incarnate, and Kate (Monica Tidwell), who may or may not be the second coming of the Virgin Mary and is married to Alexei. Director James Glickenhaus' debut feature isn't indicative of his later action packed work at all, but it is certainly one of the oddest films I've seen recently. Based on a 1972 novel by John Cameron, THE ASTROLOGER throws so much stuff at the audience in the first 25 minutes that you'll need a notepad to keep up. It doesn't help that there is some chaotic editing going on. I felt just like the U.S. Senator character when a woman says to him, "None of this makes much sense to you, does it?" I'm sure the book has lots of grand ideas, but Glickenhaus just doesn't have the budget to pull it off (it looks like he got a reel of footage of real footage from India and shot the rest of the India scenes in the woods of New York). That said, you'll never be bored and will probably get a laugh or two out of it (the rescue mission to get Kate from a gypsy camp had me dying). I give it a 10 rating just for the insanity.
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6/10
SECOND COMING
kirbylee70-599-52617926 March 2020
Warning: Spoilers
Director/producer James Glickenhaus made some of my favorite films in the 80s. I loved THE EXTERMINATOR, THE SOLDIER, THE PROTECTOR and SHAKEDOWN. They were action films that grabbed you by the throat and held you there. So when I heard Severin was releasing Glickenhaus' first film, one I wasn't familiar with, I was excited to say the least. What I ended up watching was something different than the rest.

THE ASTROLOGER follows an organization known as the Interzod Organization. Funded over centuries by various groups they're currently part of the US government. What the organization does is determine people's "zodiacal potential" to determine if they will be good or bad and act accordingly. Their current head is Alexei Abernal (Bob Byrd) who has determined that the second coming is about to happen. The only problem is whether or not the child will be born to a good or evil father.

While all of this is going on Alexie's wife Kate (Monica Tidwell) has seen a fortune teller who is concerned about what her future holds. Somehow the woman could tell when she gave her date of birth it wasn't correct. Kate is also having issues with Alexei since even though they've been married several years he still hasn't had sex with her. Could it be there is a connection between her and the birth being predicted?

Add to this a mysterious stranger, the leader of a suicide cult who has appeared in Kate's dreams. Kajerste (Mark Buntzman) is a mystic from India who plays a part in what is transpiring as well. But just what part he will play isn't known until the end.

So is the movie any good? Well yes and no. It has a truly interesting story based on the book by John Cameron (Glickenhaus' father-in-law) and plenty of story on hand. Perhaps that's the biggest problem though, it feels like it has too much story. The convoluted plot is drawn out in lengthy back and forth dialogue filled moments without a lot of other things taking place. This gives us a slow paced film that suffers slightly because of it. In spite of that the movie is interesting and holds your interest.

Made on a shoestring budget and Glickenhaus first feature film he even notes that the movie provided him the opportunity to learn from the experience, the biggest lesson being films need more visual actions to hold an audience's attention. Watching this film compared to his others you can see he learned the lesson well. The film does show promise for a young first time director though.

The acting here isn't the worst in the world but it is very dry. Byrd plays the role as well as can be but still has difficulty putting any emotion into the part. That he has no other credits to his name isn't surprising. Perhaps the only cast member to appear in more films is Tidwell who parlayed her appearance as a Playboy centerfold into this film and 5 more. She shows potential here but it went unused as most of her films offer less acting and more of her displaying her charms.

For fans of Glickenhaus and those who long to have a complete collection of the director's films this is a treat though. Severin has gone out of their way to make this a quality offering beginning with a 4k scan of the original negative from the director's personal answer print. While the film stock isn't great you won't get a better picture. In addition to that they have a number of extras that make picking this up worthwhile. They include "Sign of the Times" an interview with Glickenhaus discussing the film, "Monica Tidwell Remembers THE ASTROLOGER" an interview with Tidwell, "Tales from the Set" interviews with filmmakers Brendan Faulkner and Frank M. Farsel, "Zodiacal Locations" a look at the various locations used in the film today and a reversible cover using the other name the film was released under, SUICIDE CULT.

I've praised Severin before as I have Arrow Video and will continue to do so. Why? Because they are rescuing forgotten films that fans have sought out over the years and been forced to own multi-generational bootleg copies of. Their respect to these films and their handling of them needs to be encouraged and applauded. So if you're a fan of Glickenhaus or this film, this is the copy you need to own.
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Five-year endeavor yielded a fairly positive result.
EyeAskance14 August 2011
There is a covert government agency called INTERZOD which documents "atrological potential", and tracks individuals whom they deem "astrologically privileged". The head of this agency is married to a wispy little thing who can't understand why her husband won't make love to her. Meanwhile, a man in India is being closely watched by INTERZOD, as his "astrological disadvantage" may be strong enough to consider him a potential Antichrist-type being.

It took me five years to get through my ancient VHS copy of this film, with each viewing putting me about ten minutes further into the story than my previous attempt...truly, this is one BORING little movie...that is, until you've passed the halfway-mark. My determination to finally watch this from beginning to end actually paid off...the second half puts the pieces of the puzzle together(if a tad clumsily), and renders the entire project redeemed of its terminally dull intro. It's not an especially GOOD film, but it has interesting foundations, and is surprisingly professional in its microbudget formulation. I neither wholeheartedly recommend nor dissuade viewing SUICIDE CULT, but you might opt to give yourself a five-year-plan to watch it should it fall into your hands.

5.5/10
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10/10
Top 10 of best worst movies
byng3 April 2021
If you like bad movies watch this right away. Hope one day this makes it to How Did This Get Made.
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