The Jupiter Menace (1982) User Reviews

My eyes grew wider, my jaw dropped lower

[roland-sinn · 6/10 · 19 August 2003]

Dear George, why did you star in this … production? What were you on? What did the producers have on you?

I saw JM for sale for $5 at my local discount DVD store weeks ago and avoided purchasing it for fear that it would be utter @&$#. Last week I relented and purchased it instead of a Big Mac ™ and Fries ™. I am so glad I did!

George Kennedy narrates this quazi documentary with a look of perpetual horror on his face. Understandably he would have been terrified of family members and friends viewing him making an idiot out of himself.

JM is an astounding mix of religious rantings and questionable scientific evidence. Strange psychics, gun-tottin' survivalists and neo-christian lunatics are all interviewed about their ‘theories' about the end of the world. Some of these ‘people' are seriously insane.

For lovers of the truly bizarre, I highly recommend JM. It is one of the strangest shows I have ever seen. I'm actually wondering whether the film is actually a serious documentary or a clever and convincing spoof about the lunatic fringe.

JM is a fantastic film to watch with friends. Guaranteed to make you laugh, make you gasp, make you cry: What the?!

6/10

Some fascinating stuff amidst the goofier stuff

[Maciste_Brother · 5/10 · 6 November 2003]

If you like watching UNSOLVED MYSTERIES, IN SEARCH OF series with Leonard Nimoy, or these kind of shows seen on TLC, you'll probably like THE JUPITER MENACE. The events they say will occur never happened in real life but that doesn't mean the film doesn't contain some interesting bits of information or ideas, most of which have been widely copied ever since. Because of the overall familiarity of the subject, I'd say that TJM is probably the most ripped-off movies of all time. And yet, few people know about it. It is very obscure.

Best-selling author Graham Hancock and his books about ancient civilizations predicting the end of the world, world wide cataclysmic events, the poles shifting, Antarctica, etc, basically took his ideas from this pseudo-documentary. Seriously, Hancock became a millionaire by little or no research. He just watched THE JUPITER MENACE.

Anyway, I love watching obscure movies and this one is really obscure. I only heard about this 20 year old movie in the past couple of weeks. I always keep an open mind with these kind of pseudo-scientific films. It's always easy for me to overlook the silly stuff and simply keep the really interesting ideas. And THE JUPITER MENACE does have a lot of interesting things about it amidst the goofier stuff. Also, on a sociological level, it's an interesting time capsule. I didn't regret buying the video on eBay.

What's good: the soundtrack

[dano16 · 5/10 · 4 August 2005]

Although the content of the movie itself is a bit on the lame side (though quite amusing), the soundtrack is a real treat for those who have an ear for early electronic music. It is performed by Synergy (Larry Fast), who produced several cutting-edge electronic music albums starting in the mid-70's. You can still find CD's of this soundtrack and Synergy's other works if you search the internet. I recently picked up an autographed copy of this soundtrack CD for the same price as what you'd pay for a regular disc at the local record store. Google "the artist shop" if you're interested (this is not an advertisement, but I personally have been very satisfied with all of my purchases there).

Conspiracyploitation

[lor_ · 8 February 2023]

My review was written in June 1984 after watching the film on Thorn EMI video cassette.

Made in 1981, "The Jupiter Menace" is a gee-whiz, scare documentary elaborating on the basic premise that our world will come to an end in December 1982 when the planetary alignment fulfills various prophecy by psychics, prophets and scientists foretelling doom. Since things still are running smoothly, theatrically unreleased docu is vaguely reassuring to watch on video cassette, though it promises another truly devastating cataclysm by the year 2000.

Boasting top-notch special effects, model work and computer animation by experts such as an underground filmmaker Scott Bartlett (who previously contributed to "American Graffiti" and "Altered States"), "Menace basically resembles the numerous goofball docus cranked out a decade ago by Sunn Classics and others to intrigue credulous audiences lured by hardsell ads and booked on a four-wall basis. Actor George Kennedy walks the viewer through an assortment of theories that forecast cataclysmic upheavals on Earth in the near future. Filmmakers chea by interchangeably mixing real scientists and psychics with actors pretending to be "real' in their equally unconvincing explanations of why (and how) the Earth's poles are suddenly going to shift, plunging us into an instant ice age, or some such other quack notion.

An interesting segment midway spotlights on various groups of "survivalists", those friendly folks (spoofed i the 1983 Robin Williams flo film "The Survivors" who seem to have memorized Ray Milland's 1962 film "Panic in Year Zero" and are busily arming themselves in the belief that protection against one's fellow man is the best way to handle an impending natural disaster. The Stelle Community near Chicago, repped on screen by technical expert Tim Wilhelm, are the type of people who would heartily endorse Dr. Strangelove's plans enumerated in the 1963 Stanley Kubrick film of that name, rather than recognize them as satire or a cautionary message. Lest one conclude that they are on the right track, please note these folks are planning to build 2-3,000 airships (for completion by the year 1999) in which to hover above the Earth until it is safe to land again, at which future time they will form a new post-Apocalyptic community called "Philadelphia".

A bit more frightening are the people of Zarephath Hoeb community in the Ozarks, who believe they're on a mission from God and stress war games and violent self-defense training. They mirror the existence of thousands of "normal' people who attend weekly military exercises, probably having overdosed on too many World War III movies which inevitably feature that cliched scene of looters and nasty neighbors who will invade your hard-earned bomb shelter if you aren't ready to shoot them down.

Since the film's exec producers, Peter Davis and William Panzer, made the film "St. Helens" in 1980, there is footage of the volcano erupting and mucho boring predictions of super-earthquakes worldwide. A computer simulation of a 12-point (Richter scale) earthquake is thoroughly unconvincing, as is a cheapo look at a video display purportedly showing us a flat topped sunken pyramid 40 miles off the Florida coast.

For those who desperately want to believe in his nonsense, the next super conjunction of planets is due to occur May 5, 2000. If you thought the world ended in 1982, wait till you see what happens to it 16 years from now.

At least the soundtrack is good!

[awerling · 2/10 · 29 May 2001]

Happily, the music score to this documentary is still in print, and recommended for those into electronic music. Other than that, however, there is nothing to recommend this film. The "interviews" are obviously scripted, and too much "evidence" is based on the Bible and psychics. The predictions in the film never came true, but this review is not based on that. Even though the music is a scream, it seems inappropriately pasted into the documentary. Probably not a good use of one's time, except for perhaps the many examples of bad 80s hair.

Probably the best worst movie of all time.

[Escarpe · 1/10 · 5 October 2006]

And it just gets better with age, The Music is so bad it's good, the acting is so bad it's good and the plot....well. it seems that it was put together by a random plot generator, or rather a random conspiracy generator. The start is promising enough, some nice model work, a cool synthesizer re-working of Holst's Mars the bringer of war, a pre-credit sequence where some guy gets his heart cut out. Then George Kennedy pops up in a safari suit and it all goes to pot. The Bible prophecies? Emerging science? Psychics the world over? What does it all mean and what does it have to do with Jupiter and why is it so menacing? I don't think it's a spoiler to say, you never find out. A quasi biblical scene seems to arrive from another movie, not actually an account from any part of the bible but an amalgam of a few with a nameless prophet and a craven idol, it seems to be making a point….but you never find out what that might be. Then George comes back to tell us about more biblical prophecy that probably won't come true…..then oh then….The guy who programmed the bible into this Micro-bee and then the computer told him that the world would end, by an earthquake, so cool. I must say that the planet fly-bys are very good especially for the time. Worth watching if just for the Psychic's moustache and the amazing prediction and simulation of an earthquake in a computer….before that was possible.

I don't recall this ever happening?

[Vincent_B · 1/10 · 2 March 2005]

This truly awful documentary was funded by the Baptist Church, and if you can get a copy I suggest you watch it. Why? It is so funny, I was on the floor, in tears with laughter. Not exactly what you would expect, but most future events in this movie are supposed occur from 1985 to 2000. I really want to make a trip to see if those people ever built their fleet of zeppelins to survive the apocalypse. Also right toward the end of this turkey you see what are supposed to be scientists running a "computer simulation" of what might happen. If you look close at the end credits those scientists are played by actors. Most people with any sense, can see the laboratory is nothing more than a sci-fi set with blinking lights. I pop this on every time I want a good laugh or two.

THIS IS AMAZING

[jellopuke · 5/10 · 25 October 2020]

A kook filled look at crazies saying the world is going to suffer massive earthquakes starting in 1982 and culminating with a planetary alignment on May 5, 2000 that will destroy all civilization. What more could you want? This is so awesome to watch after all these earnest nut jobs have been proven wrong. A great soundtrack and a great party movie!

Great Fun!

[tnt videovisions · 8/10 · 14 June 2001]

One hopes that George Kennedy was either well paid or was unaware of the full intent of those behind "The Jupiter Menace." In his defense, Kennedy appears only a few times throughout this "documentary" and doesn't embarrass himself to any great extent. Among the crop of Bigfoot, Bermuda Triangle, and UFO "documentaries" made in the 1970s and into the '80s, "Jupiter Menace" is a real gem. The film reveals its dire message that an alignment of planets in the, then near future, 1982 will start a period of turmoil on Earth that will reach its peak in 2000 causing a basic end of the world as we know it. The film is a prime example of this silly scare genre and includes goofy re-enactments and interviews with "experts" that are taking facts from Bible prophecy and/or psychic visions. Certainly more amusing today, now that we've passed all the dates foretold in the movies as being doomsday, this movie will entertain those curious. Particularly fun is the near-guarantee given by nearly everyone interviewed in the film that May 5th, 2000 is the certain end of the happy existence we've enjoyed on planet Earth. Also fun and equally frightening are the interviews with survivalists in the Ozarks and Illinois that are preparing to survive the deadly days ahead of us all in the 1980s. One must wonder, where are those folks now??? Sadly, they're likely still packed away in a bunker somewhere! :)

Unbelievable film. recommend to everyone!

[HaPeEw · 10/10 · 12 August 2002]

this was quite a movie. I was glued to my television from start to finish. I don't think my eyes left the set. I have always been a George Kennedy fan and this film confirmed that love. The director was at the top of his game, and the script was flawless, it never slows. It is a rollercoaster of conspiracy and intrigue that even those that do not belive that there will one day be an apocalypse will walk away wondering. "Are we alone?", "Is there alien intteligence?", " is the bible right in its predictions?" all these questions and more will be answered once you've seen this film. I recommend this film to everyone and urge you to go rent it today, you won't be disappointed!

SURPRISINGLY GOOD!!!!!!

[dc33-1 · 10/10 · 6 August 2002]

Well i must say, my friends all told me about this movie and i was apprehensive, to say the least. I have never been one for conspiricy theory films, so i thought this would be no exception. I was wrong. ten minutes into it and i was hooked. George Kennedy's narration was superb, and the story really got me thinking about our planet and if others may exist. I reccomend this film to anyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Awesome flick!

[lisalaggieg · 10/10 · 3 August 2002]

I saw this movie about two years ago and haven't been able to get it out of my head since. If your local video store doesn't have it, put in a request, you won't regret it!!! This movie has an awesome soundtrack and a plot that really makes you think. The writer's are geniuses! You'll love it.

Awesome Film

[ape_troll · 10/10 · 30 August 2002]

This movie changed my life. I have always just thought of the apocalypse as folklore or fairytale; however, this movie really made me think about what it all means. The whole content of the movie changed my viewpoint of religion and life in general. It has an amazing soundtrack. Just thinking about it sends chills down my spine. I recommend this film to everyone, you must see this film!

Great! For all those duped by end of the world scenarios, a must see!

[jmcgregor-4 · 10/10 · 1 July 2009]

This title was waiting to be picked up at my local 'Dollar Shop' and beckoned to be purchased.

With George Kennedy narrating, priests and psychics corroborating, special scientific effects, and an 80s 'end of the world' doomsday atmosphere pervading, who could go wrong?

Either way it's bound to be a fun ride!

But don't let the melodramatics fool you. This is a serious documentary which obviously had the budget to deliver an interesting (and very topical) message.

It's just the thing ordered for skeptics on the end of the world, with some ridiculous aspects (which can be taken as commentary), and some good information as well.

For all those who were expecting a millennial 'end of the world', a must see.

George Kennedy does an excellent job as narrator, great special effects, good sound track, overall a very interesting production which takes you all around the world and which keeps you thinking.

10 out of 10!