Chung-Yu Huang: Turtle Man
Photos
Quotes
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Yamcha : Someone told me your kung-fu is very nice... and he wants to challenge you! If he beats you, then he'll be famous!
Turtle Man : So someone wants to challenge me... Who is he? Tell me, who is he?
Yamcha : He'll be here very soon...
[points at a boat carrying Monkey Boy, Seetou, Jen-Jen and Piggy]
Turtle Man : Oh? He's coming now? Okay, I'll show him!
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[Turtle Man goggles Seetou]
Turtle Man : [drooling] Oh, my... you're beautiful... curves in the right places... what a beautiful figure! Oh, my whole body's itching, I'm itchy, well, here, and itchy there...
[starts scratching himself]
Turtle Man : I'm itching all over for you!
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[Roshi summons the Nimbus]
Son Goku : What is that?
Yamcha : You're stupid!
Son Goku : You know, do you?
Yamcha : It's his magic cloud!
Turtle Man : Right! I captured this cloud many, many centuries ago, and I imbued it with magic powers and turned it into my private car! And the magic cloud has one specialty: people who are dishonest and have an impure mind, will never be able to get on it!
Bulma : So then, you can sit on it?
Turtle Man : ME?... Of course I can! I'll show you now!
[jumps on the Nimbus]
Turtle Man : See that? I'm an honest man! My mind is pure too! That's why I'm able to get on this cloud! Right, go! Move it! Fly!
[the Nimbus throws him off]
Turtle Man : Goddamn you lazybones, how dare you make a fool out of me in front of a pretty girl!
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Turtle Man : [cackles] My pretty little lady, do you want to have this Dragon Pearl?
[holds out his own Pearl]
Bulma : If you're willing to part with it, of course I'll take it!
Turtle Man : I'm gonna let you have it, but... uh... you have to do something for it!
Bulma : So what do you want?
Turtle Man : I've been living on this remote island for all my life, and I've never seen a girl as pretty as you! So I... so I... well... I want... I want to see you without any clothes on!
Oolong : How dare you, you dirty old man! How can you think of something as low as that?
Son Goku : Master, that's too much!
Turtle Man : Hey, kid, sex is human nature!
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Son Goku : Magic cloud, you can go home now! When I need you I'll call you, okay?
[the Nimbus dissipates into OK letters and vanishes]
Turtle Man : Goddamn you! Goddamn you, son of a jerkball! I've treated you for so many years! When I served you, I had to toss for hours to please you! But now you jump when he tells you to jump and fly when he tells you to fly, you jerk? Why do you treat me like this? You got that, fouled-up bitch?
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King Horn : Give me the Pearl, or I'll kill him!
Son Gohan : Don't give it to him, if you do we all die! Go!
Son Goku : Master, please give him the Pearl, or he'll kill Grandpa! Please!
Turtle Man : But your grandpa's right, if I give him the Dragon Pearl we'll all die anyway!
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Turtle Man : Magic cloud!
[the Nimbus appears in the sky and Roshi leaps on it]
Turtle Man : [jumps on the cloud] Magic cloud, now I order you to take me to the four corners of the world and find me pretty girls! Hah! Come on!... Hey, lazybones, don't wanna move, do ya? GO!
[the Nimbus takes off... sweeping the Turtle Man out from under it]
Turtle Man : You idiot! I'll get you for this!
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[an attack from Zebrata obliterates Roshi's home]
Turtle Man : JESUS! How dare you blow up my house like that!
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Yamcha : That was dirty! You fight dirty! You're no gentleman!
Turtle Man : Oooooh, but you're a sneaky little thief! You want to steal my magic cloud! You asked for this!
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Turtle Man : So what do you think of my magic cloud, then?
Son Goku : Not bad! It's obedient!
Turtle Man : Hmmmm. But it's not obedient with me, though... You lazybones, you're no good! Ah, you're no use! I'll give you away, to HIM!
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Turtle Man : You have a Dragon Pearl?
Bulma : Yes, I have a Five-Star Pearl!
Son Goku : My granddad had one too, but the baddies stole it from him!
Pansy : My home had one too, and the baddies stole it from us!
Bulma : Now these baddies have three Pearls, and they're trying to find the other four Pearls! We heard that your kung-fu was good, and we came to ask you to help us stop the evil monsters!
Pansy : [goes on her knees] They destroyed our village! Master, please help us stop these evil people!
Turtle Man : Get up, there's no need for that! Don't you worry! That monster may have three Pearls, but they're no good unless you get all seven of them together, you know that? And without me, he'll never be able to achieve what he wants!
Bulma : Why's that?
Turtle Man : Because I have in my possession a Two-Star Dragon Pearl! Without it, how can he get what he wants, eh?
[presents it]
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[Westwood tries to escape]
Turtle Man : Westwood, without my permission, you can't leave this island no matter how hard you try!
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[Westwood hands over his Pearl]
Bulma : A Six-Star Pearl. Oh, thank you!
[Seetou kisses Westwood, who falls over in shock]
Turtle Man : Aah, what a useless boy! Useless youngsters! I would give my life, to have a girl kiss me!
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Son Goku : Why didn't you tell us you had a Pearl?
Oolong : My teacher told me not to tell anyone!
Turtle Man : Where is your teacher?
Oolong : Oh, he's very famous! Everybody knows him, including every dog, and even every cat, because...
Turtle Man : [knocks his head] Just say it!
Oolong : The Pig Fairy! My teacher said if I showed the Pearl, people would steal it! He said I must find you guys! That's why I used Jade to meet up with you! I think, now the time is right, so I showed the Pearl to you!
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King Horn : Give me the Pearl if you wish to stay alive!
Turtle Man : Come and get it, if you can!
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Son Gohan : [about King Horn's Dragon Pearls] I suspect they're inside his stomach...
Turtle Man : Hmm...
Son Gohan : Turtle Man, are you thinking of getting that Dragon Pearl inside his stomach, too?
Turtle Man : Right! When the seven Pearls mix, he'll explode!
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Turtle Man : But then, why'd Westwood tell me one of you wanted to fight me?
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[Piggy disguises himself as Seetou]
Oolong : Darling...
Turtle Man : So, have you made a decision yet?
Oolong : [seductively] Oh, yes I have...
Turtle Man : Oh...?
Oolong : Come here!
[Roshi lets out a whoop and starts to dance with Seetou]
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[dazed after seeing Seetou topless]
Turtle Man : She's so sexy... she's just incredible... I've never been so crazy about a girl... she's wonderful! I've finally really lived!
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[a turtle shell is seen floating on the water]
Pansy : Master!
Bulma : Master!
Oolong : Master, you're still alive!
Turtle Man : [wading out of the ocean, half-naked] Are you kidding? Nobody can get rid of ME that easily!... But still, my house is destroyed, and my Dragon Pearl stolen! These people will not get away with this!
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Son Goku : Westwood, why are you following us?
Yamcha : Don't forget, one of those Dragon Pearls you lost belonged to me in the first place. I have a right to look for it too, you know!
Turtle Man : Good! You're welcome to join our group!
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Turtle Man : So, then, every one of us here all have a relationship with a Dragon Pearl, is that right?
[everyone agrees]
Son Goku : [to Piggy] Hey, you don't!
Oolong : Uh... you're right! I don't have a Dragon Pearl, I've no relationship with it...
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Turtle Man : Now we own the last Pearl that monster needs... let's go get him!
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Turtle Man : Turtle shot!
