Almost Heroes (1998)

Patrick Cranshaw: Jackson

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jackson : Sir, Higgins has a story.

  Edwards : Well, Higgins the floor is yours.

  Higgins : This particular event happened last summer on my uncle's farm in Virginia. My brother and I had just finished cutting a field of hay and were enjoying the evening meal under the shade of an elm tree. He went down for water by the creek and when he was gone, I took a bowl that was filled with delicious plum pudding and placed into it, not one, but two large pieces of sheep shit. When he returned I encouraged him to taste the plum pudding... And as sure as Im standing before you, he did! He ate it all. Shit Pudding!

  Edwards : You got your brother to eat sheep dung. That is a very interesting story.

  Hunt : Tell him the ending, that's the best part.

  Higgins : Oh yeah. To be perfectly honest with you sir, I have no brother. It was me. I ate sheep shit! Swear to God.

  Edwards : Clever twist there on the ending.

• Jackson : I'm looking for Leslie Edwards.

  Edwards : I am Leslie Edwards.

  Jackson : M'name's Jackson. It's been my lifelong dream to see the Pacific Ocean before I die. Please take me with you.

  Hunt : An old bag of bones like you wouldn't make it 100 yards upriver.

  Jackson : On my worst day, I could still beat the stuffin' outta you. You... puffed-up crow's cock!

  Hunt : No, you couldn't.

  Jackson : [to Hunt]  I know.

  [to Edwards] 

  Jackson : Please take me with you! I must see the Pacific! Can you deny an old man his dream?

  Edwards : I cannot, and I will not.

  [Hunt reacts with severe disapproval, shaking his head] 

  Edwards : Jackson, you may accompany us.

  [Jackson is overjoyed] 

  Hunt : [storms away]  Horse's ass!

  Jackson : [calls after him]  Turd!

  Edwards : Help us load the boats.

  Jackson : [hurries away]  Sorry; can't do. I'm an old man.