The Santa Clause (1994)
Eric Lloyd: Charlie Calvin
Photos
Quotes
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Charlie : Whoa, Dad! You're flying!
Scott Calvin : It's okay, I'm used to it. I lived through the '60s.
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Charlie : Get the bag of toys.
Scott Calvin : And do what?
Charlie : Go down the chimney.
Scott Calvin : Down the chimney? You want me to take the toys down the chimney into a strange house, IN MY UNDERWEAR?
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Bernard : I'll ship the list to your house.
Scott Calvin : What list?
Bernard : You know, the list.
[sings quietly]
Bernard : He's making a list...
Charlie : [singing loudly] Checkin' it twice!
Elves : [chorusing] Gonna find out who's naughty or nice!
[Bernard groans]
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Scott Calvin : Hey, Charlie, you know how to call 911?
Charlie : Sure, 9-1-1.
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Bernard : What's all this boo-hooin' going on here?
[to Neil, who suddenly backs away from him]
Bernard : Hey, how are you doing?
Scott : Nothing, Bernard. I'm just saying good-bye to Charlie.
Bernard : What good-bye? Charlie, you've still got the glass ball I gave you, right?
Charlie : Yeah.
Bernard : Well, all you've got to do is shake it, whenever you want to see your dad.
Charlie : [his face lights up] Really?
Bernard : He can come back to see you anytime, day or night. Hey, have i ever steered ya wrong?
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Charlie : Neil's a really good cook.
Scott Calvin : Yeah, and you should see him walk on water.
Charlie : You don't like him very much, do you, Dad?
Scott Calvin : Charlie, I'm sorry, I was just kidding around around. Sure I like him. But there's just something about him that makes me want to -...
Charlie : Lash out irrationally?
Scott Calvin : Now, where did you hear that?
Charlie : From Neil. I learn a lot from him. He listens to me.
Scott Calvin : Yeah! And he charges you for it.
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Charlie : These are Santa's reindeer, aren't they?
Scott Calvin : I hope not. These are... A gift. Probably from the cable company. We're getting the Disney Channel now. Merry Christmas.
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Charlie : Dad?
Scott Calvin : What is it, Charlie?
Charlie : Maybe you better leave some milk and cookies out, just in case. Okay?
Scott Calvin : Great. I'll just go pre-heat the oven.
Charlie : And don't forget the fire extinguisher!
Scott Calvin : Good night, Charlie!
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Scott Calvin : Here we are. Denny's. Always open.
Charlie : I don't wanna eat here.
Scott Calvin : What are you talking about? Everybody likes Denny's, it's an American institution.
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Dr. Neil Miller : Charlie, I'm sorry I didn't believe you.
Charlie : That's okay, Neil. You were just denying your inner child.
Dr. Neil Miller : You're going to make a great psychiatrist someday, kid.
Charlie : Nah. I think that I'm going to go into the family business.
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Scott Calvin : [the bag lifts him up] Hey, hey, HEY, wait! There is no chimney here, okay? No chimney!
Charlie : Lookin' good, Dad.
Scott Calvin : [hovers over a thin pipe] You have *got* to be kidding me.
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Charlie : My dad is Santa Claus.
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Charlie : [after Santa has fallen off of the roof] Look, Dad, he disappeared.
Scott Calvin : [looks around] He's naked somewhere.
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Charlie : You said you believe in Santa Claus, right, Dad?
Scott Calvin : I did? I do!
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Charlie : [about Neil] I learn a lot from him. He listens to me.
Scott Calvin : Yeah, then he charges you for it.
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Scott Calvin : Whoa! This could be a really long night.
Charlie : Do it again Dad, please?
Scott Calvin : [picks up the bag] I can't, the thing's empty.
[Comet the reindeer gets angry and growls]
Scott Calvin : There's nothing in the bag. Even if there was, did you notice there is no chimney? Where there's no chimney, there's no fireplace.
Scott Calvin : [Comet growls] Are you growling at me?
Scott Calvin : [Comet nods his head] Look, Comet, like I said there is nothing left...
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Charlie : Whoa, how did you do that? How did that feel, Dad?
Scott Calvin : It felt like "America's Most Wanted".
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Charlie : [to his father, Scott] What do you mean you don't know? Of course you are, Dad. How can you say that? Think about those kids!
Scott Calvin : The only kid I'm thinking about is you.
Charlie : Dad, I'm fine. You can't let *them* down. They all believe in you.
Dr. Neil Miller : Charlie, listen...
Charlie : YOU listen! You think you know what he is? You *DON'T*!
Laura : Charlie - honey, listen. You're confused.
Charlie : I know *exactly* who he is.
Dr. Neil Miller : [firmly] Charlie... He is NOT Santa!
Charlie : [whining; desperate] HE IS TOO SANTA! We went to the North Pole together. I saw it! The elves are real old even though they look like me. Bernard called me sport, 'cause he knew everything.
[turns to Scott]
Charlie : Right, Dad?
[Scott looks unsure]
Charlie : [tossing him the snow globe Bernard gave him] REMEMBER!
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Charlie : How do reindeer fly? They don't have any wings.
Scott Calvin : [matter-of-factly] Fairy dust.
Charlie : That's from "Peter Pan", Dad.
Scott Calvin : Horns.
Charlie : Antlers.
Scott Calvin : Whatever. Their, uh, antlers given them - you know, there's a slipstream effect - the air go - they move fa - they're weightless.
Charlie : But if Santa's so fat, how does he get down the chimneys?
Scott Calvin : He sucks it in like Grandpa.
Charlie : What about people who don't have fireplaces? How does he get into their house?
Scott Calvin : Charlie, sometimes believing in something means you... means you just believe in it. Santa uses reindeer to fly because that's how he has to get around.
Charlie : But you do believe in Santa, right, Dad?
Scott Calvin : [making an uneasy face and nodding slightly] Of course I believe in Santa. Now please go to sleep.
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[last lines]
Scott Calvin : Do you wanna go for a quick ride?
Charlie : Yeah!
Laura : Uh...
Scott Calvin : Of course, it's up to your mom.
Charlie : Please, Mom.
Laura : Go on. Get outta here.
Scott Calvin : All right. Hold on. On our way.
Charlie : Bye, Mom.
Laura : Just-- Just a quick one. And, uh, not over any oceans, Scott.
Charlie : Bye, Mom!
Laura : Scott.
Scott Calvin : Bye.
Laura : Scott! Santa!
[Scott and Charlie fly off into the night]
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Scott Calvin : [about to leave his son for his Santa job forever] Actually, l, I think it's a much better idea... that you stay here with your Mom and Neal.
Charlie : But, Dad...
Scott Calvin : No buts, Charlie. I can't be selfish. I can't be with you all the time. We're a family. You, me, your mom... and Neal. And they need to be with you too.
Charlie : I miss you too much.
Scott Calvin : Come here a minute. Ah, listen to me. Come on, listen. There's-- There's a lot of kids out there. Okay? Millions of kids. And they're-- They all-- They all believe in me. They're countin' on me, Charlie. And l--I'm not gonna let them down. I got a lot of work to do.
Charlie : So I can't be selfish either.
Scott Calvin : You gave me a wonderful gift, Charlie. Listen, a wonderful gift. You believed in me when nobody else did. You helped make me Santa. Selfish? Come on. You're the least-- the least selfish person I know.
Charlie : I love you, Santa Claus.
Scott Calvin : I love you, son.
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Bernard : [witnessing Scott and Charlie's breakup] What's all this boo-hooing goin' on here? Hey, how ya doin'?
Scott Calvin : It's nothin', Bernard. I'm just saying goodbye to Charlie.
Bernard : What goodbye? Charlie, you still got the glass ball, right?
Charlie : Yeah.
Bernard : Well, all you gotta do... is shake it whenever you want to see your dad.
Charlie : Really?
Bernard : He can come back to see you... anytime day or night. Hey, have I ever steered ya wrong?
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Scott Calvin : Reindeer up on the roof... Santa suit laying on the ground... Guy fell... not my fault... Reindeer on the roof... THAT is hard to explain...
Charlie : It's the ladder.
[Scott turns and bumps into the ladder]
Scott Calvin : [referring to ladder] Where the hell this come from?
-
Charlie : [after reading "The Night Before Christmas" to Charlie, he turns off the light and turns to leave when Charlie interrupts him] What's that?
Scott Calvin : [leaning back in the doorway] What's what?
Charlie : A Rose Suchak ladder?
Scott Calvin : It's not a ladder, I said "arose such a *clatter*". It means, eh, "came a big noise".
Charlie : What?
Scott Calvin : [turning Charlie's light back on] Charlie, "arose" is a word that means "it came", and a clatter is a big noise.
[talks faster]
Scott Calvin : Now please go to sleep, shut your eyes.
