Revenge of the Nerds IV: Nerds in Love (1994 TV Movie)

Corinne Bohrer: Jeanie Humphrey

Photos 

Quotes 

• Jeanie Humphrey : To hell with my father!

  Dudley Dawson : I was hoping you'd say that!

• Betty Skolnick : Hey. What's Trevor Gulf doing?

  Jeanie Humphrey : [startled]  I-I think he's mooning us.

  Lewis Skolnick : That's no moon, thats the San Joquin valley

  [shouts, running at Trevor as people began to react off-screen] 

  Lewis Skolnick : TREVOR, NO!

  Takashi : [takes photo of Trevor's mooning]  Oh! Big Smile!

• Jeanie Humphrey : I love Booger! And I'm gonna marry him, no matter WHAT you say!

  Tippy : Jeanie!

  [to Aaron] 

  Tippy : What did you say to her?

  Aaron Humphrey : Nothing, I just made a suggestion.

  Tippy : Oh, can't we all just get along?

  Aaron Humphrey : She comes up with a guy who looks like he came out of a vending machine and I'M the one who's wrong!

• Jeanie Humphrey : [to Heidi]  You gave up what you wanted to tell the truth, I admire that quality in a person.

• Jeanie Humphrey : It's on!

  Lewis Skolnick , Betty Skolnick : What's on?

  Jeanie Humphrey : The wedding!

• Jeanie Humphrey : I'm sure my mother's just overwhelmed by the wedding and everything.

  Dudley Dawson : Oh, then you don't think it's because they hate my guts?

  Jeanie Humphrey : Booger, I love you!

  Dudley Dawson : Yeah, I know *you* do, but I'm not sure about your parents.

• Jeanie Humphrey : I love you, Booger.

  Dudley Dawson : Oh, I love you, too.

  Jeanie Humphrey : But marriage is about trust, no secrets from each other, remember?

  Dudley Dawson : I don't have any secrets.

  Jeanie Humphrey : Well, what about that child in Sandusky, Ohio?

  Dudley Dawson : I don't have a child in Sandusky, Ohio!

  Jeanie Humphrey : Well, why would Detective Penrod say that you did?

  Dudley Dawson : Well, I don't know! I don't even know who Detective Penrod is! I'm a condemned man and I don't have a child!

  Jeanie Humphrey : I believe you, Booger.

  Dudley Dawson : You do?

  Jeanie Humphrey : Yes, because marriage is about trust, and I trust you completely.

  [laughs] 

  Dudley Dawson : All I know is that I love you and I think we should continue the wedding.

  Jeanie Humphrey : Oh Booger, I don't know what to do. I don't know - I tell you - what's wrong or right anymore.

  Dudley Dawson : I, uh... I know it's a day early, but... I'd like you to read my valentine.

  [Jeanie giggles] 

  Dudley Dawson : Open it up.

  Jeanie Humphrey : [reads from the card]  Ahem, "An empty spot was on my heart, until I met you, O Valentine. Then the spot filled in, my heart was whole, I could love for the first time in my life, now that you are going to become... my wife." Ah, the hell with my dad!

  Dudley Dawson : Oh, that's exactly what I hoped you'd say!

  [Jeanie starts laughing and lowing like a cow] 

  Dudley Dawson : Again.

  [Jeanie continues to make a lowing sound] 

  Dudley Dawson : Ho ho ho ho ho, oh I can't tell you what it does to me to hear you moo again! Moooo!

  Jeanie Humphrey : Oh, Booger!

  Dudley Dawson : Jeanie!

  [Booger and Jeanie share a joyous embrace while lowing and mooing] 

• Lewis Skolnick : Now what was going on?

  Lamar : Well, Chip was crackin' on Booger's parents.

  Dudley Dawson : Crackin' on my parents?

  [pause] 

  Dudley Dawson : What kind of cracks, Chip?

  Lewis Skolnick : [apprehensively]  Booger.

  Unknown : Yeah, what kind?

  Lewis Skolnick : Booger, as your best man, I strongly advise you to just let it go.

  Dudley Dawson : I'm not going to let it go.

  Lewis Skolnick : On the other hand, I'm prepared to explore other avenues with you as well.

  Dudley Dawson : What kind of cracks, Chip?

  [Chip stammers nervously] 

  Lamar : Chip said that your mama was so ugly, that the Elephant Man paid to see her.

  [Ogre laughs out loud, then silences himself] 

  Chip : The point is, you have a 12-year old daughter in Sandusky, Ohio!

  Dudley Dawson : This has nothing to do with my having a child in Sandusky, Ohio. That isn't what this is about at all.

  [pause] 

  Dudley Dawson : This is because I'm a nerd...

  [the crowd gasps] 

  Dudley Dawson : and it has been since the beginning.

  Lamar : Mm-hmm.

  Dudley Dawson : Why else would someone rummage through my private life with a detective? And then, announce this... detestable fabrication, this - this tissue of lies on the happiest day of my life?

  Jeanie Humphrey : Oh, Booger.

  Dudley Dawson : Hath not a nerd eyes? When you prick us, do we not bleed? I am tired of the reckless allegations, the snide snickering, the talking behind backs, the sly innuendoes, the looking down on us! We are what we are, aren't we?

  Everybody : Yeah, we are!

  Dudley Dawson : And we're proud of what we are.

  Everybody : Yeah, we are!

  Dudley Dawson : And we are not about to allow ourselves to be intimidated by a bunch of...

  Lewis Skolnick : Booger! Don't say it!

  Ogre : Say it, Booger!

  Dudley Dawson : Nouveau-riche pigs!

  Ogre : There you go!

  Aaron Humphrey : You have... the audacity... to utter... the most... morally reprehensible slur to these... fine, upstanding... self-made businesspeople! Shame on you, Booger! Shame on all of you nerds.

• Lewis Skolnick : Booger, every wedding has its crisis, this is yours.

  Dudley Dawson : A crisis would be easy compared to this.

  [looks up to the balcony] 

  Dudley Dawson : Jeanie!

  Jeanie Humphrey : [sadly]  Oh, Booger.

  Lewis Skolnick : [Jeanie goes back into her bedroom]  Booger, the groom never stops pursuing his bride.

  [Lewis puts his arm around Betty] 

  Lewis Skolnick : Never.

• Jeanie Humphrey : [uses the pond scooper as a pole vault, and grunts as he climbs Jeanie's balcony rail]  Booger.

  Dudley Dawson : Darling! Whoa!

  [Booger stumbles over the balcony rail] 

  Dudley Dawson : So what if I have a child?

  Jeanie Humphrey : I'm so confused, you know, I don't know what to think anymore!

  Dudley Dawson : Oh, marry me, Jeanie!

  Jeanie Humphrey : I- I just need a few days to think about it.

  Dudley Dawson : And not get married on Valentine's Day?

  Jeanie Humphrey : I'm confused, Booger, I need time!

  Dudley Dawson : There was a time when getting married on Valentine's Day was... the most important thing in the world to us.

  Jeanie Humphrey : [sighs]  Please go, Booger.

  Dudley Dawson : Is that what you really want?

  Jeanie Humphrey : [fighting back the tears]  No,not in my heart and... not in my soul, but I'm just so nuts over this, you know. It's like I just need a little space... Please, Booger?

  Dudley Dawson : [Booger gives a rose to Jeanie, starts to sing softly]  Jean, Jean / The roses are red /

  Jeanie Humphrey : [starts singing]  All the leaves have gone green /

  Dudley Dawson : And the skies are so low /

  Jeanie Humphrey : You can touch them / And so /

  Dudley Dawson , Jeanie Humphrey : Come into my arms / Bonnie Jean.

  [Booger and Jeanie briefly embrace, falling back onto the bed, giggling] 

  Jeanie Humphrey : [goes to the balcony]  It's on!

  Lewis Skolnick , Betty Skolnick : What's on?

  Jeanie Humphrey : The wedding! Whoo-hoo!

  [Jeanie tosses a rose down from the balcony] 

• Dudley Dawson : Hey, hey, hey, don't go.

  Jeanie Humphrey : [Heidi sighs]  What would you say if I said we should adopt Heidi?

  Dudley Dawson : I would say that I love you even more than I already do, and I didn't think that was possible.

  Jeanie Humphrey : [to Heidi]  You gave up what you wanted to tell the truth, I really admire that quality in a person.

  [Heidi, Dudley,and Jeanie have a group hug] 

• Mr. Skolnick : I see before me two souls who desire to be joined together. There's no greater challenge in life, and also no greater reward.

  Mr. Skolnick : [Mr. Skolnick guffaws; U.N. Jefferson, Ogre, and Travis cry for joy]  Do you, Dudley Dawson, take this woman, Jean Lagarde Humphrey, to be your lawful wife?

  Dudley Dawson : [to Jean]  Before I answer that, I just want to say... this is the happiest moment of my life.

  Dudley Dawson : [faces Mr. Skolnick]  I do.

  Mr. Skolnick : And do you, Jean Lagarde Humphrey, take this man, Dudley Dawson, to be your lawfully wedded husband?

  Jeanie Humphrey : Excuse me.

  [Jeanie turns to Dudley] 

  Jeanie Humphrey : I'm going to love you till the end of time.

  [faces Mr. Skolnick] 

  Jeanie Humphrey : I do.

  Mr. Skolnick : Then, with the power invested in me by the Tilhoon Institute of Home Learning Church, I now pronounce you husband and wife.

  [Mr. Skolnick guffaws; the wedding guests applaud] 

  Mylan Whitfield : [Dudley and Jeanie have a celebratory kiss]  Nerds forever! Forever nerds!

  [Mylan stands up] 

  Mylan Whitfield : Nerds! Nerds!

  Mylan Whitfield , Everybody : Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds!