Greedy (1994)

Ed Begley Jr.: Carl

Photos 

Quotes 

• Nora McTeague : Carl I want a girl, honey.

  Carl : OK after he's dead we'll have a girl I promise.

• Patti : Carl... Carl, what happened? Is he...?

  Carl : Massive coronary. He died instantly.

  Patti : Really? You mean just...?

  Carl : And he left everything to you, sis.

  Patti : Really?

  Carl : No, it wasn't even him. It was Dr. Hemmel.

  Ed : You son of a bitch.

  Carl : Ooh, you really wish it was the old man in the ambulance, don't you?

  Ed : I did before, but now I wish it was you.

  Carl : How are your girls, Ed?

  Patti : That's right, we have girls. You know why? Because we weren't cynical and cold-blooded enough to put Ed's sperm in a centrifuge and spin it around to separate the X's from the Y's! Excuse me, brother, but no matter how much uncle Joe is worth, there is a line below which we will not go. Jolene? Joette? Let's go in, girls.

• Carl : Do we know if they're sleeping together? Is there proof?

  Laura : I need more time.

  Glen : They're humping too quick to get pictures. Let's get a better detective!

• Carl : [Referring to Danny]  He double crossed us.

  Daniel McTeague : [to his dad]  Because they're scum. I mean they're greedy.

  Frank : We're greedy? We were willing to share!

• Joe : [Uncle Joe gets in elevator]  Why don't we just cut the cable?

  Nora McTeague : Sssshhhhh.

  Carl : It's too thick.

• Douglas : Your Uncle had some congestion, he was coughing most of the night sir.

  Carl : What kind of cough? Was it dry or liquidy?

  Douglas : It was just a cough sir. Next time I'll save you a sample.