The Great Outdoors (1988) Poster

John Candy: Chet Ripley

Photos 

Quotes 

  • [Chet is being pulled by the boat on water-skies at high speed] 

    Chet : You bastard! You bastard!

    Roman : I think he's saying go faster.

  • Bartender : He's been struck by lightning... how many times has it been now, Reg?

    Reg : S-s-s-s-s-s-s-six...

    Chet : Six times?

    Reg : S-s-s-six-six-six-six-six-six-sixty-sixty-six times. In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n-In-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n the head!

    Chet : Sixty six times? God, that's gotta hurt.

  • Chet : Bear... bear... Big Bear... big bear chase meeeeeeee...!

  • Roman : I think we should go into town tomorrow and pick up a ski boat. Whaddya say? Sound good, guys? Uncle Roman'll blow some coin on a kick-ass drag boat!

    Chet : That's OK, we're renting a pontoon boat.

    Roman : Pontoon boat? What the hell are you gonna do with a pontoon boat? Retake Omaha Beach?

  • [Chet is telling everyone about his bear story] 

    Chet : So when you go to bed tonight, and you hear a noise, whatever you do, don't look out the window...

    [Chet shouts while he tosses some of his alcoholic beverage into the fireplace causing a huge fireball shooting out of the chimney] 

    Chet : because there might be a bear!

  • Chet : He's the oldest man in Canada, kids. Isn't that something?

    Roman : Well, personally, I'd rather see a 46-inch bust singing "Burnin' Love."

  • Roman : There's no mystery here, Chet. I know how you really feel about me.

    Chet : Do you?

    Roman : Yeah, and I knew that if I was ever to give you something, you figure there'd be strings attached.

    Chet : Is that a fact?

    Roman : Yeah, that's a fact. At our wedding, you were in the john, Kate and Connie's dad. You were talking. Do you happen to remember the substance of that conversation?

    Chet : No I don't.

    Roman : Well, I do, and it's one I'll never forget. I heard you say - and I quote - "that Roman Craig is a crooked son of a bitch". Next time you stab somebody in the back, Chester, you better check under the stalls for feet. You may think I'm made out of armor and nails, man, but when I get cut, it hurts. That cut me, and I hurt.

    Chet : Roman, I'm really sorry. I had a lot to drink that night. I really don't remember saying that, but if you said I did, then I must have. I apologize to you both. It was a terrible thing to say.

    Roman : Look, I don't hold grudges, and I don't have any hard feelings. To show you I'm the type of guy who can forgive and forget, well, I'd still like to offer you a piece of that investment.

  • Kate Craig : Ahh!

    [Kate and Roman run out of their bedroom] 

    Roman : What?

    Kate Craig : It touched me!

    Roman : It's been touching you for 12 years, you never freak!

    Kate Craig : Not you!

    [Kate hits Roman on the arm] 

    Kate Craig : A thing.

    Roman : What thing?

    Chet : [Comes out of his bedroom, along with the rest of the family, and turns on the lights]  What's going on?

    Kate Craig : That thing!

    [Points to a bat] 

    Roman : Oh, it's just a little sparrow.

    Kate Craig : C'mon Roman, it's got ears!

    Buck Ripley : Jesus!

    [Everyone screams and runs out of the cabin] 

  • [Chet and Roman are arguing] 

    Chet : You've got an awful lot of nerve, Roman, a lot of nerve.

    Roman : It's served me well, I'm the one with the Mercedes.

    Chet : By the way, is it paid for?

    Roman : Are you jealous? Chester!

    Chet : Don't call me Chester! Call me that one more time and you're gonna go home with a dent in your forehead!

    Kate Craig : Oh yeah, that'll be the day!

    Chet : Would you like one to match his?

    Roman : [raising his fists]  Hey, take it easy! You wanna go right now?

    Buck Ripley : [breaking them apart]  Dad, dad, dad. No one's denting anybody.

    Roman : Thanks, Bucky.

    Buck Ripley : Oh, bite the big one, Uncle Roman!

    Connie Ripley : Hey, don't talk to adults that way!

    Buck Ripley : Why not?

    Roman : Because it's rude.

    Connie Ripley : Oh, blow it out your ass!

  • Chet : Great its yogi and boo boo in the flesh.

  • Chet : I would like to blow Uncle Roman out *my* ass.

  • Roman : [the family are all seated in the cabin's living room and Roman notices Chet at the fireplace]  Now, what are you up to?

    Chet : [irritably]  What does it look like I'm up to?

    Roman : Well, it looks like you're wanking your crank.

    Chet : I'm trying to get a fire going, all right?

    Roman : Well, you might as well pour ice cubes in there. You're never gonna get a fire going that way. You don't crumple a newspaper up.

    [making jerking motions] 

    Roman : You twist it! Twist it! Lengthwise to stimulate kindling. That's how you get it going.

    Chet : [annoyed]  Maybe, Roman, just maybe, I'm trying to heat the flue.

    Roman : [to the others, sarcastically]  Oh, he's heating the flue. Meanwhile, the human beings in the room are freezing to death.

    Connie Ripley : [spiteful]  I'm not really cold. Not at all.

    Kate Craig : [sarcastic, to Connie]  Oh, thank you for sharing that. Thank you.

    Chet : [mockingly]  I'm SO sorry, Roman, forgive me. Why don't you come over here and show me how it's done? You talk a great game. Come on, let's see a little action. After all, you know everything. You know exactly what to do at any given moment.

    Roman : [insulted, to Kate]  Katie, you were absolutely right. We should have gone to Europe or maybe even Haiti, or Antartica, or the Dead Sea! Would've had a LOT more fun!

    [gets up and walks to the other side of the room] 

    Chet : Is that a fact? Well, nobody forced you to come up HERE, buddy boy. In fact, I don't remember anyone inviting you up here.

    [to Connie] 

    Chet : Do you remember inviting him? I sure as hell don't.

    Roman : [walking towards Chet]  And what exactly is that statement supposed to mean?

    Chet : You figure it out for yourself.

    Roman : No, no, you specify, you clarify Just as a common courtesy, if you don't mind.

    Roman : [to Roman, without looking up from her sewing]  You know damn well what he means.

    Connie Ripley : I think what they're trying to say that we're not welcome!

    Chet : [sarcastic]  Oh-ho, what did I hear? We've got a bingo! You DID figure it out, Kate!

    Roman : [sneers]  So, it's all starting to finally ooze out. It's very interesting, though, isn't it, Katie?

    Roman : Yeah, VERY!

    Roman : Especially, since we threw aside OUR plans, and we had a great European vacation planned, threw aside OUR plans to come up here to show these dead-asses how to start learning to have a good time! Thanks a lot for ruining my vacation, Ripley.

    Chet : [while trying to light a match, he breaks it in anger]  What WAS that? Ruining your vacation, is that what you said? Oh, come on, I DON'T believe, I don't believe I heard you say THAT.

    Chet : [jabs his finger to Chet's chest]  You'd BETTER believe it!

    Chet : [jabbing his finger hard into Roman's chest]  DON'T PUSH IT, ROMAN!

    Chet : You ain't even seen PUSHING yet! You know what the trouble is with you, Ripley? You wouldn't know a good time if it fell out of the sky, landed on your face, and started to wiggle!

    Roman : [seething]  Oh, you got an awful lot of nerve, Roman. A lot of nerve.

    Roman : Serves me well. I'M the one with the Mercedes.

    Roman : [egging Roman on]  Oh! Ah!

    Chet : By the way, is it paid for?

    Roman : Are you jealous, CHESTER?

    Chet : [jabs his finger into Roman's chest]  DON'T call me Chester! You call me that one more time, you'll be going home with a dent in your forehead!

    Kate Craig : [stands up to join Roman]  Oh-ho, yeah, that'll be the day!

    Kate Craig : [to Kate]  Would you like one to match his?

    Roman : [outraged]  Hey, take your hands off her!

    [puts up his fists] 

    Roman : YOU WANT TO GO, RIGHT NOW?

    Buck Ripley : [steps in to separate them]  Dad, Dad, it's okay. Nobody's denting anybody.

    Roman : Thanks, Bucky.

    Buck Ripley : [takes off his scarf and throws into Roman's hands]  Oh, bite the big one, Uncle Roman!

    Connie Ripley : [to Buck, scolding]  Hey, don't talk to adults that way!

    Buck Ripley : [to Connie]  Why not?

    Roman : [to Buck]  BECAUSE it's rude!

  • Kate Craig : [during a big row]  Roman, why don't we just get out of here, come on honey. Come on girls, let's go!

    Roman : Good idea.

    [they go upstairs] 

    Chet : Well, it's the first good idea you've had since you've been here. And by the way, don't steal any of our stuff.

    Kate Craig : Ha ha, what stuff is there to steal?

    Connie Ripley : We got stuff!

  • Roman : [Chet, Roman, and the kids are out fishing and are putting bait on their hooks]  These are the biggest worms I have ever encountered.

    Chet : They're not worms, they're leeches.

  • Chet : You'll have to excuse my brother-in-law. He gets a couple of cocktails in him and he becomes an expert on everything.

    Roman : I don't need cocktails for that. Was that a shot?

    Chet : No, that was the truth.

    Roman : Oh, that was a shot!

    Chet : That... was a shot.

    Roman : [to the bartender]  Speaking of shots, set us up!

  • Chet : If you meet any friends, bring them back and we'll give them a ride in "Suck My Wake."

  • Chet : [Bangs his car door on a tree]  Whoa! Trees in the parking lot.

  • Chet : what it means what is means is i would like to blow uncle roman out my ass thats what it means.

  • Chet : Well, easy money is money easily lost.

  • Connie Ripley : I just don't feel like this. Can you understand that. I'm tired, I'm stinky.

    Chet : Come on.

    Connie Ripley : What are you doing? Come on.

    Chet : Come on. We got the house by ourselves.

    Connie Ripley : What about the kids?

    Chet : What *about* the kids? They're down the lake.

    Connie Ripley : I don't - let's go to the bedroom then.

    Chet : Why? That's the great thing about being in the North Woods. You can run around naked as a bear and not worry about running into anybody.

    Connie Ripley : Is that right?

    Chet : Yes.

    [kiss] 

    Connie Ripley : Really?

    [kiss] 

    Chet : Do you think it's possible that we could play - fashion parade?

    Connie Ripley : I don't want to play.

    Chet : Why?

    Connie Ripley : You get to wear the good outfits.

    Chet : Oh, no. I'll let you wear them.

    Connie Ripley : You will?

    Chet : Now, ah, you will be Shelana. Shelana, yes. And I will be Burt. Or I could be Smokey's cousin Horny.

    [unsnaps Connie's bra] 

    Connie Ripley : He has endurance too.

    Chet : Yes, he does. Mmm...

    Roman : [walking in with Kate and their twin daughters]  Anybody home?

  • Roman : I was picking my moment.

    Chet : You were picking your nose.

  • Chet : Roman there you're children for god shakes be there father for the first in your life be there father. now get in there and help you're kids.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs


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