Me and some friends found a copy of this in a local video store, renting it was 3$ but we bought it for 2$ instead, that was promising, they really wanted to get rid of it. Anyway we were looking for the worst movie available to laugh and we found it. Zombie vs Ninja guess who wins? NOBODY they never fight There are two horrible plots in this movie, two groups of ninjas, the ninjas and nin jas, and for some reason they are fighting, gold or something, really doesn't make sense. And the one that is apparently the good guy, not because of what he does but because he is better and braver. He fights with the dragons fire burns hot crap style. Anyway, in this part of the story nothing really happens. this guy whats through the woods and somehow doesn't notice the bright yellow and blue dressed guys hiding in the woods. they attack him but you know there is always a sword somewhere on a tree right, so he picks it up and wins. In the second plot, this guy, Ethan, has a father that was robbed and killed so he wants revenge and learns kungfu from an undertaker, go figure. Anyway this undertaker always extends his lines in a successful attempt to sound retarded, and says lines like, i have to go take a s~t and summons 1 or 2 zombies, hardly a horde. The only way you can distinguish the zombies from the humans is that they act like robots, dommo arigato mr zombie. And guess what the good guys win and yatti yatta, bad plot nothing happens. But the image is the worst, we noticed the image skip (when they stop filming and restart later from that point) around 4 times in the movie. Most of the time the actors aren't on screen since they cut off most of their faces when they switched it to full screen. WHY THE HECK DRESS IN SHINY FLASHY CLOTHING LABLED NINJA IF YOU WANT TO SURPRISE SOMEONE TO ASSASSINATE HIM! WHY FIGHT ZOMBIES FOR FUN OR LEARN KUNGFU FROM AN UNDERTAKER? WHY Doesn't THE NINJAS AND ZOMBIES FIGHT? Horrible but funny if you watch it in a group. If you have ever seen kung pow this is probably the movie they were laughing at since the mouths never move with the words
15 Reviews
Zombie trainer vs. the other movie
Zeegrade15 May 2009
Zombie Vs. Ninja ranks up there with "I Eat your Skin" as far as misleading movie titles are concerned. At no point whatsoever is there any combat between said opponents. As a matter of fact both the Zombies and the Ninjas appear to be in two separate movies pasted together into one Godfrey Ho clusterf......film.
The bulk of the movie concerns a man named Ethan who is beaten up during a robbery of family gold which ultimately leads to the death of his father. The thieves work for the typical kung-fu badguy here named Titus. After mistakenly thought for dead an undertaker/kung fu master (I know! Who would of thought!) accepts Ethan as his apprentice. The undertaker, called simply Master T, I think, employs an unusual style of training as he can summon zombies in order to sharpen his kung-fu skills. The story follows the standard kung-fu checklist as eventually Ethan becomes adept enough to fight his father's killers. Where the Ninjas fit in is another story.
Ethan's storyline seems to come from the movie called "Gravedigger". The Ninjas are filmed separately from the main movie and come in the form of a bunch of Caucasian men with very Asian sounding names like Duncan, Bob, Ian and Bert. Leading the way is Godfrey Ho weapon of choice Pierre Kirby as the Dragon. It is beyond asinine to watch Kirby pretend to talk to Ethan and Master T when the backgrounds behind him don't even begin to match. The sheer goofiness of the Ninja outfits complete with "NINJA" headbands and gaudy outfits make you feel sorry for these guys rather than be in awe of them. Nothing screams badass ninja like yellow undergarments. Watching all of these white guys prance around a forest preserve role playing ninja vs. ninja made me think I was watching a corporate getaway to promote "team players". It's just beyond bizarre to watch.
The bulk of the movie concerns a man named Ethan who is beaten up during a robbery of family gold which ultimately leads to the death of his father. The thieves work for the typical kung-fu badguy here named Titus. After mistakenly thought for dead an undertaker/kung fu master (I know! Who would of thought!) accepts Ethan as his apprentice. The undertaker, called simply Master T, I think, employs an unusual style of training as he can summon zombies in order to sharpen his kung-fu skills. The story follows the standard kung-fu checklist as eventually Ethan becomes adept enough to fight his father's killers. Where the Ninjas fit in is another story.
Ethan's storyline seems to come from the movie called "Gravedigger". The Ninjas are filmed separately from the main movie and come in the form of a bunch of Caucasian men with very Asian sounding names like Duncan, Bob, Ian and Bert. Leading the way is Godfrey Ho weapon of choice Pierre Kirby as the Dragon. It is beyond asinine to watch Kirby pretend to talk to Ethan and Master T when the backgrounds behind him don't even begin to match. The sheer goofiness of the Ninja outfits complete with "NINJA" headbands and gaudy outfits make you feel sorry for these guys rather than be in awe of them. Nothing screams badass ninja like yellow undergarments. Watching all of these white guys prance around a forest preserve role playing ninja vs. ninja made me think I was watching a corporate getaway to promote "team players". It's just beyond bizarre to watch.
The Worst?
chris-25124 July 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I can't believe they credited this movie to Godfrey Ho. Now Ho is not exactly a great auteur, but if I was him, I'd sue for defamation. Half of this movie is an actual (probably terrible) Hong Kong kung-fu flick, the rest is comprised of footage that looks like it was shot somewhere in Utah with costumes that came from the dollar store. Did I mention all of this footage is shot on a consumer level VHS camcorder? The white Caucasion ninjas are, as others have pointed out, literally dressed in garbage bags, and not good ones either. The best is when characters from the Hong Kong film are cut to look as if they're interacting with the Caucasions. The reaction shots are priceless.
Imagine Redneck Zombies, Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker or A Night to Dismember, then take yourself WAAAYYY down a couple of hundred notches and you're still not even close to imagining how unbelievably poor this movie is.
Zombie Vs. Ninja: Guess who wins? Not the viewer that's for sure.
Imagine Redneck Zombies, Mulva: Zombie Ass Kicker or A Night to Dismember, then take yourself WAAAYYY down a couple of hundred notches and you're still not even close to imagining how unbelievably poor this movie is.
Zombie Vs. Ninja: Guess who wins? Not the viewer that's for sure.
Oh...my....god....
kolchak2527 January 2002
I picked up a copy of this movie as I love zombie movies and ninja movies. With a title like Zombie vs Ninja, naturally I expected to see combat between zombies and ninjas. I expected this even more so after reading the description on the box which made a statement about the doors of hell being open unleashing a "zombie horde." Wow!
Imagine my horror to discover that this film is actually a composite of 1)a film about an undertaker, who happens to be able to teach his young apprentice kung fu skills, and 2)scenes that appear to have been shot for the only purpose of being inserted into this film to incorporate "ninjas" into the storyline.
The actors in the zombie story and the ninja story never appear on screen together. However, an attempt is made to make us believe they are in the same story as closeups of the actors are intercut to make it appear as if they are talking to each other.
The "zombie horde" is certainly an overstatement as we never see more than three or four zombies at once. The master keeps calling them up to train the young apprentice in kung fu skills, surely a questionable method of training at best.
The "ninjas" are probably the most hilarious thing I have ever seen. They are caucasians who wear shiny, brightly colored ninja outfits, and have names like Bert, Bob, and Ira. Uhhhh.... not exactly what you expect froma ninja movie. Their costumes appear to be made of plastic and are white, yellow, and blue, which really should make them quite visible in the forest.
The funniest thing about the ninja characters is that they wear headbands that say "ninja" or "nin ja" with japanese writing in between the two syllables. What sort of ninja - arguably the most deadly invisible assassins - wear headbands that announce who they are?! I believe they were labeled as otherwise no one watching the film would ever know they were supposed to be ninjas as their outfits do not look anything like any other ninja costume I've seen in any movie.
Also, there are two ninja forces in the film, but it is not readily apparent. I kept wondering why they were fighting and killing their own friends, until the two ninja leaders fought at which point I realized that up until then I had thought they were the same guy. I believe that the two styles of ninja headbands - "ninja" and "nin ja" were used to differentiate the two bands of ninjas.
While this has to be seen to be appreciated, the movie is really bad, but not bad enough to be enjoyable. Watch at your own risk. If you are easily confused, I advise you to stay away.
Imagine my horror to discover that this film is actually a composite of 1)a film about an undertaker, who happens to be able to teach his young apprentice kung fu skills, and 2)scenes that appear to have been shot for the only purpose of being inserted into this film to incorporate "ninjas" into the storyline.
The actors in the zombie story and the ninja story never appear on screen together. However, an attempt is made to make us believe they are in the same story as closeups of the actors are intercut to make it appear as if they are talking to each other.
The "zombie horde" is certainly an overstatement as we never see more than three or four zombies at once. The master keeps calling them up to train the young apprentice in kung fu skills, surely a questionable method of training at best.
The "ninjas" are probably the most hilarious thing I have ever seen. They are caucasians who wear shiny, brightly colored ninja outfits, and have names like Bert, Bob, and Ira. Uhhhh.... not exactly what you expect froma ninja movie. Their costumes appear to be made of plastic and are white, yellow, and blue, which really should make them quite visible in the forest.
The funniest thing about the ninja characters is that they wear headbands that say "ninja" or "nin ja" with japanese writing in between the two syllables. What sort of ninja - arguably the most deadly invisible assassins - wear headbands that announce who they are?! I believe they were labeled as otherwise no one watching the film would ever know they were supposed to be ninjas as their outfits do not look anything like any other ninja costume I've seen in any movie.
Also, there are two ninja forces in the film, but it is not readily apparent. I kept wondering why they were fighting and killing their own friends, until the two ninja leaders fought at which point I realized that up until then I had thought they were the same guy. I believe that the two styles of ninja headbands - "ninja" and "nin ja" were used to differentiate the two bands of ninjas.
While this has to be seen to be appreciated, the movie is really bad, but not bad enough to be enjoyable. Watch at your own risk. If you are easily confused, I advise you to stay away.
Time Warp
El Ambre17 March 1999
Zombie vs Ninja is such a powerful piece of cinema that it somehow created a time warp around my living room and made it seem as if the movie took 4 hours to watch. The acting, editing, garbage bag ninja costumes were all terrible. The movie stunk to high heaven, and caused me to regrettably lose an hour and a half of my life. I'll never regain that time back and I am worse off as a human being for viewing the movie.
Horrible . . .
beetree14 March 2001
A friend of mine and I went on a mission to find the worse movie of all time. After we watched this movie, we did not even bother to put in the other movies we rented.
A plot summary, character break down, or comments on the directing and acting would be useless. Only see this movie if to want to see something that is truly bad.
Also, do not make a mistake by thinking that this movie is bad in the way of the classic bad movies like, "Plan 9 From Outer Space". . . Zombie vs Ninja is just plain cut you eyes out, tear off your ears, smash your VCR, horrible. I am glad that this movie is not available to corrupt the DVD market.
A plot summary, character break down, or comments on the directing and acting would be useless. Only see this movie if to want to see something that is truly bad.
Also, do not make a mistake by thinking that this movie is bad in the way of the classic bad movies like, "Plan 9 From Outer Space". . . Zombie vs Ninja is just plain cut you eyes out, tear off your ears, smash your VCR, horrible. I am glad that this movie is not available to corrupt the DVD market.
The collision of old and new footage is dreadful. Look for the original film before its improvements instead
dbborroughs11 November 2008
Warning: Spoilers
Godfrey Ho clip job film where new footage of white guys wearing head bands that say "ninja" on them are inter-cut with footage from what looks to be a decent kung fu film. The footage never matches and the resulting story makes no sense. Its a shame that Godfrey Ho has had his clip job films become more readily available to film viewers in the West since most of the films that he's cut up and rearranged were actually pretty good films to begin with. Since its hard to track down the full version of the film people are going to think that the stinkers are the way things really are. As for me I just try to avoid anything by Ho since if I see his name in the credits I know its awful.
What a weird movie
natt-231 January 2005
Warning: Spoilers
I am left perplexed after this movie. It was a weird experience ... First, let me state that I have seen much worse movies (Hercules in New York jumps to mind) ... after all, this was a ninja movie and it had some good fighting in it. Having said that, I can't help but wonder what the hell they were thinking? Why was the ninjas dressed up with bright yellow suits and headbands saying "NINJA"? What was the relationship between the bad guy killed in the last two minutes and Titus? Was there two separate villains? What were the zombies good for? Why were they included? Why did the master have to look like a rabbit with those teeth? Overall, I gave this a 3 out of 10 just because I am always entertained by Ninjas, apparently no matter how bad they look, and I like the attempt at an original story with the undertaker twist.
In the end this is not a movie I would recommend to anyone else but a true ninja freak...
In the end this is not a movie I would recommend to anyone else but a true ninja freak...
Painfully bad
hellholehorror21 December 2022
This feels like seven uncompleted movies cobbled together into another one. There is no reasoning with anything that makes up any tiny segment. It just drags along between boring stories and fighting for pointless and asinine reasons. The outfits are bad, the dubbing awful and the cameraman work rubbish. This was made for no money and made badly even for no money. If you want to see something that was made really badly and then reviewed really badly then look no further. If you are in the mood for something good then avoid at all costs. Not even funny - just bad. This makes kung-fu look really bad and unimaginative. The whole thing looks like it was made in two weeks from conception to completion. Totally devoid of merit. This never gets better than the rather stupid trailer. Painfully bad and totally devoid of merit. Utterly worthless.
the stuff of legend
herschelj_krustofsky19 January 2007
While I agree with a lot of comments on this movie (YES it's bad, YES it's spliced together and somewhat baffling), it IS most certainly watchable. It is not 'gouge-your-eyes-out bad'. If you're a fan of old Kung fu movies, and have a sense of humour, you will probably love it. Whatever vintage Kung fu movie is featured in "Zombie Rival" it's actually pretty good, I'd like to track it down. Those scenes are enjoyable. But the newer (presumably 1980's) ninja scenes are also enjoyable - comedy gold. The outfits. The headbands. The mustaches. The dialogue.. in between sword clashes they say things like "I told you... the dragon's fire burns HOT!" Here in the UK you can get this on DVD for Five Pounds or less, under the title "Zombie Rivals". I own it on oldschool big-box rental VHS, under the title "Zombie Rival: The Super Ninja Master". The video cover has a painting of a barbarian on the front. Seriously. A barbarian.
Update: The vintage Kung Fu movie is called "Gravedigger". Yay!
Update: The vintage Kung Fu movie is called "Gravedigger". Yay!
More Godfrey Ho, demented ninja shenanigans!
HaemovoreRex2 July 2005
Warning: Spoilers
Viewers searching for thought provoking and quality entertainment had better look away now, for this is yet another of Godfrey Ho's legendary ninja flicks from the nineteen eighties!
Yes, it's another one of those crazy cut and splice outings in which western actors dressed in luminous ninja togs look somewhat baffled to find themselves edited into completely non-ninja related movies whilst their voices are bizarrely over dubbed with unfathomable accents!
'Zombie vs Ninja'....hmmmmm.....The title of this movie may evoke exciting visions of brave ninja battling it out with legions of George Romero's walking dead.....but hold on - this is Godfrey Ho at the helm here and so you just know that your expectations are not exactly going to be met!
Sure enough and true to usual crap-tacular form, at no point in this movie does our man Ho deliver ninja and zombies actually slugging it out (or even actually meeting for that matter!!!)
The zombie segments in this are from a completely separate kung fu movie in which an old necromancer utilises the risen dead as a bizarre but highly efficacious training aid! The story details how Ethan, the necromancers student, learns devastating martial arts in the aforementioned manner in order to exact revenge upon the miscreants who murdered his family. It has to be said that the martial arts choreography on display here in this story is excellent, especially the climatic fight which showcases some old Shaw Brothers style action.
The ninja segments also revolve around another tale of revenge and are, as usual in these films, tremendously fun.
However the very best bit in the movie is a line of dialogue from the zombie segment in which the zombie master decides to reanimate a corpse to test Ethan's developing combative prowess. The necromancer makes the excuse that he needs to defecate and goes and crouches in a ditch where he begins his magical incantations. However, unbeknown to him, Ethan spies him squatting down making what appear to be exaggerated 'straining' noises and subsequently utters what has to be one of the most hilarious lines in movie history! If you've ever seen this film then I'm sure you'll remember the line as it's not likely that once heard you'll ever forget it!
Yes, it's another one of those crazy cut and splice outings in which western actors dressed in luminous ninja togs look somewhat baffled to find themselves edited into completely non-ninja related movies whilst their voices are bizarrely over dubbed with unfathomable accents!
'Zombie vs Ninja'....hmmmmm.....The title of this movie may evoke exciting visions of brave ninja battling it out with legions of George Romero's walking dead.....but hold on - this is Godfrey Ho at the helm here and so you just know that your expectations are not exactly going to be met!
Sure enough and true to usual crap-tacular form, at no point in this movie does our man Ho deliver ninja and zombies actually slugging it out (or even actually meeting for that matter!!!)
The zombie segments in this are from a completely separate kung fu movie in which an old necromancer utilises the risen dead as a bizarre but highly efficacious training aid! The story details how Ethan, the necromancers student, learns devastating martial arts in the aforementioned manner in order to exact revenge upon the miscreants who murdered his family. It has to be said that the martial arts choreography on display here in this story is excellent, especially the climatic fight which showcases some old Shaw Brothers style action.
The ninja segments also revolve around another tale of revenge and are, as usual in these films, tremendously fun.
However the very best bit in the movie is a line of dialogue from the zombie segment in which the zombie master decides to reanimate a corpse to test Ethan's developing combative prowess. The necromancer makes the excuse that he needs to defecate and goes and crouches in a ditch where he begins his magical incantations. However, unbeknown to him, Ethan spies him squatting down making what appear to be exaggerated 'straining' noises and subsequently utters what has to be one of the most hilarious lines in movie history! If you've ever seen this film then I'm sure you'll remember the line as it's not likely that once heard you'll ever forget it!
Pure cinematic genius
pancakelizard30 March 2001
Zombie versus ninja is one of the few great hidden gems in the world of cinema today. It exceeds any expectations you may have going into a movie that is called zombie versus ninja. IF YOU ARE A FAN OF KIROSAWA, FELLINI, OR KUBRICK, then thats good for you I am too, but what was I saying about ninja versus zombie is that it is a great work and has single handedly changed the way we think about ninja zombie movies. The influence of this timeless masterpiece is abundantly obvious in such works as ninja zombie gangbangers, gold(to be released later this year), and many of the works of legendary director Grover Cleavland. If you don't like this movie it is because you simply aren't smart enough to understand it.
Magnificent..
benhume197227 February 2019
One of the greatest old skool kung fu movies ..
Unfortunately theres a silly 1980s american trash ninja movie melted into the original kung fu film ..
Wish i knew what the original kung fu movie is .. Its priceless .. Ten out of ten
Unfortunately theres a silly 1980s american trash ninja movie melted into the original kung fu film ..
Wish i knew what the original kung fu movie is .. Its priceless .. Ten out of ten
Important to know: "Zombie vs. Ninja" aka. "Zombie Rival the Ninja Super Master".
Ducks_foot9 December 2005
Excellent fights, the speed and the coordination of the last fights could rival some of those made by Bruce lee. Although the sense of humour in this movie at times is pretty grotesque, it was for me an interesting relief, from some of the lame standards of the general American action movie, which in my eyes are often a little bit to self glorifying. The "forest" ninja movie: Well, a couple of good scenes, but still not nearly as the skillful kung-fu of the "undertaker"! One wonders why anyone would think, it was a good idea too add this second movie within the movie (consequently cutting out some most likely very interesting parts of the Asian movie). The "forest" ninja story is of course pretty hard to follow, because it's difficult to distinguish between the outfits of the actors. This I could read that Kolchak25 had some problems with. The way to distinguish the rivalling sides in the "forest" is NOT by looking whether the head bands spell "ninja" or "nin ja", since the supposedly evil side both wear bands with "ninja" and "nin ja". For example the right hand of the evil ninja boss (which fights our ninja hero the second last fight in the forest-part) wears a band which spells "ninja" as do our hero. The only way to tell apart is to look at the colour of the head bands. The good guy is the only one who wears the orange colour band. This is very important to know if you are to make any sense of this movie.
If you can find this movie cheap or rent it somehow, please do!
tarbosh2200012 October 2012
Warning: Spoilers
Ethan is a mild-mannered guy just minding his own business - until one day his father is murdered by a gang of baddies and his gold is stolen. Ethan ends up meeting a man named Master T, a coffin maker and undertaker, who agrees to take him under his wing as an apprentice. He then trains him in the ways of Martial Arts so he can get revenge on his father's killers. But he does this in a pretty unorthodox way - by using the resources at his disposal such as long hikes carrying coffins, digging graves, and fighting zombies to improve his Kung-Fu skills. On the other side of the patchwork, a group of White guys in absurd outfits and headbands are going after a cruel land-grabber named Titus and his backer named Mason. Thankfully there's a hero named Duncan (Kirby) who has stellar fighting abilities. Will any of this fit together and make any sense whatsoever? Find out today! Here we have another Godfrey Ho patchwork concoction. You really can't judge his movies by the same standard you judge other movies. They come from a singular and incredibly wacky world of their own. Keeping this in mind, despite what some wags on the internet think, we tend to like Mr. Ho's oeuvre - but it's not for everyone because you have to have a high tolerance for insanity and nonsensicality. If you take your logical hat off for about 90 minutes or so, there is enjoyment to be had.
For instance, while there are some standard chop-socky elements at work here, at least every 10 minutes or so, something weird, wild and wacky happens. Whether it comes from the funny dubbing, nutty sound effects, the toothy Master T and his in-and-out Jay Leno impression, the sped-up footage, the intentional "humor" or the cadre of White guys in flashy ninja gear, there's always something to keep your interest, no matter how incoherent the final product may be. And sure, there are characters named Lin and Tiger, but how many movies have a ninja master named Ira? Or Duncan for that matter. And why do they all have mustaches and headbands proclaiming that they are "Ninja"s or in some cases simply just "Nin"? Since the movie went back and forth between the "White Ninjas" plot and the "Undertaker" plot, we much preferred the White Ninjas side of the quilt and it was always a bit disappointing when it went to the other side. And there's some killer music to, in theory, tie it all together.
Seeing as movies like this must surely have limited appeal, we applaud Imperial Home Video for releasing this. But if they ever were going to take a gamble, surely it would be in the golden year of 1989. Video stores were booming, ninjas were booming, zombies were booming, everything was booming. All they had to do was sit back and let the demented mind of Godfrey Ho work its magic. All that being said, this epic probably isn't worth the current $100.00 asking price on Amazon.
Godfrey Ho fans: you know who you are. If you can find this movie cheap or rent it somehow, please do. Everyone else: this would be as good a place to start as any with the work of Mr. Ho, but confusion will certainly reign. In the end, movies like this, if nothing else, further cement the truth that the 80's ruled.
For more action insanity, drop by: www.comeuppancereviews.com
For instance, while there are some standard chop-socky elements at work here, at least every 10 minutes or so, something weird, wild and wacky happens. Whether it comes from the funny dubbing, nutty sound effects, the toothy Master T and his in-and-out Jay Leno impression, the sped-up footage, the intentional "humor" or the cadre of White guys in flashy ninja gear, there's always something to keep your interest, no matter how incoherent the final product may be. And sure, there are characters named Lin and Tiger, but how many movies have a ninja master named Ira? Or Duncan for that matter. And why do they all have mustaches and headbands proclaiming that they are "Ninja"s or in some cases simply just "Nin"? Since the movie went back and forth between the "White Ninjas" plot and the "Undertaker" plot, we much preferred the White Ninjas side of the quilt and it was always a bit disappointing when it went to the other side. And there's some killer music to, in theory, tie it all together.
Seeing as movies like this must surely have limited appeal, we applaud Imperial Home Video for releasing this. But if they ever were going to take a gamble, surely it would be in the golden year of 1989. Video stores were booming, ninjas were booming, zombies were booming, everything was booming. All they had to do was sit back and let the demented mind of Godfrey Ho work its magic. All that being said, this epic probably isn't worth the current $100.00 asking price on Amazon.
Godfrey Ho fans: you know who you are. If you can find this movie cheap or rent it somehow, please do. Everyone else: this would be as good a place to start as any with the work of Mr. Ho, but confusion will certainly reign. In the end, movies like this, if nothing else, further cement the truth that the 80's ruled.
For more action insanity, drop by: www.comeuppancereviews.com
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