The Breakfast Club (1985)

Emilio Estevez: Andrew Clark

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Quotes 

• Andrew Clark : We're all pretty bizarre. Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all.

• [last lines] 

  Brian Johnson : [closing narration]  Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us - in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...

  Andrew Clark : ...and an athlete...

  Allison Reynolds : ...and a basket case...

  Claire Standish : ...a princess...

  John Bender : ...and a criminal.

  Brian Johnson : Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.

• Andrew Clark : What do you need a fake I.D. for?

  Brian Johnson : So I can vote.

• Allison Reynolds : I'll do anything sexual. I don't need a million dollars to do it either.

  Claire Standish : You're lying.

  Allison Reynolds : I already have. I've done just about everything there is except a few things that are illegal. I'm a nymphomaniac.

  Claire Standish : Lie.

  Brian Johnson : Are your parents aware of this?

  Allison Reynolds : The only person I told was my shrink.

  Andrew Clark : And what did he do when you told him?

  Allison Reynolds : He nailed me.

  Claire Standish : Very nice.

  Allison Reynolds : I don't think that from a legal standpoint what he did can be construed as rape, since I paid him.

  Claire Standish : He's an adult.

  Allison Reynolds : Yeah, he's married too.

  Claire Standish : Do you have any idea how completely gross that is?

  Allison Reynolds : Well, the first few times...

  Claire Standish : The first few times? You mean you did it more than once?

  Allison Reynolds : Sure.

  Claire Standish : Are you crazy?

  Brian Johnson : Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing a shrink.

  Allison Reynolds : Have you ever done it?

  Claire Standish : I don't even have a psychiatrist.

  Allison Reynolds : Have you ever done it with a normal person?

  Claire Standish : Didn't we already cover this?

  John Bender : You never answered the question.

  Claire Standish : Look, I'm not going to discuss my private life with total strangers.

  Allison Reynolds : It's kind of a double edged sword isn't it?

  Claire Standish : A what?

  Allison Reynolds : Well, if you say you haven't, you're a prude. If you say you have you're a slut. It's a trap. You want to but you can't, and when you do you wish you didn't, right?

  Claire Standish : Wrong.

  Allison Reynolds : Or are you a tease?

  Andrew Clark : She's a tease.

  Claire Standish : I'm sure. Why don't you just forget it.

  Andrew Clark : Oh, you're a tease and you know it. All girls are teases.

  John Bender : She's only a tease if what she does gets you hot.

  Claire Standish : I don't do anything.

  Allison Reynolds : That's why you're a tease.

  Claire Standish : OK, let me ask you a few questions.

  Allison Reynolds : I already told you everything.

  Claire Standish : No. Doesn't it bother you to sleep around without being in love. I mean, don't you want any respect?

  Allison Reynolds : I don't screw to get respect. That's the difference between you and me.

  Claire Standish : It's not the only difference I hope.

  John Bender : Face it, you're a tease.

  Claire Standish : I'm NOT a tease.

  John Bender : Sure you are. Sex is your weapon. You said it yourself. You use it to get respect.

  Claire Standish : No, I never said that she twisted my words around.

  John Bender : What do you use it for then?

  Claire Standish : I don't use it period.

  John Bender : Oh, are you medically frigid or is it psychological?

  Claire Standish : I didn't mean it that way. You guys are putting words into my mouth.

  John Bender : Well, if you'd just answer the question.

  Brian Johnson : Why don't you just answer the question?

  Andrew Clark : Be honest.

  John Bender : No big deal.

  Brian Johnson : Yeah answer it.

  Andrew Clark : Answer the question, Claire.

  John Bender : Talk to us. Every one: C'mon, answer the question. Come on. Answer it.

  John Bender : C'mon, it's easy. It's only one question.

  Claire Standish : NO I NEVER DID IT.

  Allison Reynolds : I never did it either. I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar.

• Claire Standish : You know why guys like you knock everything?

  John Bender : Oh, this should be stunning.

  Claire Standish : It's because you're afraid.

  John Bender : Oh God, you richies are so smart, that's exactly why I'm not heavy into activities.

  Claire Standish : You're a big coward.

  Brian Johnson : I'm in the math club.

  Claire Standish : See, you're afraid that they won't take you, you don't belong, so you have to just dump all over it.

  John Bender : Well, it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes, now would it?

  Claire Standish : Well, you wouldn't know, you don't even know any of us.

  John Bender : Well, I don't know any lepers either, but I'm not going to run out and join one of their fucking clubs.

  Andrew Clark : Hey! Let's watch the mouth, huh?

  Brian Johnson : I'm in the physics club too.

  John Bender : Excuse me a sec. What are you babbling about?

  Brian Johnson : Well, what I had said was I'm in the math club, uh, the Latin, and the physics club... physics club.

  John Bender : Hey, Cherry. Do you belong to the physics club?

  Claire Standish : That's an academic club.

  John Bender : So?

  Claire Standish : So academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs.

  John Bender : Ah... but to dorks like him, they are. What do you guys do in your club?

  Brian Johnson : Well, in physics we... we talk about physics, properties of physics.

  John Bender : So it's sorta social, demented and sad, but social. Right?

• Andrew Clark : I taped Larry Lester's buns together.

  Brian Johnson : That was you?

  Andrew Clark : Yeah, you know him?

  Brian Johnson : Yeah, I know him.

  Andrew Clark : Well, then you know how hairy he is. And when they pulled the tape off, most of his hair came off and some - some skin, too.

  Claire Standish : Oh my God.

  Andrew Clark : And the bizarre thing is that I did it for my old man. I tortured this poor kid because I wanted him to think that I was cool. He's always going off about how when he was in school and all the wild things he used to do. And I got the feeling that he was disappointed that I never cut loose on anyone, right? So I'm sitting in the locker room and I'm taping up my knee, and Larry's undressing a couple lockers down from me. And he's kinda, he's kinda skinny. Weak. And I started thinkin' about my father, and his attitude about, about weakness. And the next thing I knew, I jumped on top of him and started whaling on him. And my friends, they just laughed and cheered me on. And afterwards, when I'm sitting in Vernon's office, all I could think about was Larry's father and Larry having to go home and explain what happened to him. And the humiliation - the fucking humiliation he must have felt. It must have been unreal. I mean, how... how do you apologize for something like that? There's no way. It's all because of me and my old man. God, I fucking hate him. He's like this mindless machine that I can't even relate to anymore.

  [crying, imitating his father] 

  Andrew Clark : 'Andrew! You've got to be number one! I won't tolerate any losers in this family! Your intensity is for shit! Win! Win! Win!' You son of a bitch. You know, sometimes I wish my knee would give. And I wouldn't be able to wrestle anymore. And he could forget all about me.

• John Bender : Uh, Dick? Excuse me; Rich. Will milk be made available to us?

  Andrew Clark : We're extremely thirsty, sir.

  Claire Standish : I have a really low tolerance for dehydration.

  Andrew Clark : I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross.

• John Bender : [after Claire performs her lipstick trick, claps sarcastically]  Wow, Claire. That was great. My image of you is totally blown.

  Allison Reynolds : You're a shit. Don't do that to her, you swore to God you wouldn't laugh.

  John Bender : Am I laughing?

  Andrew Clark : [shouts angrily]  You fuckin' prick!

  John Bender : What do you care what I think anyway? I don't even count, right? I could disappear forever and it wouldn't make any difference. I might as well not even exist at this school, remember?

  [turns to Claire] 

  John Bender : And you... don't like me anyway.

  Claire Standish : You know, I have just as, many feelings as you do and it hurts so much when someone steps all over them.

  John Bender : God! You're so pathetic. Don't you ever, *ever* compare yourself to me, okay. You got everything, and I got shit. Fuckin' Rapunzel, right? School would probably fuckin' shut down if you didn't show up. Queenie isn't here. I like those earrings, Claire.

  Claire Standish : Shut up.

  John Bender : Are those real diamonds Claire?

  Claire Standish : Shut up.

  John Bender : I bet they are. Did you work for the money for those earrings?

  Claire Standish : Shut your mouth.

  John Bender : Or did your daddy buy those for you?

  Claire Standish : [shouts]  SHUT UP!

  John Bender : I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. Right? You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." All right? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?

  Andrew Clark : My God, are we gonna be like our parents?

  Claire Standish : Not me. Ever.

  [Bender nods] 

  Allison Reynolds : It's unavoidable. It just happens.

• John Bender : Sporto.

  Andrew Clark : What?

  John Bender : You get along with your parents?

  Andrew Clark : Well, if I say yes I'm an idiot, right?

  John Bender : You're an idiot anyway. But if you say you get along with your parents, well, you're a liar too.

• Andrew Clark : Why do you have to insult everybody?

  John Bender : I'm being honest, asshole. I would expect you to know the difference.

• Allison Reynolds : You have problems.

  Andrew Clark : Oh, I have problems?

  Allison Reynolds : You do everything everyone tells you to do and that is a problem.

  Andrew Clark : Okay, fine, but I didn't dump my purse out on the couch and invite everyone into my problems.

• Andrew Clark : So what's wrong? What is it? Is it bad? Real bad? Parents?

  Allison Reynolds : Yeah.

  Andrew Clark : What did they do to you?

  Allison Reynolds : They ignore me.

  Andrew Clark : Yeah.

• John Bender : [crawling above the ceiling]  A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm, and a two-foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. The bartender says, "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." Naked lady says...

  [the ceiling breaks, and he falls through] 

  John Bender : Oh, *shit*!

  Richard Vernon : [hearing the crash from his office]  Jesus Christ Almighty!

  [John sees Andrew and Claire angrily stunned] 

  John Bender : [to the other students]  Forgot my pencil.

  Richard Vernon : [enters the library]  Goddamn it! What in God's name is going on in here? What was that ruckus?

  Andrew Clark : Uh, what ruckus?

  Richard Vernon : I was just in my office and I heard a ruckus.

  Brian Johnson : Could you describe the ruckus, sir?

  Richard Vernon : Watch your tongue, young man, watch it.

• Andrew Clark : Speak for yourself.

  John Bender : Do you think I'd speak for you? I don't even know your language.

• Andrew Clark : Look, you guys keep up your talking and Vernon's gonna come right in here. I got a meet this Saturday and I'm not gonna miss it on account of you boneheads.

  John Bender : Oh, and wouldn't that be a bite, huh? Missing a whole wrestling meet!

  Andrew Clark : You wouldn't know anything about it, faggot! You never competed in your whole life!

  John Bender : Oh, I know. I feel all empty inside because of it. I have such a deep admiration for guys who roll around on the floor with other guys.

  Andrew Clark : Ah, you'd never make it. You don't have any goals.

  John Bender : Oh, but I do!

  Andrew Clark : Yeah?

  John Bender : I wanna be just... like... you. I figure all I need is a lobotomy and some tights!

  Brian Johnson : You wear tights?

  Andrew Clark : No, I don't wear tights. I wear the required uniform.

  Brian Johnson : Tights.

  Andrew Clark : [short pause]  Shut up!

• Andrew : [after Claire has given Allison a makeover]  What happened to you?

  Allison Reynolds : Why? Claire did it... What's wrong?

  Andrew : Nothing's wrong... it's just so different, you know? I can see your face.

  Allison Reynolds : Is that good or bad?

  Andrew : It's good.

• [as Bender prepares to urinate under his desk] 

  Andrew Clark : Hey, you're not urinating in here, man.

  John Bender : Don't talk. Don't talk. It makes it crawl back up.

• Andrew Clark : If I lose my temper you're totaled, man.

  John Bender : Totally?

  Andrew Clark : Totally.

• Andrew Clark : So... what's your poison?

  [Allison says nothing] 

  Andrew Clark : ... Ok, forget I asked.

  Allison Reynolds : Vodka.

  Andrew Clark : Vodka? When do you drink vodka.

  Allison Reynolds : Whenever.

  Andrew Clark : How much?

  Allison Reynolds : Tons.

• Allison Reynolds : Your middle name is Ralph, as in puke, your birth date's March 12th, you're 5'9 and a half, you weigh 130 pounds and your social security number is 049380913.

  Andrew Clark : Wow. Are you psychic?

  Allison Reynolds : No.

  Brian Johnson : Well, would you mind telling me how you know all this about me?

  Allison Reynolds : I stole your wallet.

• Andrew Clark : I said, leave her alone.

  John Bender : You gonna make me?

  Andrew Clark : Yeah.

  John Bender : You and how many of your friends?

  Andrew Clark : Just me. Just you and me. Two hits. Me hitting you. You hitting the floor. Anytime you're ready, pal.

• [John Bender is absently tearing up books] 

  Andrew Clark : That's real intelligent.

  John Bender : You're right. It's wrong to destroy literature. It's such fun to read. And

  [examines title] 

  John Bender : Moe-Lay really pumps my nads.

  Claire Standish : Moliere.

• Andrew Clark : You ask me one more question and I'm beating the shit out of you.

• Claire Standish : He's just doing it to get a rise out of you. Just ignore him.

  John Bender : Sweets. You couldn't ignore me if you tried. So... so. Are you guys like boyfriend-girlfriend? Steady dates? Lovers? Come on, sporto, level with me. Do you slip her the hot beef injection?

  Claire Standish : GO TO HELL!

  Andrew Clark : ENOUGH!

  Richard Vernon : [from his office]  Hey! What's going on in there? Spoiled little pricks.

• Andrew Clark : Just me. Just you and me. Two hits... me hitting you, you hitting the floor. Any time you're ready, pal.

  John Bender : [Bender goes to hit Andrew but Andrew tackles him to the floor]  I don't wanna get into this with you man.

  Andrew Clark : [Andrew lets him go and they both stand up]  Why not?

  John Bender : Cause I'd kill you. It's real simple, I'd kill you and your fucking parents would sue me and it'd be a big mess and I don't care enough about you to bother.

  Andrew Clark : [whispers as he turns around]  Chickenshit.

  [Bender pulls out a switchblade and stabs into a chair] 

  Andrew Clark : Let's end this right now. You don't talk to her... you don't look at her and you don't even think about her! You understand me?

• Andy's Father : Hey, I screwed around. Guys screw around, there's nothin' wrong with that.

  [Andrew nods agreeingly] 

  Andy's Father : Except you got caught, Sport.

  Andrew Clark : Yeah, Mom already wringed me, alright?

  Andy's Father : You wanna miss a match? You wanna blow your ride?

  [Andrew shakes his head no] 

  Andy's Father : No school's gonna give a scholarship to a discipline case!

• Andrew Clark : Yo wastoid, you're not gonna blaze up in here.

• Andrew Clark : I'm not a winner because I want to be one. I'm a winner because I've got strength and speed... kinda like a racehorse. It's about how involved I am in what's happening to me.

• Andrew Clark : [standing up for Claire after she's been bullied by Bender one too many times]  Let's end this right now. You don't talk to her, you don't look at her and you don't even think about her! You understand me?

  John Bender : [nonchalantly]  I'm trying to help her.

• John Bender : Oh, shit! What're we s'posed to do if we have to take a piss?

  Claire Standish : Please.

  John Bender : If you gotta go, you gotta go.

  Claire Standish : Oh my god!

  Andrew Clark : Hey, you're not urinating in here man!

  John Bender : Don't talk, don't talk. It makes it crawl back up.

  Andrew Clark : You whip it out and you're dead before the first drop hits the floor.

  John Bender : You're pretty sexy when you get angry.

• Allison Reynolds : I can write with my toes. I can also eat, brush my teeth

  Claire Standish : With your feet?

  Allison Reynolds : Play "Heart and Soul" on the piano...

  Brian Johnson : I can make spaghetti.

  Claire Standish : What can you do?

  Andrew Clark : I can, tape all of your buns together.

• Richard Vernon : [enters the library before lunchtime]  All right, girls, that's 30 minutes for lunch.

  Andrew Clark : Here?

  Richard Vernon : Here.

  Andrew Clark : Well, I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch in, sir.

  Richard Vernon : [irritably]  Well, I don't really care what you think, Andrew.

  John Bender : [raises his hand]  Dick, uh, excuse me. Rich, will milk be made available to us?

  Claire Standish : [to Vernon]  I have a low tolerance for dehydration.

  Andrew Clark : I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross.

  John Bender : Relax, I'll get it.

  Richard Vernon : [stops him]  Ah-ah-ah! Grab some wood, there, bub. What do you think, I was born yesterday? You think I'm gonna have you roaming these halls?

  [points to Andrew] 

  Richard Vernon : You

  [Andrew willingly points to Claire, but Vernon points to a spaced-out Allison] 

  Richard Vernon : and you. Hey!

  [snaps fingers and turns to the others] 

  Richard Vernon : What's her name? Wake her up. Wake her up. Hey, come on, missy, on your feet, let's go! This is no rest home.

  [Allison stares strangely at Vernon as she stands up] 

  Richard Vernon : There's a soft drink machine in the teacher's lounge. Let's go!

  [the rest of the kids take their time giving Andrew and Allison change] 

  Richard Vernon : Come on, shake your tail feather, let's go, ante up! Some people don't even get a lunch hour. Come on, get a move on!

  Claire Standish : [takes out a $20 bill]  Excuse me, sir, can you break this?

  [Vernon scoffs sarcastically] 

• Claire Standish : [to Bender]  Why don't you shut up? Nobody here is interested.

  Andrew Clark : Really. Butt face.

  John Bender : Hey, sporto, what'd you do to get in here? Forget to wash your jock?

• Brian Johnson : What's the point of going to Bender's locker?

  Andrew Clark : Beats me.

  Brian Johnson : This is so stupid. Why do you think - why are we risking getting caught?

  Andrew Clark : I don't know.

  Brian Johnson : So then what are we doing?

  Andrew Clark : You ask me one more question, and I'm beating the shit out of you.

• Claire Standish : What would I do for a million bucks?

  Andrew Clark : I guess I'd do as little as I had to.

  Claire Standish : That's boring.

  Andrew Clark : How am I supposed to answer?

  Claire Standish : The idea is to, like, search your mind for the absolute limit. Like, would you drive to school naked?

• Andrew Clark : He's got a name.

  John Bender : Yeah?

  Andrew Clark : Yeah. What's your name?

  Brian Johnson : Brian.

  Andrew Clark : See?

  John Bender : My condolences.

• Allison Reynolds : [talking about the contents in Brian's wallet]  Two bucks and a beaver shot.

  Andrew Clark : A what?

  Allison Reynolds : He's got a nudie picture in there. I saw it. It's perverted.

  Andrew Clark : All right. Let's see it.

• Andrew Clark : [to John Bender]  Let's end this right now. You don't talk to her. You don't look at her. And you don't even think about her! You understand me?