- Sydney Kovak: [the opening narration] This tall brunette, born with a silver spoon in her mouth, was private eye Raymond Dashiell Caulfield's first wife.
- Carole Stanwyck: This streetwise blonde and I only have two things in common; with both married the same man -and we both divorced him. We met at the first time... at his funeral. Are you ready this? He left us his mansion - Mortgaged to the hilt. And the Caulfield Detective Agency. How do we manage?
- Sydney Kovak: We call the cops a lot.