This is one of best, funniest movie spoofs I've ever seen. Favorite quote: Mertz: Do you find my method...acting...unsound? Dullard: I saw no acting at all.
13 Reviews
A hilarious, dead-on parody of Apocalypse Now!
Tombo-413 March 1999
THE archetypal movie parody
tpocock4 August 2001
The single best movie parody of all time. This short includes all of the major themes and "quotable quotes" of the movie applied to an absurd topic. It was timely (release within a year of the original movie), well produced and executed, included an actor who had been lost to popular attention (wasn't he dead?), and even included some of the hype surrounding the original. If you view any one movie parody, this is the one. The real question is -- where is it?
I'd be frightened if I wasn't laughing so hard.
StlBlade1 April 2000
The way Ernie catches the whole mood and style with what was probably a super 8 camera and a dull patch of suburbia is amazing. The writing was incredible in the way he turned his bad clichés into almost sensible strings of thought, not to mention the great camera work. We've all heard of stream of consciousness, I guess you'd call this stream of punconsciousness.
Every time I see this, I actually manage to see something new, be it one of the ads that flash by way to fast, or something so obvious you slap yourself for missing it before. The attention to detail is much better than several big budget movies manage, it's too bad that big budget directors aren't required to make at least ONE no-budget film.
One doesn't NEED to see Apocalypse Now to get this movie, (Yet another sign of it's quality) but it would definitely help. I saw this after seeing the original, but I would love to see someone see them in the opposite order and watch their reactions. Although Apocalypse Now has many 'black comedy' moments, seeing Porklips Now first will probably have a very interesting effect on what gets laughed at.
I give this a full 5 stars
Every time I see this, I actually manage to see something new, be it one of the ads that flash by way to fast, or something so obvious you slap yourself for missing it before. The attention to detail is much better than several big budget movies manage, it's too bad that big budget directors aren't required to make at least ONE no-budget film.
One doesn't NEED to see Apocalypse Now to get this movie, (Yet another sign of it's quality) but it would definitely help. I saw this after seeing the original, but I would love to see someone see them in the opposite order and watch their reactions. Although Apocalypse Now has many 'black comedy' moments, seeing Porklips Now first will probably have a very interesting effect on what gets laughed at.
I give this a full 5 stars
Porklips Now ,,, Or Never
rls081229 June 2011
I don't see why folks think this movie is so great. I've seen Apocalypse Now, and I don;t see the humor of this movie at all.
It's an in-your-face movie that relies on not funny visuals, not funny dialog, and not funny concepts.
I was almost falling asleep by the end, seeing nothing amusing the whole time.
"Hardware Wars" was a great spoof, this movie falls flat on it's face.
What "sealed the deal" for me was the ending. What narcotic was the director on? It was not whimsical, not humorous, and not "ironically funny" .
The movie it's self, for me, is forgettable, with nothing special to remember about it.
If you want to see it, there are plenty of online copies you can watch ... never, EVER pay money for this turd !
It's an in-your-face movie that relies on not funny visuals, not funny dialog, and not funny concepts.
I was almost falling asleep by the end, seeing nothing amusing the whole time.
"Hardware Wars" was a great spoof, this movie falls flat on it's face.
What "sealed the deal" for me was the ending. What narcotic was the director on? It was not whimsical, not humorous, and not "ironically funny" .
The movie it's self, for me, is forgettable, with nothing special to remember about it.
If you want to see it, there are plenty of online copies you can watch ... never, EVER pay money for this turd !
Truly Hilarious
dave-4363 July 2004
This truly hilarious take-off of "Apocalypse Now" is as filled with textured background gags as any Kurtzman-Elder page from the old "Mad" (check out the books in the bookcases Fosselius pans across while Mertz reads poetry to Dullard, for example). You might remember Fosselius from the great parody "Hardware Wars" he produced for about 29 cents and which got its first exposure on local Bay Area television fave Bob Wilkins' "Creature Features." Here, Fosselius works with a big budget (at least $1.25!) and the result is this 28-minute epic that zeroes in like a laser on every pretentious absurdity of Coppola's magnum epic. My favorite bit comes at the end when Dullard comes after Mertz with a knife and Fosselius cuts to a meat slicer churning out very thin slices of bologna. Yeah, there's a few dead spots, but well worth seeking out if only for the raspberry it blows directly in Coppola's face. Don't get me wrong - I like "Apocalypse Now" and Coppola, but I just crack up every time I see this. A classic!
This is, without a doubt, the funniest spoof ever.
bryduck23 March 2005
"Hardware Wars" has its moments, but *every* moment in "Porklips Now" works for me. From Billy Gray's uncanny Sheen-like look and sound, to the incredibly and purposefully stupid dialog, to the spot-on Brando take at the end, "Porklips" is a masterpiece. When I first saw this on the original VHS tape that included "Hardware Wars" and "Bambi Meets Godzilla", I was working in a small video store where we were allowed to watch just about anything we wanted. This became a prized screening choice among all of us who had seen "Apocalypse Now", to the extent that we had to restrain ourselves from showing it every day, lest we grow tired of it. That never happened, btw . . . We need a DVD!
Outstanding son, outstanding!
RalphNumbers29 September 2006
"Never get out of the car. Mertz got out of the car. Then he got out of the car business..."
Did you like "Apocalypse Now" ? Then you should love "Porklips Now," probably the greatest no-budget amateur film (the indy hadn't yet been invented) of the '80s. Spot-on parody fantastically directed with truly bizarre performances. Skewers its target in less than 30 minutes with the best Brando impression of all time.
Why the heck isn't this available on DVD (along with director Ernie Fosselius' "Hardware Wars") ? And why didn't Fosselius end up directing feature comedies ?? Your mission is to find this film. And you're not borrowing my raggedy VHS copy.
Did you like "Apocalypse Now" ? Then you should love "Porklips Now," probably the greatest no-budget amateur film (the indy hadn't yet been invented) of the '80s. Spot-on parody fantastically directed with truly bizarre performances. Skewers its target in less than 30 minutes with the best Brando impression of all time.
Why the heck isn't this available on DVD (along with director Ernie Fosselius' "Hardware Wars") ? And why didn't Fosselius end up directing feature comedies ?? Your mission is to find this film. And you're not borrowing my raggedy VHS copy.
Oh, Shut Up!
domino10035 September 2006
Warning: Spoilers
"Porklips Now," the spoof of the classic Coppola film "Apocalypse Now" deserves a look. Dullard (William Gray from "Father Knows Best" fame") is sent on an errand to take care of madman Fred Mertz (Ernie Fosselius, who also put this together)to take care of him (Although the guys that sent him on the errand are hesitant to say what needs to be done with him). Seems that Mertz is selling his meat at incredibly low prices, and the local merchants aren't happy that this is causing their businesses to suffer. Taking a trip to Chinatown, Dullard journeys to meet Mertz. And even when he does meet Mertz, he soon becomes bored: Mertz rambles on and on, eventually causing Dullard to scream "Oh, shut up!" If you liked Fosselius's first endeavor "Hardware Wars," then you would really appreciate this spoof.
Porklips Now!! 2.39 per Pound
karen-75028 April 2007
O....M....G.
Sorry if the above quote was inaccurate as to the price of porklips, but it's been 25 years since I saw the original, on the flip side of "Hardware Wars," by far inferior.
Since then, I've run around saying "Porklips" is THE funniest film ever made. Yep, better than Spinal Tap, in a low-budget kind of way, which Fosselius plays up.
"Apocalypse Now" is the #1 best film ever made, so I guess it'd stand to reason I'd rank Porklips as the #1 funniest film. I wonder of Coppola has ever seen Porklips? Anyway, about 5 years ago I found a VHS copy on ebay, and snatched it up. Took it to a fiend's house, where we literally rolled in the aisles for hours.
"I think that I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree. Dullard? Dullard, are you listening to me?" I called the fiend a month later to get my tape back. "Oops. I taped football over it." *)%*@#)!!! So now I'm on a new quest...If anyone knows where to obtain this, email me! Fred Mertz...Operating beyond any reasonable or sane price controls.
Sorry if the above quote was inaccurate as to the price of porklips, but it's been 25 years since I saw the original, on the flip side of "Hardware Wars," by far inferior.
Since then, I've run around saying "Porklips" is THE funniest film ever made. Yep, better than Spinal Tap, in a low-budget kind of way, which Fosselius plays up.
"Apocalypse Now" is the #1 best film ever made, so I guess it'd stand to reason I'd rank Porklips as the #1 funniest film. I wonder of Coppola has ever seen Porklips? Anyway, about 5 years ago I found a VHS copy on ebay, and snatched it up. Took it to a fiend's house, where we literally rolled in the aisles for hours.
"I think that I shall never see a poem as lovely as a tree. Dullard? Dullard, are you listening to me?" I called the fiend a month later to get my tape back. "Oops. I taped football over it." *)%*@#)!!! So now I'm on a new quest...If anyone knows where to obtain this, email me! Fred Mertz...Operating beyond any reasonable or sane price controls.
Better than "Hardware Wars"... (SPOILERS!)
zardoz1211 November 2002
Warning: Spoilers
...because here Fosselius has taken a Vietnam War film about a Special Forces officer going up a river to terminate a rebel commander and turned it into a San Fransisco crime movie about a Meat Inspector who has been sent by crooked butchers to shut down a cut-rate Chinatown meat market - and "The Foss" matches Coppola's vibe perfectly, so the satire works. Everything in "Apocalypse Now" is mocked or referenced to, like the bandage on Martin Sheen's face, Marlon Brando's unwillingness to be filmed in light and his speechmaking, even the chaotic making of the film and Coppola's inability to find an ending until the last minute. And all this is is three guys in a yellow `63 Oldsmobile convertable on a 4th of July in the late 1970's.
("Porklips Now can be seen with "Hardware Wars" and two other shorts on "Hardware Wars and Other Film Farces", which was released by Warner Home Video twenty years ago.)
("Porklips Now can be seen with "Hardware Wars" and two other shorts on "Hardware Wars and Other Film Farces", which was released by Warner Home Video twenty years ago.)
Best spoof short ever!
nsavage3-121 July 2005
"Porklips Now" has got to be the funniest spoof of a feature film that I've ever seen! One thing that makes it so good is that it stays so close to the original movie (Apocalypse Now). Almost every scene in this short parallels a classic scene from that movie. For example, the one guy who is skate boarding behind the car while holding the rope, is like the guy who was water skiing in Apocalypse Now. Or, the arrow through the head prop, hilarious. This short even captures some of the strange atmosphere from Apocalypse Now. Favorite line at the end of the movie: "Oh Dullard, you slay me".....DULLARD: "Actually, I was just about to do that". Its been a long time since I've seen it, so the dialog might be slightly different, but it was something like that.
Billy Gray is perfect as Dullard. He sort of reminds me of Charlie Sheen with his reactions and facial expressions. The rest of the cast of unknowns also do a very good job.
I'm sure this will make its was onto DVD at some date and time- I just hope its in my lifetime! A friend of mine had it on Betamax way back in the eighties, but it should be on DVD by now.
Billy Gray is perfect as Dullard. He sort of reminds me of Charlie Sheen with his reactions and facial expressions. The rest of the cast of unknowns also do a very good job.
I'm sure this will make its was onto DVD at some date and time- I just hope its in my lifetime! A friend of mine had it on Betamax way back in the eighties, but it should be on DVD by now.
The perfect antidote to the intensity of Apocalypse Now
DPBoe16 December 2006
I saw this in a double feature with the movie it spoofs, Apocalypse Now. After two plus hours of intense and often wrenching imagery, I was very wound up. The perfect-pitch spoof was exactly what I needed to pull me out of the dark place that Apocalypse Now had taken me. It transported me back to reality, or at least California. Perhaps it would not have made such a strong impression if it hadn't been the follow-up to the movie it spoofed. That's hard to say. But my own feeling is that one should not be seen without the other. While I've had the chance to see Apocalypse on occasion since then, I only ever saw Porklips that one time. Of the two films, I dare say I remember it better! A terrific piece of comic material. It deserves more recognition; I'd love to see it again someday!
Better then Apocalypse Now!
connerg-231 July 1999
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