Ice Station Zebra (1968)

Patrick McGoohan: David Jones

Photos 

Quotes 

• David Jones : The Russians put our camera made by *our* German scientists and your film made by *your* German scientists into their satellite made by *their* German scientists.

• Cmdr. Ferraday : It wasn't sealing wax. It wasn't chewing gum. It was epoxy glue. And all of a sudden you know a whole damn lot about submarines.

  David Jones : I know how to wreck them, and I know how to lie, steal, kidnap, counterfeit, suborn and kill. That's my job. I do it with great pride.

• David Jones : Where were you stationed, Captain, before you were picked up in transit?

  Capt. Leslie Anders : Asia

  David Jones : Ah, then you haven't been on the ice before either.

  Capt. Leslie Anders : No, Sir. A bullet goes just as fast up here as it does down there.

  David Jones : Not quite. An insignificant difference, perhaps, but I think you'll find the operational characteristics of the M-16 indicate that a bullet will decelerate as much as 40 feet per second per second faster in these climate conditions. It's denser air, you know.

• Cmdr. Ferraday : There's one thing that cannot happen on board a submarine by accident... is both ends of a torpedo tube open to the sea at the same time!

  David Jones : You cross-connect the hydraulic manifold to the outside door mechanism so that the indicator reads shut when the door is actually open. The same sort of electrical cross on these two panels, and the open position reads green when it should flash red. Then you plug up the inlet to the test cock with chewing gum, sealing wax, anything... just so that it shows a dribble. And then you open the tube, and Good Night.

• David Jones : Those orders come to you from your Chief of Naval Operations, and direct to him from your President, so before we go any further, I suggest that you get me there, put another torpedo up the spout, blow a hole in the ice, and

  [thumping table, shouts] 

  David Jones : get me there!

• David Jones : May I ask, Captain, when we expect to reach the ice barrier?

  Cmdr. Ferraday : Yes, you may ask.

• David Jones : ...and all of a sudden, you know a whole damn lot about my business!

  Cmdr. Ferraday : We don't believe in going on a mission totally blindfolded.

• David Jones : Jones. Bad name. Bad connotations. I once killed a man called Jones. Though not for that reason, of course.

  Cmdr. Ferraday : That's not your name?

  David Jones : Isn't that obvious? It's a - it's a code cover name. Brilliant deception, don't you think? Jones.

• David Jones : People with top security clearances are being hung everyday.

• David Jones : Is it true, Captain, that aboard United States naval vessels, no whiskey is ever served?

  [lights a cigarette] 

  Cmdr. Ferraday : I'm to extend to you every facility, short of endangering the lives of the crew. That could include a pint of medicinal whiskey - if you happen to be seasick.

  David Jones : I am - habitually.

• Boris Vaslov : You have a distrustful character.

  David Jones : I have no character. I assume one.

• Cmdr. Ferraday : Here. Keep this with you. It is a nuclear submarine, as you know. We'll check you from time to time for radiation.

  David Jones : That's very kind of you.

• Cmdr. Ferraday : We have an escort, Mr. Jones.

  David Jones : A Russian trawler?

  Cmdr. Ferraday : The innocent and inevitable - Russian trawler. Just happens to be in our neighborhood.

• [last lines] 

  Col. Ostrovsky : My men and myself will be picked up within the hour.

  Cmdr. Ferraday : And we'll be on our way. We're a long way from home.

  Col. Ostrovsky : We both are, Commander. Do svidaniya.

  David Jones : Until you - meet again.

  Cmdr. Ferraday : Yes - until we meet again.

  David Jones : Do svidaniya.

• David Jones : [Cmdr. Ferraday delivers a requested bottle of whiskey]  This should loosen the old fiddle strings. Would you join me, gentlemen?

• David Jones : There's somebody who doesn't want us to get to Ice Station Zebra.

• David Jones : You better take another look at your orders. I haven't labored the point, so far, because up to now you're doing all that's been required of you. But, the primary objective of this mission is to get *me* to Ice Station Zebra. Those orders come to you from your Chief of Naval Operations and, direct to him, from your President; so, before we go any further, I suggest that you get me there.