The Last Time I Saw Paris (1954)

Walter Pidgeon: James Ellswirth

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Quotes 

• James Ellswirth : Helen tells me that you're a very serious-minded man, hard-working, industrious.

  Charles Wills : Well I try to be sir.

  James Ellswirth : I tell you frankly, these were not the qualities I'd hoped for in a son-in-law. I'll uh, go even further. They're, uh, not the qualities to make Helen happy.

  Charles Wills : Oh, well, sir, I - eh - I'm going to work in a Paris news agency. I'll be surrounded by carefree, irresponsible characters. Some of it is bound to rub off on me.

  James Ellswirth : Hmm. Well, let us hope so.

• James Ellswirth : Helen getting married. Marion getting married. Father abandoned in middle age.

  [Exhales] 

  James Ellswirth : Hmph. What man could ask for more?

• James Ellswirth : Oh, now look, let her alone. After all, I was expelled from Harvard once, and why shouldn't a girl follow in her father's footsteps?

• Charles Wills : I'm peculiar that's why. I used up a year of my life trying to write a book. For some unaccountable reason I thought somebody would want to publish it.

  James Ellswirth : My boy, you're not in the least peculiar. You're merely naive. Now I knew a publisher once and he made it a rule never to read a manuscript. Oh, he'd smell it and weigh it and feel it and taste it. But read it, no. Now if it smelled and felt and tasted like garbage, he'd publish it. Would you like to know the secret of success, my boy? Mediocrity! To be a rich writer, you've got to remember your three "r"s: riches, ruffians and rape.

• James Ellswirth : Your sister has made me very proud. We couldn't tell you the good news before, but Helen has been expelled from the university.

• James Ellswirth : [to Charlie who brought a box of food]  You didn't have to this, my boy.

  Helen Ellswirth : Oh, yes he did. He's trying to make time with me.

• James Ellswirth : Forgive me, but, uh, I'm rather enjoying playing the anxious father. After all, it's Helen's first marriage, you know.

  Charles Wills : Only marriage, sir.

  James Ellswirth : Tut, tut! No arrogance, please.

• Helen Ellswirth : You old fraud! Why didn't you tell us?

  James Ellswirth : I am not old.

• Vicki : Why do grownups drink milk when they have all 32 teeth?

  James Ellswirth : Well, develop butterflies in our stomach and milk seems to quiet them down.

  Vicki : How do they get in your stomach?

  James Ellswirth : They usually hide in the bubbles of champagne.

  Vicki : But...

  James Ellswirth : It's a well-known fact of hydrodynamics.