Romance on the High Seas (1948)

Jack Carson: Peter Virgil

Photos 

Quotes 

• Michael Kent : Are you a good detective?

  Peter Virgil : Naturally, why?

  Michael Kent : Where did you do your traning?

  Peter Virgil : In the army. Intelligence G2.

  Michael Kent : Well how are you at the job?

  Peter Virgil : We won the war didn't we?

• Michael Kent : My wife is leaving day after tomorrow on a South American cruise and, well, she insists on going without me.

  Peter Virgil : Hm. And to a man of your suspicious nature that means only one thing: Another man on the boat.

  Michael Kent : Well, you see, I don't know, but that's what I want you to find out.

  Peter Virgil : Well, you've come to the right man. I have handled so many of these cases.

  [phone rings] 

  Peter Virgil : Excuse me.

  [picks up phone] 

  Peter Virgil : Hello?...Oh yes, how are you?...Well, certainly I shadowed your wife. I hate to tell you this, but you were right, she's been two-timing you.

  [we hear a thud on the other end of the line] 

  Peter Virgil : Hello? Hello?

  [aside to Mr. Kent] 

  Peter Virgil : He fainted.

  [hangs up phone] 

  Peter Virgil : Sometimes there's a shot. Now where were we?

  Michael Kent : Well, Mr. Virgil, I want you to get on the same boat with my wife and shadow her.

  Peter Virgil : Hey now, wait a minute! That means I'll have to leave all of my business!

  Michael Kent : I'll make it up to you.

  Peter Virgil : Well, I can tell you right now without batting an eyelash it'll cost you $1000 a week.

  Michael Kent : Well, that's a little steep, isn't it, old boy?

  Peter Virgil : Yes, yes it is, but, uh, I'll probably get seasick.

  Michael Kent : Well, all right, all right, I'll book your passage.

  Peter Virgil : Hm. Now, uh, move your chair a little closer, will you? There's a little confidential information I must have.

  [phone rings] 

  Peter Virgil : Excuse me.

  [picks up phone] 

  Peter Virgil : Hello?

  [we hear a gunshot on the other end of the line] 

  Peter Virgil : Well, whaddya know? He didn't even wait for me to tell him!

• Peter Virgil : There's something I just gotta do, I cant help myself.

  Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  Well if you cant help yourself, you can't help yourself.

  Peter Virgil : I gotta find the cable-gram.

• Peter Virgil : Look, don't worry. The slogan of my firm is 'Never kiss a client's wife'...

  Michael Kent : Well, don't change slogans in mid-ocean.

• Peter Virgil : Can you explain to me why that man was in your cabin kissing you?

  Georgia Garrett : [pretending to the be Elvira Kent]  No.

  Peter Virgil : Well?

  Georgia Garrett : Well, can you explain why you were watching my cabin?

  Peter Virgil : No.

  Georgia Garrett : Well?

  Peter Virgil : Well, maybe...

  Georgia Garrett : Maybe what?

  Peter Virgil : Well, maybe I'm narrow minded. But I don't like married women who play around with other men.

  Georgia Garrett : Would you feel different if the other man was you?

  Peter Virgil : That's beside the point.

  Georgia Garrett : It is, is it?

  Peter Virgil : Yes, it is. Everything they've ever said about women like you on boats like this with men like me certainly turns out to be true. Or don't you follow me?

  Georgia Garrett : I've wanted to, Peter, anywhere, anytime.

• Peter Virgil : Everything they've ever said about women like you're on boats like this with men like me, certainly turned out to be true. Or don't you follow me?

  [sic] 

• Rio Headwaiter : Why, Mr. Virgil. I thought you went back to the States.

  Peter Virgil : I was going but I didn't.

  Rio Headwaiter : I beg your pardon, sir.

  Peter Virgil : Can I help it if I can't help it?

  Rio Headwaiter : Yes, sir.

• Peter Virgil : I advise you to go to your cabin and get out of your clothes at once.

  Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  I beg your pardon?

  Peter Virgil : Don't go in there. You'll be frightfully embarrassed.

  Georgia Garrett : Embarrassed? Why?

  Peter Virgil : Well, nobody dresses the first night out.

  Georgia Garrett : They don't? Even if it's chilly? This I gotta see.

• Peter Virgil : I'm tired of pretending too. Let's both let our hair down. Let's follow our impulses wherever they lead and make this a real vacation, shall we?

• Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  Frankly, Mr. Virgil, I don't see why you're wasting your time with a married woman when there's so many attractive single girls on board.

  Peter Virgil : Oh, yes, yes. Well, you see, the single girls are looking for husbands, while married women are running away from their husbands. Frankly, I'd rather be with those that are running than with those that are looking.

• Peter Virgil : I'd like to see the rest of your wardrobe... .

  Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  In particular, I have one little item... that's backless, strapless... almost frontless.

• Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  I've always had a secret ambition to be a singer.

  Peter Virgil : Is that so? Most singers have secret ambitions to be society dames.

• Peter Virgil : Who was it, said you can't live with them or without them?

  Oscar Farrar : Probably the same guy who said more truth than poetry and I wouldn't care to meet either of them.

  Peter Virgil : The cause of all human suffering, you know.

  Oscar Farrar : To think that we gave up a perfectly good rib.

  Peter Virgil : And not that they appreciate it.

• Peter Virgil : [singing]  I knew a girl whose kiss was warm, I never thought that it could do me harm, There never was a better girl like her, But her husband was professional wrestler, Oh, run, run, run, When you see a pretty woman, Run, run, run, When you see a pretty woman...

• Peter Virgil : How easy it would be if you weren't married. I'd take you in my arms.

  Georgia Garrett : [pretending to be Elvira Kent]  Like how?

  Peter Virgil : Like this.

  Georgia Garrett : Then what?

  Peter Virgil : On your lips I'd - I'd plant a kiss.

  Georgia Garrett : Such as?

  Peter Virgil : But then, you have a husband.

  Georgia Garrett : And you have principles.

• Peter Virgil : Is yours a blonde too?

  Oscar Farrar : This season. I've loved her as a brunette, a brownette and a redhead. A little peroxide will never come between us.

  Peter Virgil : Speaking about figures, curves...

  Oscar Farrar : Curves?

  Peter Virgil : When you put your arm around her waist, you gotta go into second.

  Oscar Farrar : What color are her eyes?

  Peter Virgil : Well, I never could tell. Every time I look into them I get dizzy.

  Oscar Farrar : My experience, exactly.

  Peter Virgil : Hey, we could be talking about the same girl.

• Peter Virgil : Can I help it if I can't help it?

• Peter Virgil : Well, doctor?

  Ship's doctor : Uh, she'll live, but I can't make any prediction about myself. Would you mind helping me to my cabin?

• Peter Virgil : If I'm over-dressed I might as well overeat.

• Oscar Farrar : [as their plane is about to land in Rio de Janeiro]  Did you ask for tickets to New York?

  Peter Virgil : I certainly did. In my best Spanish, too.

  Oscar Farrar : But the official language of Trinidad is English.

  Peter Virgil : Oh! Do you suppose that had anything to do with it?

• Peter Virgil : Mr. Kent, I didn't know that you were coming down here.

  Michael Kent : After that double-talk telephone conversation, where did you expect me to be?

• Peter Virgil : Well, you see, the single girls are looking for husbands, while the married women are running away from their husbands. And, frankly, I'd rather be with those that are running than with those that are hunting.

• Peter Virgil : I made my fortune in the entertainment business.

  Georgia Garrett : Oh, really?

  Peter Virgil : Mm hmm. I invented a new system for clearing audiences out of theaters.

• Peter Virgil : A fine detective I turned out to be.

  Georgia Garrett : I didn't do so well as a married woman either.

  Peter Virgil : You need practice.