- Ben Jode: President Cleveland's proclamation will be issued any day now and the claims will be filed through the Red Dust land office just like I figured.
- Henchman Clyde Flint: That's what Parker's been telling me.
- Ben Jode: Who's Parker?
- Henchman Clyde Flint: The land agent here.
- Ben Jode: Can we get to him?
- Henchman Clyde Flint: I already got to him. He likes to play roulette. He owes me $6500.
- Ben Jode: So he's been buckin' that crooked wheel of yours, huh?
- Henchman Clyde Flint: [hurt] Oh, Ben. Let's say out of balance... It sounds much nicer.
- Trent Parker: Why that's wholesale claim jumping!
- Ben Jode: Let's dispense with that term, Parker. I prefer to call it land promotion.
- Joe Green: I tell you, Parker, I filed my claim according to regulation. This Matt Johnson's a claim jumper!
- Trent Parker: You say you filed a claim, but I have no record of it in my book, Mr. Green. There it is in black and white. The lot you say is yours is recorded by Mr. Matt Johnson.
- Joe Green: Then this record book don't tell the truth.
- Trent Parker: Are you accusing me of being crooked?
- Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: Ah, let me handle this matter, my friend - I am a lawyer. Yes sir, I will get out a writ of habeus corpuscles. I will nully contender that man Johnson.
- Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: Maybe we're not as half as bad off as we think we are.
- Mrs. Green: We couldn't be any worse off. Why the menfolks haven't even got a vote.
- Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: If we can prove our cases against those claim jumpers, then they will be the illegal residents.
- Chad Stevens: In the meantime, Flint will be running the new county as Sheriff.
- William Hardy: If there were only some way these folks could establish legal residence.
- Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: Oh, yes, but there isn't. I just wrecked, or at least I wracked my brains to think of something. I even read one of my own lawbooks.
- William Hardy: You seem to know a lot about your land laws.
- Chad Stevens: A wandering cowboy picks up a lot of information... most of it's worthless.
- Don Quixote 'Ipso-Fact' Martindale: I tell you, I will take this case to the Supreme Court. Even higher!