- Michael Shayne: Madame, my card!
- Kay Bentley: [reading] Michael Shayne, Private Detective!
- Michael Shayne: Mmmm-hmmm!
- Kay Bentley: Sleeping on your own time now, huh?
- Michael Shayne: Yep! Oh, and meeting a much finer class of thugs!
- Michael Shayne: [after reading a newspaper article] Hey, get this! Here's a guy who's got 26 kids. Must be driven stork mad!
- Kay Bentley: Mike, when I interview him, would it be all right if I mention your name?
- Michael Shayne: Yeah, sure, if you wanna hear some new words.
- Kay Bentley: She's an old schoolmate of mine from grammar school.
- Michael Shayne: I haven't seen any old girls.
- Kay Bentley: Oh, she's not old - about my age.
- Michael Shayne: And still goin' to grammar school? My, she's a little mentally round-shouldered!
- Michael Shayne: [seeing Kay's arm caught in the drop-down berth] Put a torch in your hand and you could pass for the Statue of Liberty.
- Michael Shayne: We can lose ourselves in the Frisco fog and just kick the town around generally.
- Kay Bentley: Oh, Mike, I'd love to, but I've gotta get back to Denver.
- Michael Shayne: Look, just give me two days, and then if I don't put a ring on your finger, I guarantee to put a couple under your eyes.
- Leander: [after discovering a suitcase full of cash] Mmmm-mmmm! Boy, what a crap game I could have with this! Get me behind me, Satan and tie my hands! Lordy, Lordy! Why wasn't I born with a little larceny in my soul?
- Kay Bentley: I think I'll have the #5: the double hamburger with the relish and the hot ketchup, the ground glass and the melted cheese with plenty of onions!
- Brakeman: [alarmed at the speed the train is traveling] If you keep this up, you'll be getting more than a watch! They'll be fittin' you for a wooden suit!
- Traindriver McGowan: And an extra pair of pants for you, squirt!
- Michael Shayne: [seeing the door of his train compartment open] Come in.
- Carl Izzard: Good evening, Mr. Shayne, my name is...
- Michael Shayne: Carl Izzard!
- Carl Izzard: How'd ya know?
- Michael Shayne: I don't know. You just look like a guy who'd have a name like Izzard!