Ninotchka (1939)

Melvyn Douglas: Leon

Photos 

Quotes 

• Ninotchka : I have heard of the arrogant male in capitalistic society. It is having a superior earning power that makes you that way.

  Leon : A Russian! I love Russians! Comrade, I've been fascinated by your five-year plan for the last fifteen years.

  Ninotchka : Your type will soon be extinct.

• Ninotchka : Must you flirt?

  Leon : Well, I don't have to, but I find it natural.

  Ninotchka : Suppress it.

• Ninotchka : We don't have men like you in my country.

  Leon : Thank you.

  Ninotchka : That is why I believe in the future of my country.

• Leon : Ninotchka, it's midnight. One half of Paris is making love to the other half.

  Ninotchka : You merely feel you must put yourself in a romantic mood to add to your exhilaration.

  Leon : I can't possibly think of any better reason.

• Leon : Do you like me just a little bit?

  Ninotchka : Your general appearance is not distasteful.

• Ninotchka : What have you done for mankind?

  Leon : Not so much for mankind... for womankind, my record isn't quite so bleak.

• Leon : A radio's a little box that you buy on the installment plan, and before you tune it in, they tell you there's a new model out.

• Leon : It's midnight. Look at the clock, one hand has met the other hand, they kiss. Isn't that wonderful?

• Leon : A man comes into a restaurant. He sits down at the table. He says, "Waiter, bring me a cup of coffee without cream." Five minutes later the waiter comes back and says, "I'm sorry sir, we have no cream, can it be without milk?"

• Leon : I'll picket your whole country! I'll boycott you! That's what I'll do. No more vodka. No more caviar. No more Tchaikovsky! No more borscht!

• Ninotchka : I am a traitor. When I kissed you, I betrayed a Russian ideal. I should be stood up against the wall.

  Leon : Would that make you any happier?

  Ninotchka : Much happier!

  Leon : All right.

  [Walks Ninotchka over to the wall, puts a blindfold on her and pops open a cork of champagne] 

  Ninotchka : I have paid the penalty. Now, let's have some music!

• Leon : What kind of a girl are you, anyway?

  Ninotchka : Just what you see. A tiny cog in the great wheel of evolution.

  Leon : You're the most adorable cog I've ever seen.

• [Ninotchka is examining a map of Paris] 

  Leon : Pardon me, are you an explorer?

  Ninotchka : No. I'm looking for the Eiffel Tower.

  Leon : Good heavens, is that thing lost again? Oh, are you interested in a view?

  Ninotchka : I'm interested in the Eiffel Tower from a technical standpoint.

  Leon : Technical? No, no, I'm afraid I couldn't be of much help from that angle. You see, a Parisian only goes to the tower in moments of despair to jump off.

  Ninotchka : How long does it take a man to land?

  Leon : Now isn't that too bad? The last time I jumped, I forgot to time it.

• Leon : Ninotchka, tell me, you're so expert on things, can it be that I'm falling in love with you?

  Ninotchka : Why must you bring in wrong values? Love is a romantic designation for a most ordinary biological or, shall we say, chemical process. A lot of nonsense is talked and written about it.

  Leon : Oh, I see. What do you use instead?

  Ninotchka : I acknowledge the existence of a natural impulse - common to all.

  Leon : What can I possibly do to encourage such an impulse in you?

  Ninotchka : You don't have to do a thing. Chemically, we're already quite sympathetic.

• Ninotchka : Let's form our own party.

  Leon : Right. Lovers of the world, unite!

  Ninotchka : And we won't stretch up our arms?

  Leon : No! No-no-no.

  Ninotchka : We won't clinch our fist?

  Leon : No. No.

  Ninotchka : Our salute will be a kiss.

  Leon : Yes. A kiss. Salute!

  [kiss] 

• Leon : I warn you gentlemen, if this case comes to trial, it'll be before a French court. And when the Grand Duchess takes the stand...

  Iranoff : All right, go ahead. Get her on the witness stand. What can she say?

  Leon : Well, how will she look? The fashions this Spring are very becoming to her. Oh, Gentlemen, the judge will be French. The jury will be French. Everybody in the courtroom will be French. Have you ever seen a French court, when a beautiful woman sits in the witness stand and then raises her skirt a little? You sit down and pull up your pants and where would it get you?

• Leon : Your finger, please.

  Ninotchka : Why do you need my finger?

  Leon : It's bad manners to point with your own.

• Ninotchka : So, it's your house?

  Leon : Well, let's say I live in it. It's such a pleasant little place. It has all the comforts. Easy to reach - near the subway, bus and streetcar...

  Ninotchka : Does it mean you want me to go there?

  Leon : Oh, now, please, please, don't misunderstand me.

  Ninotchka : Then, you don't want me to go there?

  Leon : No, no, no, no. No, no. I didn't say that either. Naturally, nothing would please me more.

  Ninotchka : Then, why don't we go? You might be an interesting subject of study.

  Leon : I'll do my best.

• Leon : Good evening, Gaston.

  Gaston : Good evening, Monsieur.

  Ninotchka : Is this what you call the butler?

  Leon : Yes.

  Ninotchka : Good evening, Comrade.

  [shakes Gaston's hand] 

  Ninotchka : This man is very old. You shouldn't make him work.

  Leon : He takes good care of them.

  Ninotchka : He looks sad. Do you whip him?

  Leon : No. But, the mere thought makes my mouth water.

  Ninotchka : A day will come when you'll be free. Go to bed, little father. We want to be alone.

• Leon : You like Scotch stories?

  Ninotchka : Never heard one.

  Leon : Well, two Scotchmen met on the street - and I don't know the name of the street, it doesn't matter anyway - one's name was McGillicuddy. The other one's name was McIntosh. McGillicuddy said to McIntosh, "Hello, Mr McGillicuddy." McGillicuddy, McIntosh said to McGillicuddy, "Hello, Mr. McIn - Mr. McGillicuddy." Then, McGillicuddy says to McIntosh, "How's Mrs. McIntosh?" And McIntosh says to McGillicuddy, "How's Mrs. McGillicuddy?"

  Ninotchka : I wish they'd never met.

• Leon : You can't tell me that you don't look forward to the day when you can come in here, stand square on your two feet and say, "From now on, it's share and share alike."

  Gaston : Emphatically not, sir. The prospect terrifies me. Now, don't misunderstand me, sir. I don't resent your not paying me for the past two months, but the thought that I should split my bank account with you - that you should take half my life's savings - that is really too much for me, sir.

• Ninotchka : It's never too late to change. I used to belong to the petty bourgeoisie, myself.

  Leon : No.

  Ninotchka : My father and mother wanted me to stay and work on the farm. But, I preferred the bayonet.

• Ninotchka : Would you like to see my wound?

  Leon : I'd love to!

• Ninotchka : It's funny to look back. I was brought up on goat's milk, had a ration of vodka in the army, and, now, champagne.

  Leon : From goats to grapes! That's drinking in the right direction.

• Leon : But, darling, we won't have to worry about our future if you're willing to rattle off your past.

• Leon : Did I hear something about jewels?

• Iranoff : I suppose you expect us just to hand over the jewels, huh?

  Leon : Oh, no! No, I'm not a highwayman, just a nuisance.

• Ninotchka : What do we do now?

  Leon : Shall we have some music?

  Ninotchka : Is that customary?

  Leon : It helps. It has ever since King David wooed Bathsheba with his harp. Not being so fortunate as to having my harp at hand, I'll turn on the radio.

• Leon : Where shall we begin?

  Ninotchka : I will start with you.

  Leon : Excellent! Now, let's see, I'm 35 years old, just over six feet tall, and weigh 182 pounds, stripped.

• Leon : Love isn't so simple.

• Leon : Ninotchka, why do doves bill and coo? Why do snails, the coldest of all creatures, circle interminably around each other? Why do moths fly hundreds of miles to find their mates? Why do flowers slowly open their petals? Oh, Ninotchka, Ninotchka, surely you feel some slight symptom of the divine passion? A general warmth in the palms of your hands. A strange heaviness in your limbs. A burning of the lips that isn't thirst, but, something a thousand times more tantalizing, more exulting than thirst.

  Ninotchka : You're very talkative.

  Leon : [Leon kisses Ninotchka]  Was that talkative?

  Ninotchka : No, that was restful. Again.

  [kiss] 

  Ninotchka : Thank you.

• Ninotchka : If you wish to approach me...

  Leon : You know I want to!

  Ninotchka : Then, do it through my lawyer.

• Ninotchka : What are you after?

  Leon : Must one always be after something?

  Ninotchka : Your tactics are useless.

• Leon : Ninotchka, when we first went to my apartment, did I have the slightest idea that you were connected to this deal?

  Ninotchka : You know now. And I know now that you're a man who employs business methods which in Russia would be punished by death.

• Leon : What about life, Ninotchka? Do Russians never think about life? On the moment in which we are living? The only moment we only ever really have.

• Leon : Oh, Ninotchka, don't take things so seriously. Nothings worth it, really.

• Ninotchka : Oh, yes. I know what that is. There's one around here somewhere. It has a little knob that you turn.

  Leon : A little knob, that's right.

  Ninotchka : Yeah, maybe it's in here.

  Leon : It has a little knob.

  Ninotchka : It has a knob, now. Maybe it's in here?

  Leon : It has a little knob.

  Ninotchka : Let's see. There it is! There's the knob.

  Leon : There's the knob!

• Leon : Now, what should we get? The news?

  Ninotchka : No, news. We don't want to know what's happening in the world. We want to be left alone. Don't we?

• Leon : I want to see a friend of mine - a very dear friend. Its a personal matter that has no relation to social philosophies or politics. It's a girl.

  Russian Visa Official : So, it is love which drags you to Moscow.?

  Leon : Yes.

  Russian Visa Official : No visa.

• Ninotchka : Leon, I want to confess.

  Leon : I know - it's the Russian soul.

  Ninotchka : Well, everyone needs to confess. And if they don't confess, they make them confess.

• Ninotchka : And I know now that you're a man who employs business methods which in Russia would be punished by death.

  Leon : Oh, drat, death - aways so glum.

• Leon : You kissed me.

  Ninotchka : I kissed a Polish Lancer too, before he died.

• Leon : Comrade, once you saved your country by going back. This time you can only save it by staying here.