- Jackie'a mother: How's the soup?
- Miss June Crabtree: Oh, it's delicious! Only I'm affraid it's a little too rich for me.
- Jackie'a mother: Oh, I'm sorry.
- Jackie: Tastes like mothballs.
- [Mom kicks Jackie's shin under the table, causing him to swallow a mothball in the soup]
- Jackie: I swollered it!
- Mary Ann: Tastes like Pa's dress suits smell.
- [Mom repeats shin kicking business on Mary]
- Mary Ann: I did too!
- Wheezer: Tastes more like axle grease.
- [Mom pinches Wheezer]
- Wheezer: Owwwwwww! Quit pinching me!
- [Jackie is obsessed with Miss Crabtree and shares a bed with his brother Wheezer]
- Wheezer: I couldn't sleep last night!
- Mary Ann: Couldn't sleep? Why?
- Wheezer: Aw, Jack kept a' huggin' an' a' kissin' me! All night he did!
- Mary Ann: He did?
- Wheezer: Yeah, an' he kept moaning: "I love you, I love you, my darling..."
- [Jackie enters the room]
- Wheezer: HEY, DON'T YOU KISS ME!
- [to his mom]
- Wheezer: Yeah, Jack hugs and kisses me all night! An' he calls me names!
- Jackie'a mother: What kind of names, dear?
- Wheezer: "Precious," and "Sweetheart"... and "Tootsie-Tootsie!"
- Jackie: Gee, I thought our first teacher Miss McGillicuddy was swell, but Miss Crabtree, boy, she's sweller.
- Stymie: [trying anything to get in on the conversation] My Pappy's head's all swelled.
- Mary Ann: Well, what made your Pappy's head swell?
- Stymie: My Mammy hit him on the head wid' a monkey wrench.
- Mary Ann: Did it hurt him?
- Stymie: Don't be silly. How could a monkey wrench hurt your head?
- Chubby: [Chubby is kissing a life-size cutout of Greta Garbo as he quotes from a love letter he got from Wheezer] Oh, my darling, can you hear my pleas in my whispers?
- Echo: [... while Echo/Dorothy repeats what she thinks he's saying] Darling, I hear the fleas in your whiskers.
- Chubby: [he's exasperated, but continues quoting from the letter] If love is like a rose, I will pick my rose in a bud.
- Echo: If love is like a rose, I will pick my nose in the mud.
- Chubby: My heart is filled with joy. I want to trip and dance.
- Echo: My heart is filled with joy. I want to rip my pants.