- [on the closure of Television Centre in 2013] The Corporation claimed changes in technology had rendered many of TV Centre's functions obsolete. For instance, suspicious old men now largely meet children using the Internet.
- Newspapers chiefly exist to spoon-feed the opinions of their readers back to them, much like an arse-to-mouth hosepipe.
- TV can't get enough of Nigel Farage because he adds a bit of colour, which is ironic considering what he represents.
- [on writing advice] Read 'On Writing' by Stephen King and 'On Film-Making' by Alexander Mackendrick. Just try to power through the first draft. it'll be shit, you can rewrite it later (you WILL rewrite it later). Try Scrivener. Once you know what the story line is, write the first draft standing up. You waste less time because it's slightly uncomfortable. Probably loads of other advice but that's off the top of me head.
- [on Donald Trump winning the 2016 US election] As December arrived, the planet grappled with the notion that, despite losing the popular vote by several million, the man who'd bragged about grabbing women by the pussy might get his finger on the red button.
- The Drone flew around with a bunch of mistletoe trying to get couples to kiss and briefly forget the nightmarish dystopian World they were eating Onion Rings in.
- We are all alone, not as alone as a cat in a bin, but alone.
- [on the death of Margaret Thatcher in 2013] In April Margaret Thatcher stopped happening.
- [on The White Lotus (2021)] I have a question about it. There's a scene where somebody does two huge shits. It sparked a debate in my household as to whether that was CGI, or the guy just did a poo. You could definitely do it with CGI, without a shadow of a doubt. But it would be probably $50,000 cheaper just to find someone who would do a poo ... it's somebody squatting in profile around the ankles. And you see, not one but two poos emerge and flop down. I think if that did cost, like $50,000, that's a pretty good use of money for a pivotal moment in your show. That's better than the Death Star exploding.
- [on The Wire (2002)] It was one of the first shows that did things where it didn't hold your hand; it didn't patronise you. You'd see a random scene - the mayor having a chat to his adviser or something - and then the story for that episode would just carry on. And you'd think: what was that about? That was about nothing. I don't understand what was going on there. Then it might pay off in three episodes' time. It was rewarding your attention; it wasn't ambient noise with pictures, which a lot of television can be. It also had that realistic tone to it, where, you know, a lot of the time the problem is they need to get a fucking piece of paper signed by somebody so that they can do the wiretap. But it would take them like four episodes to get the fucking wiretap up and running. Because they have to deal with a load of paperwork, bureaucracy and internal politics. It was frustrating sometimes but it wasn't spoon-feeding you the same stories over and over again. I can't think of many other things that were of that tone and calibre at the time. But all I did was write: "You should be watching this show. It is good," over and over again.
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