Every Horror Film I Can Remember Seeing
This is an ongoing list of horror films that I can remember seeing, updated as I see them (or remember something previously forgotten). Included is a short paragraph or two long review and a 1-5 star rating of each.
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- DirectorWes CravenStarsHeather LangenkampJohnny DeppRobert EnglundTeenager Nancy Thompson must uncover the dark truth concealed by her parents after she and her friends become targets of the spirit of a serial killer with a bladed glove in their dreams, in which if they die, it kills them in real life.What else is there to really say that hasn't been said a million times before? It's a classic and forever will be. Excellent performances, very strong pacing, good effects work and just a truly clever and memorable piece of horror fiction. 4/5 stars.
- DirectorJack SholderStarsRobert EnglundMark PattonKim MyersA teenage boy is haunted in his dreams by deceased child murderer Freddy Krueger, who is out to possess him in order to continue his reign of terror in the real world.Homosexual allegories and theories aside, this film really is pretty mediocre. It has its moment, though, which is probably better than what most say about it...Englund understands Freddy very well and manages to get through this film with dignity intact, which is no small feat. 2/5 stars.
- DirectorChuck RussellStarsHeather LangenkampRobert EnglundCraig WassonA psychiatrist familiar with knife-wielding dream demon Freddy Krueger helps teens at a mental hospital battle the killer who is invading their dreams.This film walks a really great line between outright silly and actually having a sense of weight. Most of the elements work really well: it's a good script built around a simple and straightforward story, characters who can be archetypes without being caricatures and a cast capable of bringing them to life. 3/5 stars.
- DirectorRenny HarlinStarsRobert EnglundRodney EastmanJohn BeckmanFreddy Krueger returns once again to terrorize the dreams of the remaining Dream Warriors, as well as those of a young woman who may be able to defeat him for good.My ultimate guilty pleasure movie. My crush on Andras Jones' hair is well documented among those who know me. Add to that that actress Lisa Wilcox was my very first 13 year old celebrity crush and you have perhaps the most watched film on this entire list. It's simple, it's a little silly, but it's imaginative, visually arresting, and filled with interesting and engaging characters (even if they exist for an absurdly short amount of time), and excellent performances. Plus, it never ceases to make me happy on a personal note. I love this film. 3/5 stars.
- DirectorStephen HopkinsStarsRobert EnglundLisa WilcoxKelly Jo MinterThe pregnant Alice finds Freddy Krueger striking through the sleeping mind of her unborn child, hoping to be reborn into the real world.It's a really rushed film on the page and in the sense of direction: Hopkins handles the effects stuff well, though, and most of the film has some astonishingly excellent visuals. Lisa Wilcox returns, which makes me very happy. 2.5/5 stars.
- DirectorRachel TalalayStarsRobert EnglundLisa ZaneShon GreenblattDream-haunting Freddy Krueger returns once again to prowl the nightmares of Springwood's last surviving teenager, and of a woman whose personal connection to Krueger may mean his doom.Way too silly to be scary, too stupid to be funny...other than the cast seeming pretty damned committed, this movie seems to fail on every conceivable level. There's some good effects work, too, I suppose, though it's undermined by the cartoonish violence and incessant mugging for the camera. And Dream Demons. *beep* dream demons. 2/5 stars.
- DirectorWes CravenStarsHeather LangenkampRobert EnglundJf DavisA demonic force has chosen Freddy Krueger as its portal to the real world. Can Heather Langenkamp play the part of Nancy one last time and trap the evil trying to enter our world?It's very 90's, and that can't be helped, but it really is an incredibly intelligent examination of not just the "Nightmare" series, but of the very essence of fiction. It's ambitious as all hell, and no matter what its failings (and there aren't that many, really), it's pretty successful in that goal. 3.5/5 stars.
- DirectorRonny YuStarsRobert EnglundKen KirzingerKelly RowlandFreddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees return to terrorize the teenagers of Elm Street. Only this time, they're out to get each other, too.Both series are known primarily for excess and insanity, and Freddy Vs.Jason brings both in a big way. The titular characters are well utilized and formed, even if fans might complain that Freddy still isn't "dark" enough(despite his highly pronounced sexual deviancy), with Jason getting more of the characterization(even getting a bit of heroism attached to him in the end, which does work out well enough under the circumstances-compared to Freddy, Jason is a pretty nice guy). It may have benefited from being played a little more straight but, considering it was a miracle that it was even made let alone watchable, it's a pretty solid love-letter to the respective franchises. 3/5 stars.
- DirectorSamuel BayerStarsJackie Earle HaleyRooney MaraKyle GallnerThe spectre of a disfigured man haunts the children of the parents who murdered him, stalking and killing them in their dreams.It's not a great film, but for what it is...well, this isn't so bad a film. I'd argue that it's actually quite good when it's being allowed to do what it wants to, which is be it's own film. The Nightmare sequences, performance ques and dialogue that isn't ripped from the original series mostly are pretty well done. The film does get too "dark" for it's own good, though: too often does it get carried away in trying to be edgy to the point of no longer being any fun whatsoever. Seeing a young woman weep over finding nude photos of her five year old self really isn't the kind of thing a film about a dream monster with knife fingers should probably be about. Between that and awkward fan service moments, things never quite reach the heights they probably should. Still, enough of it is decent enough that it's not a total loss. 2.5/5 stars.
- DirectorSean S. CunninghamStarsBetsy PalmerAdrienne KingJeannine TaylorA group of teenage camp counselors attempt to re-open an abandoned summer camp with a tragic past, but they are stalked by a mysterious, relentless killer.It's a little strange that this film was so successful, really. It's not particularly good. It's bloody, though, and maybe that's all it took. Right place, right time I suppose. The third act is particularly ferocious, which I suppose was also pretty new at the time, and probably left a good memory in the minds of audiences. 3/5
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsBetsy PalmerAmy SteelJohn FureyFive years after the events of the first film, a summer camp next to the infamous Camp Crystal Lake is preparing to open, but the legend of Jason is weighing heavy on the proceedings.There isn't much to think about, really. It's a pretty run-of-the-mill slasher film, even if those weren't necessarily a thing yet. Amy Steele makes a good if not underdeveloped "final girl"but that's about it. That being said, it isn't really a BAD film. It's not poorly made or anything, it just...well, it is just is. 2/5
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsDana KimmellTracie SavageRichard BrookerJason Voorhees stalks a group of friends who have just arrived to spend the weekend at a cabin near Crystal Lake.Well, again, considering it's basically the same as the previous films, it's hard to do any real analysis of it. It exists, it isn't terrible, it mostly is just a string of kills performed on a largely interchangeable cast. There's a little more character laced in-Shelley has some stuff to do, and Chris has her "trauma"-but there still isn't much in the way of writing. It is what it is, and what it is isn't terrible. 2/5
- DirectorJoseph ZitoStarsErich AndersonJudie AronsonPeter BartonAfter being announced dead and taken to a morgue, Jason Voorhees spontaneously revives, escapes from the hospital, and stalks a group of friends renting a house in the countryside near Crystal Lake.There are two films happening here. Movie A has Trish and Tommy, their Mother and The Bear Hunter dealing with Jason. Movie B is the usual movie with Jason wiping out a dozen or so teens in various ways. They merge in and out with each other, but it still feels like there were two movies going on. Movie A was much more subtle: there was some attempt at character development, a family unit that could have been fleshed out in any other horror film, and an outside force looking to disrupt their tenuous relationship. Movie B was the norm. No need for any subtlety, just hack and slash. I almost wonder what Movie A could have been if given the entire running time and some actual focused writing. 3/5
- DirectorDanny SteinmannStarsMelanie KinnamanJohn ShepherdAnthony BarrileStill haunted by his past, Tommy Jarvis, who, as a child, killed Jason Voorhees, is sent to a secluded halfway house in the countryside, where the killing of a young man triggers a brutal series of murders in the area.It's a wonderful bad movie, no doubt about it. It's filled with a great deal of over-the-top silliness and deranged performances, and it's so entertaining while being a big giant mess. Like I said before, there is some actual intelligence to the film's conception even though it's awkward in practice. If nothing else, it's worth it as a fun bad movie. Also, goth chick doing the robot to Psuedo Echo's "His Eyes," and a man named Demon getting killed in an outhouse. 2/5
- DirectorTom McLoughlinStarsThom MathewsJennifer CookeDavid KagenTommy Jarvis exhumes Jason Voorhees to cremate his corpse, but inadvertently brings him back to life instead. The newly revived killer seeks revenge, and Tommy may be the only one who can stop him.It's probably the cutest installment of the series. It's not the best, but the comedy element does add something to the mostly by-the-numbers entries that were the series hallmark. Thom Matthews and Jennifer Cooke are charming enough leads-at the very least we get a sense of personality from them-and there's some cute dialogue. The sheriff is a fun character, too, and I'm always glad to see a normal human get a few shots off on supernatural opponents. 3/5
- DirectorJohn Carl BuechlerStarsTerry KiserJennifer BankoJohn OtrinJason Voorhees is accidentally freed from his watery prison by a telekinetic teenager. Now, only she can stop him.Another really strange selection of characters and situations permeate this whole film, especially when you consider the fact that the "final girl" is a telekinetic. Despite being one of the silliest in terms of plot, the strangeness of the whole thing actually makes it work far better than it should. 3/5
- DirectorRob HeddenStarsJensen DaggettKane HodderTodd CaldecottJason Voorhees is accidentally awakened from his watery grave and ends up stalking a ship full of graduating high-school students headed to Manhattan, New York.Toxic Waste and Heroine-sharing Muggers. Only in the idiotic fever dream of a writer's version of New York! At least the Dog survived, with his spiffy little bandana intact. The gimmick of Jason-on-a-boat/Jason-in-the-city are well intentioned enough, even if they aren't super interesting or well handled but...it's a thing, and at least they tried to do something to keep the franchise afloat. 2/5
- DirectorAdam MarcusStarsJohn D. LeMayKari KeeganKane HodderSerial killer Jason Voorhees' supernatural origins are revealed.This movie at least has the guts to try something different with a worn out franchise. It doesn't all work-far from it-but there's enough fun to make it stand out and be actually entertaining. It's spirited and committed, which is more than I can say for most of the franchise. 3/5
- DirectorJames IsaacStarsKane HodderLexa DoigJeff GeddisJason Voorhees is cryogenically frozen at the beginning of the 21st century, and is discovered in the 25th century and taken to space. He gets thawed, and begins stalking and killing the crew of the spaceship that's transporting him.It's stupid, it's fun, it has some nice performances and a lot of heart, but not a lot of brains. But, honestly, that former part really puts it above a lot of other entries in the franchise. So, good on you, Jason X. 3/5
- DirectorMarcus NispelStarsJared PadaleckiAmanda RighettiDerek MearsA group of young adults visit a boarded up campsite named Crystal Lake where they soon encounter the mysterious Jason Voorhees and his deadly intentions.Well, as remakes go, this isn't so horrible. Padalecki and Panabaker do well with their roles, as do some of the other cast (the ones who have more to do than just stand around, have sex or go water-skiing), the depiction of Jason is reasonably well done. I think more of the blame for the weaknesses falls on Platinum Dunes, who can't help but get in their own way with these gritty reboots. Honestly, if there was one actual character trait for the series it was that it never took itself too seriously and yet somehow this remake was so very into being a straight slasher flick...the trouble is, we've done that before. There must have been a way to find a balance, but Platinum Dunes so frequently seems to mis-read it's audience. 2.5/5
- DirectorDario ArgentoStarsJessica HarperStefania CasiniFlavio BucciAn American newcomer to a prestigious German ballet academy comes to realize that the school is a front for something sinister amid a series of grisly murders.Quite possibly one of my favorite horror flicks ever. The opening sequence is probably the most beautiful horror film sequence ever filmed, and the rest of it is -while occasionally somewhat hard to follow- a really fun piece of surrealist filmmaking with some really effective moments. One of the classics. 4.5/5
- DirectorDario ArgentoStarsLeigh McCloskeyIrene MiracleEleonora GiorgiAn American student investigates the disappearance of his sister and the death of a friend, both connected from New York to Rome by an old alchemy book.While not up to par with "Suspiria", this sequel still has some fun moments. Argento still fills the whole thing with highly energetic visuals and a good, strong pace. It just isn't as good. 3.5/5
- DirectorDario ArgentoStarsAsia ArgentoCristian SolimenoAdam JamesAn American art student in Rome accidentally triggers the return of Mater Lachrymarum - the Third Mother - and must use her latent magical powers to end the witch's reign of terror.Highly mediocre finish to Argento's "Three Mothers" trilogy with his only moderately talented daughter Asia in the starring role. No doubt she's easy on the eyes, but most of the usually beautiful and interesting horror sequences Argento usually fills his films with are now unintentionally hilarious. As such, the film isn't all that great. 2.5/5
- DirectorClive BarkerStarsAndrew RobinsonClare HigginsAshley LaurenceA woman discovers the newly resurrected, partially formed, body of her brother-in-law and lover. She starts killing for him to revitalize his body and escape the demonic beings that are pursuing him after he escaped their underworld.It's a spirited but sometimes amateurish and messy piece. It has extraordinary visuals and some real dramatic flare, but it can't help that Barker was just a tad under-experienced. Taken as it's own thing, and understood as a piece of bizarre self-indulgence and emotional expression, it's a very fascinating and entertaining piece of work. 3.5/5.
- DirectorTony RandelStarsDoug BradleyAshley LaurenceClare HigginsKirsty is brought to an institution after the horrible events of Hellraiser (1987), where the occult-obsessive head doctor resurrects Julia and unleashes the Cenobites and their demonic underworld.Despite a somewhat frustrating ending, Hellbound offers some great moments and some really intelligent and thought-provoking themes and motifs throughout. A few minor, but fascinating literary references, some fun fairy tale motifs, a boatload of excellent visuals, interesting characters...and very little plot. The good that it offers far outweighs the bad. To think, I hesitated. 3/5
- DirectorAnthony HickoxStarsTerry FarrellDoug BradleyKevin BernhardtAn investigative reporter must send the newly unbound Pinhead and his legions back to Hell.A complete rumination on stylistic excess and pop-culture audacity. It has no mind to speak of, no point, no ambition for something greater: it just wanted to mess with your head, just a little. It wanted to make you roll your eyes while, maybe just a tiny bit, you smirk to yourself about how weird it all is. I think it's a triumph of style over substance and raw entertainment in it's purest, least pretentious form. It's by no means a great film, but I think it makes a wonderful trifecta with the first two: each has it's own strengths and weaknesses, as well as it's own very specific idea of what it is and what its goals are. Fun movie, nothing else. 3/5
- DirectorKevin YagherStarsBruce RamsayValentina VargasDoug BradleyIn the 22nd century, a scientist attempts to right the wrong his ancestor created: the puzzle box that opens the gates of Hell and unleashes Pinhead and his Cenobite legions.Uh...geez, I got nothing. There's some decent visuals but it fails on every other conceivable level. I don't know that I believe a lot of it to be Yagher's fault, though:it feels like a lot of issues with this film really came in the pre-production stage. But, no matter who is really at fault...it's a bad movie. 1.5/5
- DirectorScott DerricksonStarsCraig ShefferNicholas TurturroJames RemarA shady police detective becomes embroiled in a strange world of murder, sadism and madness after being assigned a murder investigation against a madman known only as "The Engineer".In a lot of ways Inferno almost feels like a tragedy: I feel like if you showed me just bits and pieces of this film, I'd feel pretty good about it. I feel like the people who worked on the film felt pretty good about it...there's so much that could work on it's own but just somehow doesn't. Nothing quite connects like it should. The sudden death of his Daughter and the shattering of her frozen arm has a brief effect, but not because there's an earned response but simply because it's a child. It's a frustrating movie, simply because it feels like it COULD be good. So many moments FEEL like they should mean something. But they don't, and I really can't quite put my finger on why. 2/5
- DirectorRick BotaStarsDean WintersAshley LaurenceDoug BradleyAfter a car crash, a shady stockbroker suffers from amnesia. This leaves him in a hazy limbo of sex and murder. But, as in a predestined journey, he unmistakenly takes the bait and follows the marked-out clues all the way to Pinhead.Most of this really shouldn't have worked but did somehow, mostly because Bota knows his way around composition, when to use harsh light and soft light, and can frame and design a strong scene. Winters gives a strange performance that, while it probably isn't actually a good performance, it's at least very interesting and adds to the feeling of mystery throughout the film. The effects work is sub-par, but it's hard to blame them on the little cash they likely had to make it. The story, once it explains itself, is also very cliche and unconvincing, trying to end up in a place as poignant as it kind of promised it would, and ultimately fails to deliver. It's well executed, and means well, but it's still a poor outing. 2.5/5
- DirectorRick BotaStarsKari WuhrerIonut ChermenskiHugh JorginA journalist uncovers an underground group who can bring back the dead and slowly becomes drawn into their world.It's a mess, it doesn't make a lot of sense, there's virtually no real plot cohesion or anything...but there are some strong scenes, some decent set design and camerawork, and Kari Wuhrer's strong performance. You win some, you lose some. Overall, like it's immediate predecessor: it's better than it has any right to be. 2.5/5
- DirectorRick BotaStarsStelian UrianKatheryn WinnickAnna TolputtGamers playing a MMORPG based on the "Hellraiser" films find their lives endangered after being invited to a rave, the host of which intends to show them the truth behind the Cenobite mythos.It exists. But Henry "Superman" Cavill got a blow job, so...good for him. 1/5
- DirectorVíctor GarciaStarsJolene AndersenSteven BrandDan BuranTwo college friends unwittingly release Pinhead and his minions.Ugh. There's some good ideas in here-there really are, god help me-but the execution is really subpar. Poorly acted, poorly directed...just poorly made. There really is some good conception, and I've seen worse horror film endings...but this was pretty rough. 1/5
- DirectorJohn CarpenterStarsDonald PleasenceJamie Lee CurtisTony MoranFifteen years after murdering his sister on Halloween night 1963, Michael Myers escapes from a mental hospital and returns to the small town of Haddonfield, Illinois to kill again.Well, it's a classic and genre defining juggernaut for a reason. I'm not sure a final analysis is even necessary, since every jerk and his sister has likely see this film at least the one time. Carpenter shows a real knack for suspense, which isn't surprising since the gore effects and exploitation films didn't come until afterwards...while it's true that Black Christmas did a lot of this stuff sooner, I think Carpenter probably did manage to make it work more successfully than that film did. It's a fairly terrifying movie that probably would seem a little tame to a modern audience, but the sheer film-making magic that Carpenter managed to pull together here really is a wonder to behold. 4.5/5
- DirectorRick RosenthalStarsJamie Lee CurtisDonald PleasenceCharles CyphersWhile Dr. Loomis hunts for Michael Myers, a traumatized Laurie is rushed to Haddonfield Memorial Hospital, and The Shape is not far behind her.Director Rosenthal clearly had a real affection for Carpenters original film and, as such, made a pretty faithful follow-up. Obviously there's more emphasis on traditional slasher film elements that, really, fail more often than not. Pleasance is the real winner here, giving an intense and committed performance. Curtis literally sits out most of the proceedings, and no other actors are given much to do, so basically we have Loomis and Myers to watch, which is clearly something the producers of the franchise realized were more or less their bread and butter. While the rivalry has it's ups and downs over time, it mostly works in this installment. Not the strongest film in the world, but a fairly strong sequel. 3.5/5
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsTom AtkinsStacey NelkinDan O'HerlihyKids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran.It has a really solid first act that just slowly but surely degenerates into a sloppy, disjointed mess. It's one of the worst offenders of early-eighties kitchen sink film making: pagan ritual, killer masks, robot duplicates, evil corporate conspiracies...could have picked one or two to utilize and made a stronger film. The characterization is awkward and jumbled, with even our lead hero's motivations and personality being murky and shaky. That being said, there is still a creative sense of fun to some of the proceedings, and that kind of makes up for a lot of the weaknesses throughout. 2.5/5
- DirectorDwight H. LittleStarsDonald PleasenceEllie CornellDanielle HarrisTen years after his original massacre, the invalid Michael Myers awakens on Halloween Eve and returns to Haddonfield to kill his seven-year-old niece. Can Dr. Loomis stop him?This, like many other sequels in general, gets more derision that I think it probably deserves. It's by no means a classic or compares to the original in any way but in the end it manages to have some fun as a continuation of a story that is largely impossible to beat. Sequels are supposed to do that, really: the idea that a sequel is supposed to compete with the original installment in any way, shape or form is really kind of absurd. But, given it's status as a sequel, Halloween 4 gives enough fun slasher moments, suspenseful sequences and performances (mostly by Pleasence and Harris) that it works more often than it doesn't. It lacks a lot of the punch it's predecessors had, but it's not nearly as watered down as many claim. It's simple, it's fun, it barely avoids being mindless...it's not a bad flick. 3/5
- DirectorDominique Othenin-GirardStarsDonald PleasenceDanielle HarrisEllie CornellOne year after the events of Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988), the Shape returns to Haddonfield once again in an attempt to kill his now-mute niece.The worst sins of Halloween 5 are how utterly run-of-the-mill it really is. There's no plot, no suspense, no tension, just random kills and scenes with very little cohesion. Plus, that last act is very by-the-numbers and ludicrous with one of the more rotten endings in recent memory. That being said, the film does a few things well: The subversions apparent in the character of Tina are well played and interesting, even if that's blown to all hell by the sudden need to unceremoniously ditch her at the end of the second act, and the film plays well with sentiment and emotion (even if the characterization, particularly in who they are and what they do, is occasionally in question), with a few capable actors making those emotions work. It isn't a good film, but I wouldn't necessarily call it the utter pile of garbage that many make it out to be. I feel like it's heart is mostly in the right place, there just wasn't enough skill to keep it all afloat.. 2.5/5
- DirectorJoe ChappelleStarsDonald PleasencePaul RuddMarianne HaganSix years after Michael Myers last terrorized Haddonfield, he returns there in pursuit of his niece, Jamie Lloyd, who has escaped with her newborn child, for which Michael and a mysterious cult have sinister plans.While I still feel like Halloween Resurrection is actually the series low point, this really does run it a close second. It's a remarkably sloppy movie with one of the worst narrative flows I've come across. Characters just appear places, motivations are flimsy at best, nothing is fundamentally established or explained with anything except a few cursory lines of expository and nonsensical jargon. That said, a few brief flourishes from Pleasence (as wasted as he is here) and Rudd's mixed bag of performance choices (ranging from interesting to watch in a hilarious sort of way to painfully stiff and awkward) bring some life to the piece...not enough to really save it from being one of the worst examples of the horrible stuff the mid-nineties managed to produce. 2/5.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsJamie Lee CurtisJosh HartnettAdam ArkinLaurie Strode, now the dean of a Northern California private school with an assumed name, must battle the Shape one last time, as the life of her own son hangs in the balance.It's jumbled and messy like so many other nineties horror flicks...the build-up is mostly non-existent beyond some characterization for Laurie and her son, and even that finds itself never expanded on or resolved, and is mostly entirely dropped. There's no suspense, most of the deaths are random and committed on characters we don't know or care about, and the ending is a rushed dash to the credits with little meaning. It all boils down to one singular purpose: to have Jamie Lee Curtis in a Halloween movie again. 2.5/5
- DirectorRick RosenthalStarsJamie Lee CurtisBusta RhymesBrad LoreeThree years after he last terrorized his sister, Michael Myers confronts her again, before traveling to Haddonfield to deal with the cast and crew of a reality show which is being broadcast from his old home.Easily the lowest point of the whole series. Listing the reasons why would likely take twice as long as actually watching this garbage did. 1/5
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsScout Taylor-ComptonMalcolm McDowellTyler ManeAfter being committed for 15 years, Michael Myers, now a grown man and still very dangerous, escapes from the mental institution and immediately returns to Haddonfield to find his baby sister, Laurie.It's not a completely terrible film. Early on there is some halfway decent camerawork and creative displays...it's just that Zombie is a terrible writer, obsessed with trashy and exploitative imagery and values and generally not much of a film-maker. There are some so-so performances that are obviously hampered by the baffling decision to give them a few seconds at a time to actually present themselves in any meaningful way. 1.5/5
- DirectorRob ZombieStarsScout Taylor-ComptonTyler ManeMalcolm McDowellLaurie Strode struggles to come to terms with her brother Michael's deadly return to Haddonfield, Illinois; meanwhile, Michael prepares for another reunion with his sister.I have no more insights to offer. No more barbs, witty or angry. I just have nothing.
Nothing.
1/5 - DirectorRoman PolanskiStarsCatherine DeneuveIan HendryJohn FraserA sex-repulsed woman who disapproves of her sister's boyfriend sinks into depression and has horrific visions of rape and violence.Creepy Polanski film with fantastic use of setting and creative camera work to create a sense of unease and imbalance really imbue the film with a wonderfully surrealist feel. Some really great work from an admittedly repugnant man, but his directing style is really something to behold. 4/5
- DirectorRoman PolanskiStarsMia FarrowJohn CassavetesRuth GordonA young couple trying for a baby moves into an aging, ornate apartment building on Central Park West, where they find themselves surrounded by peculiar neighbors.Another stylish outing from Polanski, and an amazing horror classic to boot. Mia Farrow is amazing throughout, and the horror sequences are surreal and horrifying without being too weird. It's weird enough, though. Thoroughly engaging. 4/5
- DirectorRobin HardyStarsEdward WoodwardChristopher LeeDiane CilentoA puritan police sergeant arrives in a Scottish island village in search of a missing girl, who the pagan locals claim never existed.What a film. Just an amazing achievement in world-building and an enthralling acting exercise, and possibly one of the best horror film endings ever. Superb. 4.5/5
- DirectorNeil LaButeStarsNicolas CageEllen BurstynLeelee SobieskiA sheriff investigating the disappearance of a young girl from a small island discovers there's a larger mystery to solve among the island's secretive, neo-pagan community.Impressively, someone managed to take one of the best films ever and turn it into a ridiculous embarrassment of a remake. The over-the-top performance of lead Nicholas Cage has turned the whole film into something of an internet sensation. But you're better off sticking to the memes than dealing with the finished product as a whole. 1.5/5
- DirectorBob ClarkStarsOlivia HusseyKeir DulleaMargot KidderDuring their Christmas break, a group of sorority girls are stalked by a stranger.It's a simple, honest and direct film by all accounts. There's nothing flashy about it, it's not gory or particularly scandalous: it's just a dark story about people being victimized on Christmas. The comedy is often very funny but does get a little irritating before the credits roll. Everyone is good in it, though, and it's one of the few films I genuinely do get creeped out by. Extraordinary film. 4/5
- DirectorGlen MorganStarsMichelle TrachtenbergMary Elizabeth WinsteadLacey ChabertOn Christmas Eve, an escaped maniac returns to his childhood home, which is now a sorority house, and begins to murder the sorority sisters one by one.What a mess. Poor scripting, scattered direction, and laborious pacing are just a few of the numerous problems plaguing this film. It should have been a slam dunk-remaking a film like Black Christmas shouldn't have been tough-but somehow, someway, they managed to botch nearly every aspect of production along the way. This is, of course, exempting the casting agent, who did an excellent job gathering a very talented group of young and interesting actresses to ultimately be poorly utilized and under supported. It's a shame. Really is. 2/5 because Katie Cassidy is in it, and I love her.
- DirectorTod BrowningKarl FreundStarsBela LugosiHelen ChandlerDavid MannersTransylvanian vampire Count Dracula bends a naive real estate agent to his will, then takes up residence at a London estate where he sleeps in his coffin by day and searches for potential victims by night.What is there to say? It's an amazing flick and so very important to the history of the genre. It's not the first horror movie(though it's pretty close) but it's probably the most influential. There certainly wouldn't be a horror movie without it. Excellent stuff. 4.5/5
- DirectorFrancis Ford CoppolaStarsGary OldmanWinona RyderAnthony HopkinsThe centuries old vampire Count Dracula comes to England to seduce his barrister Jonathan Harker's fiancée Mina Murray and inflict havoc in the foreign land.It seems to change as often as Dracula's form itself: from act to act, it metamorphoses into very different things, at times clearly meant to be excessive to the point of self-parody to times of dead seriousness. The movie seems content enough to just be aggressive and...well, just to be. 3/5
- DirectorRichard DonnerStarsGregory PeckLee RemickHarvey StephensMysterious deaths surround an American ambassador. Could the child that he is raising actually be the Antichrist? The Devil's own son?Richard Donner's amazing biblical horror flick is really pretty remarkable. Really amazing music, strong performances and some very cool scenes make the whole not just a fantastic horror flick, but a strong film all around. 4.5/5
- DirectorJohn MooreStarsLiev SchreiberJulia StilesSeamus Davey-FitzpatrickAn American official realizes that his young son may literally be the Devil incarnate.It's always interesting to view remakes, for better or for worse. In some cases they're wildly reinterpreted, sometimes they're simply turned on their heads or, such as with 2006's "The Omen", they're barely changed at all. It's virtually a shot for shot remake, but without Donner's masterful turn at the helm, and sadly the cast are pale substitutes to the original's ensemble. Julia Stiles does what she can, but unfortunately Liev Schriber still has someone telling him that he's a full actor and not just a character actor. But even then, everyone should have known he could never be Gregory Peck. 2.5/5
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsA. Michael BaldwinBill ThornburyReggie BannisterA teenage boy and his friends face off against a mysterious grave robber, known only as the Tall Man, who employs a lethal arsenal of unearthly weapons.BOYYYYYYYYYY!
Well, that and a sudden realization this Phantasm is actually a really clever mash-up of elements and concepts from that period's greatest genre works. 3.5/5 - DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsJames Le GrosReggie BannisterAngus ScrimmMike, now released from a psychiatric hospital, meets with Reggie, and discover his dreams (the events of the original film) are real, and they both journey to find and stop the evil Tall Man from his grim work.So much wild and crazy fun. One of the strongest sequels in Horror. Crammed full of various fictional tropes and themes and lots of action and excitement. It may not have the artistic quality or the cultish elements of the original, but Coscarelli ups the ante anyway. Good show. 3/5
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsReggie BannisterA. Michael BaldwinBill ThornburyMike and Reggie continue to hunt the mysterious Tall Man, discovering along the way that the invasion has already begun.It's fun. There's some awkwardness stemming from being a third installment: the new characters don't quite land as well as they should, some of the comedy falls flatter than previous installments. But, as another entertaining genre mash-up, it's still a lot of fun. 2.5/5
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsA. Michael BaldwinReggie BannisterBill ThornburyMike travels through time and dimensions to find the Tall Man's origins.It has a lot of awkward moments and a dragging middle point, but it gets a lot of mileage out of nostalgia and call backs. It's much more self serious than previous entries, but as I said earlier: at some point even a series as silly as Phantasm would need to stop a moment and reflect. 2.5/5
- DirectorGeorge A. RomeroStarsHal HolbrookLeslie NielsenAdrienne Barbeau"Creepshow" is a 1982 movie that tells five grisly tales from a children's comic book: a murdered father rising from his grave, a bizarre meteor, a vengeful husband, a mysterious crate's occupant, and a plague of cockroaches.Stephen King and George Romero's ode to the old EC comics is incredibly true to it's influence. It's weird, it's fun and it's very quirky. They don't make good anthology films like this one anymore. 4/5
- DirectorMichael GornickStarsGeorge KennedyLois ChilesDomenick JohnThree macabre tales from the latest issue of a boy's favorite comic book, dealing with a vengeful wooden Native American, a monstrous blob in a lake, and an undying hitchhiker.While not up to the standards set by the original, the second film deserves some credit for the really great middle story "The Raft", which was always among my favorite King stories. The other segments aren't as great, but they're still worth a watch. 3/5
- DirectorTom HollandStarsChris SarandonWilliam RagsdaleAmanda Bearse"Fright Night" sees a teenager believing that the newcomer in his neighborhood is a vampire. He turns to an actor in a television hosted horror movie show for help to deal with the undead.Probably one of the funnest vampire movies ever made, mostly for the quirky and engaging performance of Roddy Mcdowell as washed up creature-feature host Peter Vincent. Just a good fun vampire romp. 3.5/5
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsWilliam RagsdaleRoddy McDowallTraci Lind"Fright Night Part 2" is a sequel to "link=tt0089175]". Charley Brewster and the horror host Peter Vincent must face more vampires, out for revenge.Inferior and slightly off-kilter sequel featuring most of the original cast returning to do battle with another Vampire looking for some payback. Once again, McDowell is the highlight of the piece. 3/5
- DirectorCraig GillespieStarsAnton YelchinColin FarrellDavid Tennant"Fright Night" - A new neighbor moves in next to Charley, who discovers that he is an ancient vampire who preys on the community. Can he save his neighborhood from the creature with the help of the famous "vampire killer", Peter Vincent?One of the better remakes made during the ongoing remake era, featurig some really great performances and some interesting updates. Colin Farrell has never been better than he is here. Perhaps not quite as much fun as the original, but still a very strong vampire movie. 3/5
- DirectorTobe HooperStarsJoBeth WilliamsHeather O'RourkeCraig T. NelsonA family's home is haunted by a host of demonic ghosts.A lot of fright fans can usually cite this as one of their first forays into the genre, and there are few better suited for that purpose. It's scary, it's funny and it's deeply charming. Perfect for newbies and veterans alike. 4/5
- DirectorBrian GibsonStarsJoBeth WilliamsCraig T. NelsonHeather O'RourkeThe Freeling family have a new house, but their troubles with supernatural forces don't seem to be over.It's kind of amazing how quickly the Poltergeist franchise began to show cracks in it's almost-perfect foundation. While it gets some points for the incredibly creepy Reverend Kane and all of his wacked-out *beep* there's not much else to really recommend. Well, okay, Craig T. Nelson's hammy Reverend Kane impression. 2.5/5
- DirectorGary ShermanStarsHeather O'RourkeTom SkerrittNancy AllenCarol Anne is staying with her aunt in a high-rise building, where the supernatural forces haunting her make their return.A very weird, very underwhelming death knell for the Poltergeist franchise. It does occasionally fall into "so bad it's good" territory, especially the moments with Zelda Rubenstein. Not nearly enough "weird in a good way" and way too much muddled storytelling just make it borderline unwatchable. 1.5/5
- DirectorAlfred HitchcockStarsAnthony PerkinsJanet LeighVera MilesA Phoenix secretary embezzles $40,000 from her employer's client, goes on the run and checks into a remote motel run by a young man under the domination of his mother.I envy anyone who is actually about to see this for the first time. Of course, it's unlikely anyone is likely to go into completely blind due to it's age, but that's kind of sad in it's own way. It's a masterpiece of filmmaking and an undeniable influence to both the slasher and suspense/thriller subgenres. Incredible stuff. 5/5
- DirectorMick GarrisStarsAnthony PerkinsCCH PounderHenry ThomasNorman Bates recalls his childhood with his abusive mother while fearing his unborn child will inherit his split personality disorder.Muddled, weird little prequel film that benefits from Anthony Perkins being uncannily good at being Norman Bates and the unbelievably campy performance by Olivia Hussey. Mick Garris's direction has it's moments of creepiness(hard to screw up incestual sexual abuse). Not nearly as good as the original or as Part two (which I apparently forgot to add to this list chronologically with the rest of the franchise), but it's still unnerving enough(again, incest) to be worth a watch. 2.5/5
- DirectorGus Van SantStarsVince VaughnAnne HecheJulianne MooreA young female embezzler arrives at the Bates Motel, which has terrible secrets of its own.Gus Van Sant's remake is almost literally shot for shot except an unnecessary focus on sexuality that basically just comes off as repulsive. Nobody is even close to being on par with the original cast, but in the end you can't fault anyone for trying. 2/5
- DirectorStanley KubrickStarsJack NicholsonShelley DuvallDanny LloydA family heads to an isolated hotel for the winter where a sinister presence influences the father into violence, while his psychic son sees horrific forebodings from both past and future.I'm not as big a fan of this as a lot of other people are, but that's not to say I don't like it. I've always been a huge fan of Kubrick's directorial style and this film is chalk full of that. One I'm not as big a fan of is the over-the-top performances that permeate the whole thing. Nicholson's performance has become somewhat iconic to a great deal of people, and I just feel it's kinda overrated. 3.5/5
- StarsRebecca De MornaySteven WeberWil HorneffA recovering alcoholic must wrestle with demons within and without when he and his family move into a haunted hotel as caretakers.I feel the balance is somewhat shifted in the opposite direction for this made-for-tv retelling of King's famous novel. Sorely missing that wonderful directorial direction but benefiting from a much more accurate (and less hammy) performance from Steven Weber as Jack Torrance as well as some of the more memorable moments from the original source novel. Unfortunately the lack of Kubrickian magic does tend to tip this in a more negative way. 3/5
- DirectorKathryn BigelowStarsAdrian PasdarJenny WrightLance HenriksenA small-town farmer's son reluctantly joins a traveling group of vampires after he is bitten by a beautiful drifter.Another classic yet often overlooked vampire movie with strong performances and some really interesting takes on the familiar vampire legends. Bill Paxton might be the scariest vampire in film history. Some really good stuff. 4/5
- DirectorMary LambertStarsDale MidkiffDenise CrosbyFred GwynneAfter tragedy strikes, a grieving father discovers an ancient burial ground behind his home with the power to raise the dead.Almost too scary King adaptation features some really unsettling stuff. One of the very few films I can't sit through every minute of, mainly due to the horrifying Aunt Zelda stuff as well as the very real and emotional moments that weave in and out of the narrative (that funeral scene is pretty friggin' brutal). But, in the end, this is a really strong horror flick that is likely to get under the skin of just about any viewer. 3.5/5
- DirectorMary LambertStarsEdward FurlongAnthony EdwardsClancy BrownA teenage boy and his father move to his recently-deceased mother's hometown, where they encounter the ancient Native American cemetery with the power to raise the dead.Tame and lame sequel starring the tame and lame Edward Furlong. There's virutally nothing worth mentioning here except maybe for Clancy Brown's unhinged performance (which, really, Clancy Brown is pretty much at his best when he's playing unhinged). 1.5/5
- DirectorRidley ScottStarsSigourney WeaverTom SkerrittJohn HurtThe crew of a commercial spacecraft encounters a deadly lifeform after investigating a mysterious transmission of unknown origin.When it comes to the argument over whether or not this is a sci-fi film or a horror film, I firmly come down on the horror side. The use of atmosphere, sparing visual effects and gothic pretensions have a heavy horror influence. Add to that that Ripley is one of the best examples of the traditonal "final girl" and you have a remarkable classic horror flick. 4.5/5
- DirectorJames CameronStarsSigourney WeaverMichael BiehnCarrie HennDecades after surviving the Nostromo incident, Ellen Ripley is sent out to re-establish contact with a terraforming colony but finds herself battling the Alien Queen and her offspring.Now the sequel is far more along the sci-fi lines, what with the big crazy marines doing battle with a swarm of monstrous aliens. In that sense, it's not quite as good as the original (but few films are) but it has it's place in cinema history. I'm not nearly as big a fan of it as a lot of other people are, but it's okay. 3.5/5
- DirectorDavid FincherStarsSigourney WeaverCharles S. DuttonCharles DanceReturning from LV-426, Ellen Ripley crash-lands on the maximum-security prison Fiorina 161, where she discovers that she has unwittingly brought along an unwelcome visitor.Far more underrated than it probably should be. David Fincher made his directorial debut with a very stylish little prison movie meets gothic horror and, while far from perfect, it works rather well. 3/5
- DirectorJean-Pierre JeunetStarsSigourney WeaverWinona RyderDominique PinonTwo centuries after her death, a powerful human/alien hybrid clone of Ellen Ripley aids a crew of space pirates in stopping the aliens from reaching Earth.While the 3rd film borrowed a lot of it's identity from the original, "Resurrection" wears the second film as it's influence rather proudly. A lot of action sequences and larger than life characters are the name of the game here and, to it's credit, it mostly works rather well. The third act sort of implodes on itself and becomes way too...well, weird for it's own good. But most of it is rather fun. 3/5
- DirectorRidley ScottStarsNoomi RapaceLogan Marshall-GreenMichael FassbenderFollowing clues to the origin of mankind, a team finds a structure on a distant moon, but they soon realize they are not alone.The internet kind of savaged this after it's release, and I'm not entirely sure why. If for nothing else, I'd praise this movie for Michael Fassbenders wonderful performance and the extremely intense c-section sequence alone. Maybe some of the logic doesn't hold, but it has enough brilliance to more than make up for it's flaws. 3.5/5
- DirectorJohn CarpenterStarsSam NeillJürgen ProchnowJulie CarmenAn insurance investigator begins discovering that the impact a horror writer's books have on his fans is more than inspirational.Such a clever and intelligent film. It's somewhat dated, a little bit goofy, but a very well made film. It was also ahead of its time in a lot of ways: meta didn't really become a thing for some time later, really. Sam Neil is excellent and definitely carries it over the finishing line. It's also a lot of fun for horror readers, too: the references to Lovecraft are numerous, but also in general there's a celebration of horror fiction tropes and conventions that are really a blast to watch. There is some awkwardness from those conventions here and there, probably from the crossing from prose to film (the film itself is not an adaptation, though). Still, a lot of fun. 3.5/5
- DirectorMike FlanaganStarsKatie ParkerCourtney BellDave LevineA woman and her sister begin to link a mysterious tunnel to a series of disappearances, including that of her own husband.Really clever low budget quicky about two sisters dealing with mysterious disappearances that amounts to something...really different. It never quite goes where you think it's going to go, and has some really interesting choices when it comes to pacing and atmosphere. Really worth it if you're looking for something different. 4/5
- DirectorPaul W.S. AndersonStarsLaurence FishburneSam NeillKathleen QuinlanA rescue crew is tasked with investigating the mysterious reappearance of a spaceship that had been lost for seven years.It's like there are two versions of Event Horizon happening right in front of us: there is the one that is presented via performance, set design and cinematography that is dark, moody, atmospheric and frightening. Then there's the one that exists in the script, which is mostly cliches and (and it pains me to say this) mostly hackneyed gore effects. As I said before, the movie never really lives up to its potential as anything but an entertaining diversion. That said, the cast is excellent if occasionally under utilized (Kathleen Quinlan in particular is capable of a lot more), and it has an excellent sense of atmosphere and establishment of tone. Fun cult movie. 3/5
- DirectorRobert RodriguezStarsJordana BrewsterClea DuVallLaura HarrisWhen Casey Connor, Herrington High School's newspaper photographer, witnesses the murder of a nurse and sees her alive again, he decides to investigate the bizarre happenings."The Breakfast Club" meets "Invasion of the body snatchers". The cast is deceptively good with somewhat mediocre material, particularly a rather likable Josh Hartnett. Not everything in the story holds it together well, due to a fairly mediocre script and the "wacky over substance" directorial style of Robert Rodriguez, but it's undeniably fun. 2.5/5
- DirectorBrad AndersonStarsDavid CarusoStephen GevedonPaul GuilfoyleTensions rise within an asbestos cleaning crew as they work in an abandoned mental hospital with a horrific past that seems to be coming back.Subtle, ultra-low budget indy flick has a way of getting to you despite not having much to offer in the sense of action or even intrigue. There's just something about the use of location, slow and ponderous pacing, and uneasy camerawork that just creates a sincere sense of unease. Truly creepy little flick. 4/5
- DirectorRobert WiseStarsJulie HarrisClaire BloomRichard JohnsonHill House has stood for about 90 years and appears haunted: its inhabitants have always met strange, tragic ends. Now Dr. John Markway has assembled a team of people who he thinks will prove whether or not the house is haunted.Far ahead of it's time. Atmospheric and creepy, touching on some themes that won't be popularized in film for a long time to come, and just fantastic use of implication over outright scares make the whole thing utterly brilliant. 4/5
- DirectorJan de BontStarsLiam NeesonCatherine Zeta-JonesOwen WilsonDr Marrow enlists Theo, Luke and Nell for a study of sleep disorders at the Hill House. As soon as the terrifying truth about the mansion is revealed, everyone is found fighting for their lives.One of the worst remakes ever. All of the big name veteran actors drop the ball over and over, and the emphasis on bad CGI to create the scares is a complete bastardization of the source material- which insisted on suspense and subtlety to tell it's story- and just makes for a thoroughly unsatisfying filmgoing experience. 2/5
- DirectorFrank DarabontStarsThomas JaneMarcia Gay HardenLaurie HoldenA freak storm unleashes a species of bloodthirsty creatures on a small town, where a small band of citizens hole up in a supermarket and fight for their lives.Entertaining Stephen King adaptation features great performances, creative monsters and lots of fun social commentary. It's probably one of the best group survival horror films out there. It's basically a classic Romero flick merging with H.P. Lovecraft. The ending is particularly amazing. 4/5
- DirectorMichael HanekeStarsSusanne LotharUlrich MüheArno FrischTwo violent young men take a mother, father, and son hostage in their vacation cabin and force them to play sadistic "games" with one another for their own amusement.Really creepy indictment of violence in media really hits home with all but the most desensitized viewers. The savagery of the acts, the sick familiarity, and the blurring of the fourth wall really make it almost too much to take...but it keeps you enthralled and doesn't let you go. Some really great work. 4/5
- DirectorMichael HanekeStarsNaomi WattsTim RothMichael PittTwo psychopathic young men take a family hostage in their cabin.Michael Haneke, when faced with the reality of a remake of his 1997 french classic, decided to step up and make it himself which resulted in this almost shot for shot recreation. Given that it's the same director redoing his own material, all the stuff that worked in the original still works just as well, it's just...somehow different with the new american actors. Naomi Watts and Michael Pitt both nail their characters, though. Honestly, the only reason not to watch both would be if you really, really hate subtitles. 4/5
- DirectorCarlo LedesmaStarsBel DeliáAndy RodoredaSteve DavisAn investigation into a government cover-up leads to a network of abandoned train tunnels deep beneath the heart of Sydney. As a journalist and her crew hunt for the story it quickly becomes clear the story is hunting them.The found footage sub-genre is always a mixed bag. The hardest thing for them to do is to successfully justify the existence of the camera in the narrative. "The Tunnel Movie" does that really well by more heavily relying on the mockumentary style. On top of that, the film does really well with clearly limited resources and an interesting take on the moral dillemas readily present in horror cinema. It doesn't all work, but when it's on it's on. 3.5/5
- DirectorChristophe GansStarsRadha MitchellLaurie HoldenSean BeanA woman, Rose, goes in search for her adopted daughter within the confines of a strange, desolate town called Silent Hill.Taken for what it is (which is, let's face it, a video game adaptation. No judgement, it's just that it is), Silent Hill works considerably better than it has any right to. By all accounts, this movie should have been unwatchable (if we learned anything from Doom and Super Mario Bros and countless others, it's that Hollywood doesn't have a great track record with video game films) but still manages to be a lot of different things for a lot of different people, and that's no small feat. The actors all seem to be pretty committed, as does the production team and (most importantly) the director, not only to making a good horror film but a good adaptation to boot. Not everything works: a really clumsy and even a little dull third act, occasionally underwhelming effects, muddy story...but, there are enough inspired moments of lunacy to keep things going. It's no classic, but it's certainly an entertaining enough watch. 3/5
- DirectorTom HollandStarsCatherine HicksChris SarandonAlex VincentA struggling single mother unknowingly gifts her son a doll imbued with a serial killer's consciousness.It's really rather silly: Serial killer ends up in a kid's doll and somehow still manages to kill full-grown adults while being incredibly foul-mouthed. Somehow, though, it worked well enough to spawn four sequels and a re-make (which, admittedly, is stuck in development hell at the moment). It's actually not a terrible film, for all of it's nonsense. The sequels end up being more fun, but this is the most technically sound of any of them. 2.5/5
- DirectorJohn LafiaStarsAlex VincentJenny AgutterGerrit GrahamWhile Andy's mother is admitted to a psychiatric hospital, the young boy is placed in foster care, and Chucky, determined to claim Andy's soul, is not far behind.Despite not being as strong a film as the original, this is probably my personal favorite in the franchise. The Chucky effects are never as good as they are in this installment, and the almost hilarious dialouge and situations just end up being far more enjoyable than they probably should. 2.5/5
- DirectorJack BenderStarsJustin WhalinPerrey ReevesJeremy SylversChucky returns for revenge against Andy, the young boy who defeated him, and now a teenager living in a military academy.More of the same as Chucky menaces a military school. The best part of this one is how hilarious people are handled by the script: seriously, this universe is populated by people who REALLY hate dolls. Kind of falls in the "so bad it's good" category. 2/5
- DirectorRonny YuStarsJennifer TillyBrad DourifKatherine HeiglChucky, the doll possessed by a serial killer, discovers the perfect mate to kill and revive into the body of another doll.Don't bother asking "why", because you won't ever find an answer. Of course, this one veers entirely towards the comedy part of "horror-comedy", with Jennifer Tilly hamming up every single scene she's in. It's really, really weird. 2/5
- DirectorDon ManciniStarsJennifer TillyBrad DourifJohn WatersChucky and Tiffany are resurrected by their innocent gender-confused child, Glen/Glenda, and hit Hollywood, where a movie depicting the killer dolls' murder spree is underway.It got worse. This painful piece of garbage isn't funny or scary, it's just obnoxious. It tries really hard, but no avail. 1.5/5
- DirectorRobert RodriguezStarsHarvey KeitelGeorge ClooneyJuliette LewisTwo criminals and their hostages unknowingly seek temporary refuge in a truck stop populated by vampires, with chaotic results.Easily falls into the "so bad it's good" territory. Everyone seems to be having a good time, and George Clooney is so watchable that it's easy to forget just how ridiculous the whole thing is. But it's fast-paced, refuses to take itself too seriously, and is so amazingly self aware that it's more than fun. It somewhat depends on how much Clooney and Harvey keitel can offset the irritation of Juliet Lewis and Quention Tarantino. 3/5
- DirectorScott SpiegelStarsRobert PatrickBo HopkinsDuane WhitakerFive career criminals gather in Mexico to pull off a bank heist. They soon realize that they are up against far more frightening creatures than the police pursuing them.After the immense fun of the original, it's hard to find too much to enjoy about this mediocre sequel. There's a real sense of energy involved, but it fails to resonate much beyond that. 2/5
- DirectorP.J. PesceStarsMarco LeonardiMichael ParksAra CeliSet 100 years ago in Mexico, this horror/western is the story of the birth of the vampire princess Santanico Pandemonium.Imaginative prequel throws itself into the deep end quickly with this rather engaging, mirthful vampire western. Michael Parks is to die for as civil war era writer (and incredible drunk) Ambrose Bierce, and the film's energetic direction smacks heavily of being influenced by the original film. A great silly fun movie. 3/5
- DirectorJohn Erick DowdleStarsJennifer CarpenterSteve HarrisColumbus ShortA television reporter and her cameraman are trapped inside a building quarantined by the CDC, after the outbreak of a mysterious virus which turns humans into bloodthirsty killers.I've mentioned before my somewhat inherent distrust of found footage films (not to mention remakes), but "Quarantine" mostly works due to Jennifer Carpenter's dedication to making the role her own. Not everything works; a lot of problems that plague found footage films are present here (awkward camera work is never the friend of coherent storytelling) but it ends up scary enough to be worth the time it takes to watch it. 2.5/5
- DirectorTi WestStarsJocelin DonahueTom NoonanMary WoronovIn 1983, financially struggling college student Samantha Hughes takes a strange babysitting job that coincides with a full lunar eclipse. She slowly realizes her clients harbor a terrifying secret, putting her life in mortal danger.Highly entertaining throwback flick that harkens back to the devil-worship fad of the late 70's and early 80's. Everything from the story, to the soundtrack to the film stock is clearly influenced by that eras filmmaking to really impressive effect. In the end, these are more stunts than real solid storytelling but you'll be so engrossed you won't even notice for a long time after. 3.5/5
- DirectorWilliam CastleStarsVincent PriceCarol OhmartRichard LongA millionaire offers $10,000 to five people who agree to be locked in a large, spooky, rented house overnight with him and his wife.Obviously, it's difficult to truly appreciate this film today since it's the product of a very different era of filmmaking. William Castle's clever use of gimmicks and showmanship are difficult to quantify today, but if you use your imagination you'll probably find it more enjoyable. Even without those gimmicks, there's still a lot to enjoy- particularly if you enjoy Vincent Price. And, honestly, you should. 3/5