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samwinter
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Dune (2021)
Absolutely loved it!
It's so good to see this story being handled in the correct manner, the pacing was good (didn't feel rushed), the overall tone is spot on, wonderful cinematography, and as a 3D motion designer myself, the CGI elements were awesome and didn't feel out of place. Brilliant.
Brooklyn Nine-Nine: The Good Ones (2021)
Really?
Oh goody goody gum drops, another show that has decided it doesn't like viewers.
Shoe horning "woke" talking points in is bad enough, but when every other show on planet earth is doing the same thing, it's just adds itself to the grey malaise of drudgery.
Also, isn't this meant to be a comedy show? Someone should tell the writers.
Great episode guys, it actually let me know not to waste any further time on this show, congrats.
Sick of It (2018)
Oh! I can't believe he's written it down! F@$%&^&65!
Just finished watching all six episodes today, loved it. It's well written, got some good laughs and a lot of heart, and for someone who doesn't really consider themselves an actor, Karl is bloody good.
The Thinning (2016)
For a budget film not bad, but . . . .
Considering this obviously didn't have a huge Hollywood budget, it wasn't half bad, the premise was ok (even though it's been done to death) and the acting was pretty good. Only one thing let this film down, Logan Paul. Logan Paul and his mentally distracting chin, it's like the total opposite of Leafy is Here.
The Humanity Bureau (2017)
Totally Watchable
Ok Ok, some of the dialogue falls flat but all in all, not bad.
I find most child actors (with a few exceptions) annoying as hell, but the kid in this was alright. The premise of the film was pretty good too, i won't go into detail but if you wanna know what it's like living under the oppressive boot of communism check this out lolololol
For the budget definitely ok.
Star Wars: Episode VIII - The Last Jedi (2017)
This film gave me Aids
Where to start?
Well first off let me just say that I've never been a massive Star Wars fan, but i did enjoy the original trilogy when i saw them.
This film on the other hand is just embarrassing, it's full of cheesy crap, the one liners are cringe as hell, and the plot isn't much better.
I don't know who trained up the cast in the light saber department but Kylo Ren and Rey fought with all the finesse of a drunk ham sandwich with autism.
On a good note, the special effects were on point, very well done and created a great atmosphere, only to be ruined by a script written by the ghost of Helen Keller.
The ice foxes were dumb.
Oh, and what the hell was up with Luke? what a pathetic and stupid way to end his character after so many years of service to this franchise. Having him astral project himself across the galaxy just made him look like a massive pussy.
In conclusion i would rather drink a cup of my own piss while i burnt like Lukes parents than watch this again.
Teletubbies (1997)
Eh-Oh!
I watched all 425 episodes of this and now i wish i hadn't.
The show takes place in what is perceived by the Teletubbies as a lush green land, it is in fact a dystopian hellscape of which they are completely unaware.
The reason for their psychotic break? Well, the voice trumpets that appear everyday (an obvious metaphor for the government) gas them with psychoactive drugs, thus leaving the Teletubbies blissfully unaware of the broken landscape and the bones of their forefathers that surround them.
The sun baby played by the talented Jess Smith, obviously represents not only the high levels of radiation they live in (because of the bombs), but the cosmic rays they are exposed to on a daily basis because the war ruined the atmosphere.
The main shelter of the four Teletubbies is an "earth house", this is in fact an aging radiation shelter which is now infested with rats.
Now on to the characters, and this where my problems begin.
Tinky Winky is the more rotund of the group and could be construed as the alpha, especially as his triangular antenna is an obvious wink to the illuminati. He always carries a red bag, it's never explained why, and at the end of the series i felt like i had just finished watching lost.
Dipsy is one of the more interesting characters, his antenna is a nod to the growing sexual tension amongst our post apocalyptic survivors. He's stubborn and somewhat doesn't play by the rules. His face is notably darker than the rest of the Teletubbies which is a commentary on race.
Laa-Laa is the yellow one, she spends most of her time dicking about singing and dancing, she never pulls her weight, this custard colored ass-hat was a real sticking point for me.
now on to possibly the worst character in the series, Po.
Po seems very sweet on the surface, but below that sweet exterior is the burning rage of a thousand suns (hence the color red). Some say she was the one that pressed the button that started all of this, but between the witty retorts of "eh-oh" and "aaaaah" i just don't know what her motivation is! and after 425 episodes of this, i still don't! this one dimensional character really let the show down for me, and has ruined completely what could of been an in depth and multi-layered story.
Star Trek: Discovery (2017)
Star Rekt
Remember the fun of TNG or voyager? yeah well, you can take that memory, put it in the gutter, then pee all over it, because that is effectively what this series does.
It's obvious to anyone with half a brain cell that the social justice brigade have got hold of this, it's full of identity politics and collectivism, aka F@*king nonsense.
If you're thinking to yourself "it can't be that bad, can it?" Yes, yes it is.
A better alternative to watching this would be, taking out your eyeballs and filling the empty sockets with custard, then climbing into a preheated oven, crying custard as you slowly turn into sorrow pie.
The Hurt Locker (2008)
oh dear god.
I have no idea why this film is widely regarded as a great piece of work, it's so self congratulatory that it almost made me vomit, no seriously, it's up there with Pearl Harbor. Seeing and hearing this steaming pile made me jealous of Helen keller. The title of the film didn't make sense to me at first, but after it finished i realized it must be the nickname of the DVD case seen as it contains one of the most painful experiences I've ever had. I thought the story was presented in quite a simplistic manner, and i thought that the political aspects of the film were so dumbed down and reduced, the director might as well have been in the corner of the screen explaining the situation with sock puppets. So if you are considering watching this film, don't, a more fun alternative would be pissing in a condom, freezing it, and then f@*king yourself with it.