Cent-3 Reviews

Trip Out (2005)

Great Trip

[9/10 · 26 March 2008]

"Trip Out" tells three times from three perspectives the story of three guys who get blasted on drugs, each story filling in details of the events that transpired up to the fateful events later on in the film. It's not a complicated movie but it is very entertaining.

The dialog in this movie is hysterical - especially that of Colby, white thug wannabe, who mouths off without provocation to acquaintances and strangers alike. He's somehow friends with Richard, the most popular man in school, who berates and belittles Colby, sometimes too much. Richard's brother is Tommy, introverted outcast whose role in the movie goes from sad alienated youth to something surprisingly sinister.

Events in the movie play out smoothly, parts that involve two or more of the central characters that have already been witnessed are skipped over with smooth transitions. The characters progress in smart ways, gaining and losing the viewer's sympathy in unexpected ways.

"Trip Out" is a short ride but always fun - drug use, swearing and sex are all present in abundance, all set to a great soundtrack. None of the actors are famous but they do a fine job, as well as the director. All in all a quality picture - worth catching if you can find it.

Jason X (2001)

Evil gets an upgrade, audiences get a migraine

[27 August 2003]

"This sucks on so many levels," Janessa (Melyssa Ade) shouts while struggling to hold her grip as the ship's atmosphere is being sucked out into space. In one deft move, she describes her situation and the entire movie, Jason X.

In the future, Jason Voorhees is being studied in a lab. After nearly escaping, he is cryogenically frozen, only to be unleashed again. in the future. Four-hundred years later, things are very different: the Earth has been destroyed by pollution, people risk the lives of others for financial gain, and they cheat their way to the top by any means necessary (wait a minute, hold on.); the only difference is that scientists have now invented really bad CGI spaceships. Apparently they've also done a great job with genetic manipulation, because everybody is thin and beautiful, while fabric supplies must be very scarce in this dystopian vision, as clothing is skimpy and tight. The rest follows the formula - young actors and actresses engage in premarital intercourse, and Jason mercilessly slaughters each one.

Without any doubt, a viewer has to take this movie with a grain of salt - one can't go in expecting a thought-provoking, psychological thriller: "Wait, after four hundred years they still use machine guns?" What do you mean? The barrels of those things are much bigger. "Holy cow! The ship just plowed through an entire space station!" They never said anything about having autopilot in the future. "How come if they can bring Jason back to live after being blown into eight different pieces they can't restore the guy whose spine got broken?" Your guess is as good as mine.

All right, so what? The movie is crap! We can still laugh at how bad it is, right?

No, not really - the dialogue is crap, the effects cheap, the death scenes not particularly elaborate, and the plot rather predictable, but none of it is bad enough to really elicit a lot of laughter. One might shake his or her head, or roll the eyes, but that's it, with exception of one scene toward the end that held the movie's only moment of inspiration.

I won't spoil that one little morsel of entertainment - you'll just have to go waste your own money on this defecation of a film.

Jason X (2001)

Evil gets an upgrade, audiences get a migraine

[2 January 2003]

`This sucks on so many levels,' Janessa (Melyssa Ade) shouts while struggling to hold her grip as the ship's atmosphere is being sucked out into space. In one deft move, she describes her situation and the entire movie, Jason X.

In the future, Jason Voorhees is being studied in a lab. After nearly escaping, he is cryogenically frozen, only to be unleashed again. in the future. Four-hundred years later, things are very different: the Earth has been destroyed by pollution, people risk the lives of others for financial gain, and they cheat their way to the top by any means necessary (wait a minute, hold on.); the only difference is that scientists have now invented really bad CGI spaceships. Apparently they've also done a great job with genetic manipulation, because everybody is thin and beautiful, while fabric supplies must be very scarce in this dystopian vision, as clothing is skimpy and tight. The rest follows the formula - young actors and actresses engage in premarital intercourse, and Jason mercilessly slaughters each one.

Without any doubt, a viewer has to take this movie with a grain of salt - one can't go in expecting a thought-provoking, psychological thriller: `Wait, after four hundred years they still use machine guns?' What do you mean? The barrels of those things are much bigger. `Holy cow! The ship just plowed through an entire space station!' They never said anything about having autopilot in the future. `How come if they can bring Jason back to live after being blown into eight different pieces they can't restore the guy whose spine got broken?' Your guess is as good as mine.

All right, so what? The movie is crap! We can still laugh at how bad it is, right?

No, not really - the dialogue is shit, the effects cheap, the death scenes not particularly elaborate, and the plot rather predictable, but none of it is bad enough to really elicit a lot of laughter. One might shake his or her head, or roll the eyes, but that's it, with exception of one scene toward the end that held the movie's only moment of inspiration.

I won't spoil that one little morsel of entertainment - you'll just have to go waste your own money on this defecation of a film.

Friends (1994–2004)

Could this show BE any funnier?

[31 December 2002]

Could this show BE any funnier? Yeah, it probably could - but is it most deffinitely worth your time.

The one-liners and varied characters always lend a nice flavor to the humor, and while some of their material has gotten old in it's eighth and ninth season, it's grip on the coveted Thursday 8PM slot is far from slipping.

One thing I like is that even though there are story arcs in this series, many of the episodes stand independent of each other. Plot lines are carried out over several episodes, but it wouldn't be hard for a casual viewer to jump in and out.

'Friends' always delivers great laughs, every week; tune in and you won't regret it.

Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever (2002)

Ballistic fails in plot, succeeds in death, fire, and boredom

[1/10 · 21 September 2002]

"Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever" is a waste of time, but it could have been worse.

Antonio Banderas is an agent with a chronic problem of forgetting to shave, told that if he works on a mission to find some deadly technology, he might be given information as to the whereabouts of his wife, who he thought had died.

Lucy Liu is an independent killing machine with unclear intentions, but her job mostly consists of standing still, waiting for the last possible second to fire her grenade launcher, and to spill the ammunition of every gun in the ten mile radius.

Had the makers of this movie cared about plot, their premise might have made for a truly intriguing film instead of an explosion bonanza flick.

To make things worse, not all of the special effects were up to par with modern cinema - scenes in the beginning are grainy, the martial art stunts in the end look like they were still practicing them, the car chase induces drowsiness, and some of the sound effects used would fail to active a Clapper.

There are some worthwhile moments: a drop of comic relief, a "let's do this for shock value" slow-motion view of a sniper falling from a building into a car, and of course, a body-count that would put Pol Pot to shame.

Still, it's not the bottom of the barrel. Go out and rent 'The Mask of Zorro' for action, comedy, and Antonio Banderas. Go out and rent "Charlie's Angels" for action, comedy, and Lucy Liu.

Go out and sleep on a park bench, for a more pleasant and rewarding experience than seeing "Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever."

Impostor (2001)

Tolerable Sci-Fi Flick

[6/10 · 5 January 2002]

These days there seem to be science-fiction movies popping up right and left. Some of them are good, some of them are bad, and some are ho-hum run of the mill. Impostor belongs to the latter category.

Spencer Olham (Gary Sinise) is accused of being a walking bomb made by enemy aliens the world are at war with. Since the bomb can't be traced by any normal means, he seems to have no way to prove he is the human he claims to be.

Although the plot has promise (as it is based on a short story) it is not enough for a feature-length film. Although the acting by Sinise and D'onofrio is not too bad, Stowe could have been more convincing as Spencer's wife. The special effects are well done, and they were not garish or gratuitous. However, the film tedious; aside from the twist at the end, the majority of the movie is extremely predictable.

'Impostor' would be good to see if there was nothing else playing in theaters, and science-fiction fans will mildly enjoy it. Otherwise, there are better movies one can spend their time on.

Fight Club (1999)

Eye-opening masterpiece

[10/10 · 25 December 2001]

A person as enthralled with Fight Club as myself could write several pages on how terrific this film was. The ideas presented in this work are not just some testosterone induced fantasy - they are very real prospects presented via rather radical means. Our world is in trouble today, and Fight Club does an astounding job of shedding light on these issues. The acting, the dialogue, the direction, they were all fantastic. The action was good, but it is not what made this movie what it was - the brains behind the story are what bring it up into the shining light that is good film production. If any of you reading this are all happy about the BMW you drive, the Armani you wear, or the four story mansion you live in, see Fight Club and learn a lesson. This movie was made for you whether you enjoy it or not.

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

True to the book, a spectacle of film-making

[10/10 · 25 December 2001]

I finished reading Fellowship of the Ring a mere 4 hours before I went to see the movie. When I finally saw the film I was dazzled - it was brilliant in every way. However, I was unable to really soil myself upon viewing - it was not that I knew the story and everything that was about to happen, but that the book was so fantastic in itself! My advice would be to see the movie, and the read the book so that you get a good feeling for everything that was left out. Still, having read the book first it was great to see the same great lines and scenes rendered into motion picture so faithfully; some of the fights may have been more drawn out for the moviegoer, but I can't complain. The beginning of the movie felt a bit rushed, but with already having +3 hours of movie, I could understand them cutting out certain parts. See this movie, again and again and again - it is worth your time. If you come out at the end saying, "Huh? What? How does it end?" then I recommend you read the books - it's going to be another year until we have another movie of this magnitude released.

Pearl Harbor (2001)

2nd worst movie of the summer

[3/10 · 16 December 2001]

This was absolutely abysmal. I wish somebody told me when the half hour of action was about to take place, so I could have taken timed naps. Better yet, I wish I had just not wasted any time on this overblown, overhyped, overcasted, and overacted drivel. The plot of the surrounding characters was so formulaic I actually got the image of monkeys sitting at typewriters. All of the hype lead me to believe that this was going to be next in the line with Full Metal Jacket, Apocalypse Now, and Saving Private Ryan. How wrong, how terribly terribly wrong! The action was pretty good, but it could not nearly justify spending two hours sitting through the pointless Titanicesque junk. I'm not sure which fell asleep first - me or my butt. Save yourself some time and just go rent Saving Private Ryan again - that had a great story, good acting, and superb effects. I always wonder why Matt Damon wasn't in this movie besides Ben Affleck - I guess he knows which war movies to make and which to skip.

The One (2001)

Waste of time and money

[3/10 · 13 December 2001]

I wish I had time to go on about how bad this movie was, but I am pressed for time. I'll make it short and sweet: The action, although well done, did not require Jet Li's talent - Julia Roberts could have made this movie with all of effects they used. The plot was simply ridiculous - it seems they tried to find a way to explain why Jet Li would/could fight himself (because it would look cool) and failed miserably. The average Joe on the street could fart out a better story. The acting was just plain terrible.

Don't waste any money on this movie - don't even rent it. If they show it on an airplane, take a nap. Go see Kiss of the Dragon, Li's action movie which came out in July 2001. KotD was really amazing, with spectacular scenes, a great ending, and high quality everything throughout.

This movie is what you get when producers have an interesting concept, but nothing to back it up.

Mission to Mars (2000)

Hits home as a solidly great sci-fi movie

[7/10 · 10 March 2000]

In this day and age of computer generated eye candy, it is very common to see movies that are based solely on special effects and nothing else. Movies like Wing Commander have great graphics, but the story line and acting leave you back at the ticket booth.

Mission to Mars does not fit in this category. When I saw previews, the special effects looked great, but I could also tell that there was a plot to this movie. For once, I was right on the mark. Mission to Mars made you think about what was happening and what the consequences were going to be. The suspense takes a firm grip on one's eyelids and pulls them up to the ceiling.

What truly makes this movie stand above others of its ilk is the great acting of the characters. In sci-fi shoot 'em ups, the viewer develops a way of not caring for the characters, as they are uncreative and inflexible. Mission to Mars made me care about every single character; I was eagerly awaiting every twist and relished every event.

The climax (which I will not at all spoil) was hair raising and at the end extremely satisfying. Upon leaving the theater I quickly realised that I haven't seen a better movie all year.

I give every recommendation I know to go see this movie. And, by the way, look out for some foreshadowing. It's in there.

Can't Hardly Wait (1998)

Timing is everything...

[7/10 · 27 June 1999]

I am half going through what Preston was in the movie. Except I gave the girl the note and told her not to read it until tomorrow, and instead I told her everything on it three days later, so she's not as clueless as Hewitt's character was...

Anyway, the movie. It meant a lot to me, but was also really funny and really great. The stereotypes couldn't have been more stereotypical, and the ending couldn't have been more predictable, but that's what made it great. We knew what we wanted to happen, and eventually, in a mixed up sorta way, it did. That's only half of what made it great, though. There was a surprise even with the predictability: Seth Green's character. Lauren Ambrose's character did a great job of bringing it out, while her's, although well developed, had loads more to offer. Hewitt had a smaller role than expected (as said in an earlier comment) . I actually found a great deal of symbolism, like an angel showing Preston the way... Unexpected for a teen hormone flick. (I was at a party last night, and we were talking about G-d and philosophy on the Holocaust, not about what college girls would be like). I know exactly where the nerd was coming from, making all the devious plots and whatnot. I'm glad I grew outta that part of my life... The other two guys talking on the roof was REALLY funny, and even the "we're G-d's salt..." bit was great. And the "I don't wanna be Grand Moff Tarkin!" Heh heh. The part where Preston was thinking that it wasn't meant to be was the exact way I had dealt with things like that, it was a real eye opener that people think a lot like me sometimes. I just didn't have the ending that Preston did, but then again, I'm not on my way to Boston so there is still hope...

I hope you enjoyed my ramblings. Whether you liked them or not, SEE THIS MOVIE! Guaranteed to make you smile, even if you still shake your head in disgust at the thought of watching it.