- [regarding her relationship with Michael]
- Jan Levinson: Why is this so hard? That's what she said. Oh, my God, what am I saying?
- David Wallace: This was a gift from Lee Iacocca. Twenty-year-old single-malt scotch.
- Michael Scott: Here is to Mr. Iacocca and his failed experiment, the DeLorean.
- Michael Scott: [to Jan] If this is about what happened in the bathroom, there was no space to cuddle.
- Michael Scott: A lot of people think that magic camp is just for kids. And that's why so many other people in my class were kids. Self-fulfilling prophecy. It's um, it's really for anybody with a dream and a belief in magic and a little extra time after school.
- Creed Bratton: [Many underage people shaking his hand] I run a small fake ID company from my car with a laminating machine that I swiped from the Sheriff's station.
- Pam Beesly: I want us to make it. I want a fresh start.
- Roy: That's awesome. That's what I want.
- Pam Beesly: Oh, ok, but in order for us to make it, there can't be any secrets between us.
- Roy: I didn't do anything. Ask anyone, I totally could have and I didn't at all.
- Pam Beesly: Just listen. Remember that casino night about a month before we were supposed to get married? I kissed Jim.
- Roy: What?
- Pam Beesly: He told me how he felt and I guess I had feelings too, and we kissed.
- Roy: Jim came on to you?
- Pam Beesly: Just listen...
- Roy: No, I am listening! That's the problem, I am listening!
- Pam Beesly: Don't yell!
- Roy: Don't yell?
- Pam Beesly: This is over.
- Roy: Yeah, you're right. This is so over. You kidding me, Pam? Come on! God!