Xena: Warrior Princess (TV Series)

Punch Lines (2000)

Alexandra Tydings: Aphrodite

Quotes 

• Aphrodite : [materializing behind Gabrielle]  Boo!

  Gabrielle : Aphrodite?

  Aphrodite : Can't sleep, huh?

  Gabrielle : You scared me.

  Aphrodite : Sorry, I didn't know I had to *knock* in my own temple.

  Gabrielle : You don't, but can you just keep it down, I don't want to wake Xena.

  Aphrodite : Pregnant girl need her rest, huh? I remember when Cupid was on his way...

  Gabrielle : Uh, doesn't a god of your obvious stature have anything better to do than hang out here in the middle of the night?

  Aphrodite : Owwie. What's with the attitude? I let you sleep in my temple. I show real concern for your insomnia, and you treat me like I'm a rash where the sun don't shine.

• Aphrodite : So you shrunk her horse, big deal. Everybody shrinks as they get older. That's why old people are so short.

  Gabrielle : Now that's very constructive. What are you writing?

  Aphrodite : Patient is hostile and insecure, possibly masking some latent tendencies.

  Gabrielle : This is stupid.

  Aphrodite : No, I'm sorry. Look. No more scroll, alright?

  Gabrielle : Latent tendencies? Where did you learn to talk like that?

  Aphrodite : Honey, don't let the blonde hair fool you. Although bombastic forms of circumlocution should be generally avoided, one mustn't shy away from big words in the right context.

  Gabrielle : What?

• Aphrodite : So, let me ask you this. Isn't all this story-telling an awful lot like writing?

  Gabrielle : It's similar, but with writing, it's like talking to yourself. It's a way that you can work things out. Of course, I know now exactly who I am.

  Aphrodite : So then who cares? Why write?

  Gabrielle : Haven't you ever had an artistic impulse that's like a bad itch, and you just have to keep working on it until you get it out?