Mork & Mindy (TV Series)
Mork Goes Erk (1979)
Tom Poston: Mr. Bickley
Quotes
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Susan : ERK teaches you how to love yourself.
Franklin Delano Bickley : I bet you got an A.
Susan : A+!
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Franklin Delano Bickley : I was blaming it on you, but it's time I faced it. I've lost it.
Mork : Well, we can form a posse and find it, if you want!
Franklin Delano Bickley : [glares at him] No, it's no use. They say your sympathy is the first thing to go. I used to be able to get tears out of a coat rack. Not anymore. Listen to this: "Your pet rabbit died / Poor little Muffet! / Your two choices are: / Eat it or stuff it."
[Mork thinks a real rabbit has died]
Mork : Aw, that's sad!
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Mindy McConnell : Mr. Bickley, you're just going through a writer's slump. Mork is leaving for good!
Franklin Delano Bickley : Look, sister, Little Muffet ain't coming back, either.
Mork : Oh. None of us has a reason to be happy now.
Franklin Delano Bickley : [helping himself to their drinks] I'll drink to that.
[Susan bursts through the door, all smiles]
Susan : Knock, knock, knock!
[Her smile fades. Mork is slumped over, rubbing his ear. Mindy is slumped over, shading her eyes because of tears. Bickley is leaning on the counter, burying himself in a drink]
Susan : Well, what a group. Hear No Evil, See No Evil, and Feel No Pain. What's wrong with you people?
Franklin Delano Bickley : I've lost my talent.
Mindy McConnell : Mork is leaving.
Mork : The rabbit died.
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Susan : You people have got to get ERK!
Franklin Delano Bickley : You've been irking me since you came in.
Susan : Mindy, listen. ERK would help you with your depression. And Mr. Bickley, you know, you could use some help with your drinking.
Franklin Delano Bickley : I drink fine by myself.
Susan : Oh, and Mork, I bet he could come up with something for you.
Mork : Yeah. That sounds exciting. Come on, Mindy!
[taking her hands and leaping up]
Mork : Let's not poop the party!