Frasier (TV Series)
Moon Dance (1996)
John Mahoney: Martin Crane
Quotes
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Martin : When I was separated from your mother, there was this pretty coroner in the city morgue. I always had a bit of a crush on her. So whenever we'd find a dead body, I'd yell out, "OK boys, I'll take it from here!" So one night, I invited her down to the corner bar.
Niles : Coroners have their own bars?
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Martin : You know, it wouldn't hurt you to go out a little bit every once in a while too.
Niles : If you're suggesting that I start dating, you can save your breath. Women don't exactly find me irresistible.
Martin : Oh, come on, Niles. You've had lots of girlfriends.
Niles : Oh, let's count. There's Maris.
[Long pause]
Niles : Oh, Dora, my childhood pen pal from Costa Rica.
[Another pause]
Niles : I seem to recall a little girl in the fourth grade who lured me to a stairwell to show me her underpants.
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Niles : This morning I spoke to Marta, my ex-maid and current mole. She reports that Broadwater is just the latest in a parade of escorts. The gigolos are swarming around Maris like ants on a Snickers bar!
Martin : Well, wait a minute, that's good news. If she's seeing a whole bunch of people, that means she's not serious about anyone.
Niles : You think?
Martin : Yeah, sure! They're probably just her escorts. You know how she loves going to parties.
Niles : Yes. And she never liked going anywhere alone. Except to bed.