Alias (2001–2006)
Michael Vartan: Michael Vaughn
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Quotes
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[Sydney and Vaughn walk into Syd's apartment, Vaughn's cell phone rings]
Vaughn : Hello?
Agent Eric Weiss : Hey, Kendall has something he wants to show you.
Vaughn : Ah, can it wait?
Agent Eric Weiss : Apparently not, he wants to Sydney too. Are you with her?
Vaughn : Ah, no. I haven't seen her.
Agent Eric Weiss : You're in bed with her right now, aren't you?
Vaughn : Trying. Just find out what he wants.
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[talking about Sydney]
Weiss : So she gave you a drawer, huh?
Vaughn : It was a gesture of convenience.
Weiss : And, uh, what did you put it in?
Vaughn : Why do you care?
Weiss : What do you mean, why do I care? Do you know how spoiled you are? You know, a drawer! I wish I had a girlfriend to say 'Hey, do you want a drawer?'
Vaughn : I'll give you a drawer at my place.
Weiss : I don't want a drawer at your place.
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Vaughn : Even though everything's changed... some things don't... I'm not going to lose you twice.
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Vaughn : Are you romantically interested in anyone?
[She looks at him weirdly]
Vaughn : It could be a question.
Sydney : No, I'm not.
[Machine jumps to 56]
Vaughn : Interesting.
Sydney : Wait, ask me that again.
Vaughn : No, I don't have to. We have our answer right here. That's very good. Moving on.
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Sydney : Hi. How did you find me?
Vaughn : You told me a couple of months ago that when you feel the need to disappear, you go to the observatory. But the observatory was closed. And then I remembered you said the pier calms you down. But you weren't there. And you weren't at the bluffs and the palisades, either.
Sydney : You didn't really go to all those places.
Vaughn : Yeah, I did. And then I remembered you liked the train station, too. Normal people going to their normal jobs.
Sydney : I can't believe you remember that.
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[Vaughn and Weiss watch as a sleazy bad guy leers at Sydney while she's in disguise as a prostitute]
Vaughn : That son of a bitch!
Weiss : Easy, come on.
Vaughn : I swear I'm gonna to kill this guy.
Weiss : There's no way that guy smells as good as you do.
Vaughn : It's aftershave, I got a new aftershave.
Weiss : Yeah, well, I'd lighten up on it a little.
Vaughn : Yeah?
Weiss : Oh yeah. To the point of non-use.
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[Marshall is offered a job with the real CIA]
Vaughn : Hi, I'm Michael Vaughn. Welcome to the CIA.
Agent Marshall Flinkman : Uh, yeah I've heard that one before.
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Sydney : Is something wrong?
Vaughn : No. I'm just getting old, I guess.
Sydney : You expect me to believe that?
Vaughn : I've just had a lot on my mind lately, that's all. It'll pass.
Sydney : Yesterday was the day, wasn't it? The anniversary of your father's death?
Vaughn : How could you remember that?
Sydney : I remember what missing him does to you.
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Vaughn : I hate you but I love Sydney more, thats the only reason you're not dying tonight.
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Vaughn : I'm going to say something, and it will either be obvious to you or seem presumptuous, either way I'm going to say it. This isn't working. I've been thinking about this for a while, I don't know what the hell to do.
Sydney : What?
Vaughn : I think you know what.
Sydney : I need you to tell me.
Vaughn : You need me to tell you what, that when you're on operations I can't sleep at night, that when we're in debrief I have to force myself to remember what the hell we're supposed to be reviewing when all I want to do is kiss you.
Sydney : Sometimes it is hard to remember what we're supposed to be talking about.
Vaughn : That's what I'm talking about, and the thing that drives me insane every day is that the people who would kill us if we were ever seen together-the Alliance, SD-6, Sloane, are the very forces that brought you into my life. What kind of a sick joke is that?
Sydney : So what are you thinking, that maybe we shouldn't be working together?
Vaughn : Yes, that was what I was thinking, but we're great together, and the more we work together the sooner the Alliance gets destroyed.
Sydney : So, what are you suggesting?
[Agent Weiss interrupts]
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Vaughn : [to Sydney] No, but, what you said about wanting to go to a hockey game... wanting me to be part of your life... I think I wasn't clear about something. That it would be nice to be in public with you, to actually get to look at you. Grab a pizza or go to a hockey game. I just... I wasn't clear that I would really like that, too.
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Vaughn : [to Sydney] When you're at your absolute lowest, at your most depressed, just remember that you can always... you know. You got my number.
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Weiss : Hey, you sure you don't want to talk about this?
Vaughn : There's nothing to talk about.
Weiss : I share my fights with you.
Vaughn : No you don't.
Weiss : Yeah I do. Remember when Alan pissed in the living room?
Vaughn : That was your dog!
Weiss : Yeah, but I was angry about it and I let you know how upset I was.
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[Weiss has just prompted Vaughn to finally ask Sydney out on a date while on a mission in Nice]
Weiss : And?
Vaughn : We're going to dinner.
[Weiss breaks into a celebratory dance]
Vaughn : I'm going to keep my comm channel open. I need you to monitor the RF frequency.
Weiss : Got it. Okay, in exchange I get an eclair.
Vaughn : No, I'm serious, any suspect signal and I want to know about it. Anything.
Weiss : If they're small, bring at least two!
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[Sydney and Vaughn are returning to the US from a mission in Russia]
Vaughn : You know, we have operational command of this aircraft. The pilot could take us anywhere we want...
Sydney : [playfully scolding] Our orders are to proceed with our extraction. If we were divert this aircraft for our personal use, we would get into a lot of trouble.
Vaughn : Yes.
Sydney : [disappointed] Yeah...
Vaughn : Wanna have dinner with me in Paris?
Sydney : [without hesitating] Absolutely.
[they kiss]
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Agent Eric Weiss : Did you ever stop to think that the reason you and Sydney work so well together is because of the feelings you have for each other?
[pause]
Agent Eric Weiss : How's that for spin?
Vaughn : Pretty good.
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[after Sydney asks if he is married]
Vaughn : Wife? I don't have a wife. You thought I was married this whole time?
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[Vaughn is watching Syndey seduce an obese enemy agent]
Vaughn : I'm going to kill that guy.
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Vaughn : Yeah... I'll break into the Vatican with you.
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[Vaughn is beating a punching bag, obviously angry]
Agent Eric Weiss : The bag is dead, I think you can stop now.
Vaughn : Thanks for coming.
Agent Eric Weiss : Thanks for sweating.
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Vaughn : I hate you - but I love Sydney more. Which is why you're not dying tonight.
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Vaughn : You asked me some questions. I told you I'd answer them if you helped me. You did help me. And I thank you for that.
Irina : I didn't do it for you.
Vaughn : I'm trying to live a normal life... which was always hard, given what I do. But it's gotten harder since I met your daughter. It's not that knowing her hasn't made my life better. It has. But it's also made it that much worse... I think I've said enough.
Irina : The problem, Mr. Vaughn... Is that to the one person who matters... You haven't said anything at all.
Vaughn : Listen, this may not mean anything to you, this may not be something you understand, or appreciate, but we have rules. Very clear, important rules that govern the relationship between a handler and his asset.
Irina : And between a man and a woman?
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Irina : [Vaughn has come to ask a favor of Irina] Tell me how you feel about my daughter.
Vaughn : That's none of your business.
Irina : Are you in love with her?
Vaughn : I don't know why that matters.
Irina : [cutting him off] I don't have the advantage of observing casual behavior... I'm curious.
Vaughn : Help me... and I'll tell you what you want to know.
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Vaughn : Half a can only. I don't want to come back to a fat dog.
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Vaughn : Now, the guys say it's bitchin, so I assume it's... bitchin.
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C.I.A. Therapist Dr. Judy Barnett : Did you purchase a Christmas gift for Agent Bristow?
Vaughn : Uh... I'm not familiar, Dr. Barnett, with the regulations preventing officers from celebrating with their co-workers, a fairly widely recognized holiday such as Christmas.
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Vaughn : Noah Hicks - you mentioned him in the initial background report you wrote when you first made contact with the CIA.
Sydney : We met when I was a trainee. We actually dated for a while.
Vaughn : Really.
Sydney : We kept it under the radar. SD-6 discourages, you know, fraternization among agents.
Vaughn : So does the CIA.
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Weiss : How are you doing?
Vaughn : Fine.
Weiss : Hey, guess what? It's me. Come on, how're you doing?
Vaughn : I'm hanging in there.
Weiss : How's Lauren about it?
Vaughn : She didn't remember.
Weiss : And, you didn't say anything?
Vaughn : No. I mean, she's got a lot on her mind.
Weiss : Yeah, that's probably it.
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Lauren : Michael, what are you doing?
[Vaughn looks at her phone]
Vaughn : Sometimes I hate my job.
Lauren : Baby, what's going on?
Vaughn : You know how doctors always make you wait?
Lauren : What?
Vaughn : When you go in for an appointment. My dad hated that. He used to say he'd always kept his appointments, and everyone else should do the same.
Lauren : You okay?
Vaughn : Yeah. I just... I was looking for my house keys and I found this.
[shows her the watch]
Lauren : Why? Were you looking for your house keys?
Vaughn : I couldn't sleep. I thought I'd go for a jog.
Lauren : What time is it?
Vaughn : I dunno. It's broken.
Lauren : Are you sure you're all right?
Vaughn : Yeah, I'm fine.
[they kiss]
Vaughn : I'll see you later.