The Royle Family (1998–2012)
Ralf Little: Antony Royle
Photos
Quotes
-
Dave Best : 'Ey, I'm rough today, me, me guts are well off, I had a bad pint last night.
Jim Royle : I bet you washed them down with a few more, though, didn't you?
Antony Royle : How d'ya know if it's a bad pint?
Dave Best : Cos you can shit through the eye of a needle.
Jim Royle : Where did you go?
Dave Best : Pear Tree.
Jim Royle : Bloody hell, you don't wanna drink in there.
Dave Best : Well, I know that now, don't I?
Jim Royle : Bloody hell. He doesn't clean his pumps him.
Antony Royle : No, actually the lager's all right.
Jim Royle : How would you know, soft lad?
Antony Royle : Dad, I'm 15.
Jim Royle : 'Ey! Listen, if I ever catch you in The Feathers, I'll clip you round the bloody ear, you do not shit on your own doorstep!
Dave Best : I nearly did last night, I couldn't get the key in quick enough.
-
Barbara Royle : [talking about Cheryl] Have you asked her to be bridesmaid?
Denise Royle : Aw, yeah, aw, she was thrilled.
Jim Royle : Bridesmaid, my arse, she'll look like a bloody Easter egg on legs.
Antony Royle : Yeah, and the only reason you're having her as a bridesmaid is to make you look better.
Denise Royle : Get lost, Antony!
Barbara Royle : Is she really on a diet?
Denise Royle : Yeah.
Barbara Royle : D'ya think she'll ever get married?
Antony Royle : Who'd have her?
Jim Royle : Stevie Wonder.
Antony Royle : [laughs] Yeah.
-
Barbara Royle : Antony, take that chicken out to the bins, will you, love? That chicken will start to stink if we leave it out.
Antony Royle : Mam, I've just sat down,
[points at Jim]
Antony Royle : what about lazy-arse here?
Barbara Royle : 'Ey! There's to much swearing in this house.
[turns to Jim]
Barbara Royle : That's you, that is, Jim, you've taught him that!
Jim Royle : Taught him my arse!
-
Antony Royle : Who's stunk that toilet out?
Barbara Royle : Who d'ya think?
Jim Royle : Well, that's what it's for isn't it? Where d'you expect me to shit? You'd soon have something to worry about if I crapped in the kitchen.
-
Barbara Royle : Get the door, will ya, Antony?
Antony Royle : I have to do everything around here!
Jim Royle : It's probably Snow White looking for you, Grumpy!