I will never apologize for absolutely loving the rock-solid hilarious Elvira: Mistress of the Dark feature film. I won't even label it as a "guilty pleasure;" I have no guilt in my pleasure in laughing out loud every time I watch this.
Actually, it's probably been two decades since I last viewed this and though I remember watching it back then repeatedly, this viewing brought back everything. I could all-but recite every line, every joke and see everything coming two chapters ahead. And that's not a bad thing; I still laughed out loud all over again in a movie that's 25-years-old this September.
(And speaking of which – where is the 25th Anniversary BluRay Special Edition for this absolute classic?)
It helps that I used to watch her show, about her hosting and commenting on terribly bad and unintentionally hilarious B-movies, live – and watched it for different reasons most boys did my age. It also helps that I transitioned, following her, into Mystery Science Theater 3000. But, none of that accounts for the full-movie she helped write here. In fact, aside from the opening act (the set-up,) a few mentions of movies she likes, a brief live-edition in the midsection and the spoof of making a movie mimicking her B-movies, the movie really stands on its own.
Yeah, that didn't come out right. But, what I mentioned was only part of the whole experience. And though it's not entirely based on an original idea, Cassandra Peterson's Elvira has such great wit, delivery and charisma, it makes the old setup fresh and very funny.
Elvira's fired from her show (see description above) and lucks out with "perfect timing" of her Great Aunt's passing and an inheritance that might fund her Las Vegas' Flamingo show. (Which, by the way, I would die to see
)
Breaking down, her car that is, in a small, obviously Red State kind of town, she must spend a few days reinventing the locales to her "big" – ha – city ways.
To add in the elements of her B-movie story come to life, there's the evil Uncle who needs a witchy book of dear, ole Great Aunt to have supreme power. Will Elvira, and her new followers, be able to stop such a warlock?
In truth, and as stated it's been approximately 20 years since I last saw this, I didn't know I would still roll with laughter. Also, I didn't think I'd see her as a hypocrite: constantly she flirts, flaunts her huge
attributes and then bashes whoever makes a sexual move toward her. I did think she was a hypocrite, until it made sense: She was mocking, very cleverly, indeed, women who either have big breasts, or buy them, make advances and then shuns those who take the bait. Smart girl. Cassandra, that is.
Anyhoo, this movie meant a lot to me growing up. It defined a lot of my own humor and I still, to this day, use the lines in my every day routines. There are so many to mention, but the number one quote I unabashedly repeat constantly:
"Hey, does anyone know what that movie was about? I'll tell yah what it was about: it was about an hour and a half too long!" - Elvira
(Technically, when I don't like a movie, or just wanna make someone laugh, and they ask me: "What was that movie about anyways?" I respond: "'Bout an hour and a half too long!" Or, whatever the length was.)
If you liked those small-town, road trip antic films, like To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar, you'd love this. I believe it holds up strongly today and sadly, so do a lot of the ignorant behaviors initially shown here in this film.
And until next time, (un)pleasant dreams.
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