My Fair Lady (1964)
Wilfrid Hyde-White: Colonel Hugh Pickering
Photos
Quotes
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : I'll have you know, Doolittle, that Mr. Higgins' intentions are entirely honorable!
Alfred P. Doolittle : Oh, 'course they are, guv'nor. If I thought they wasn't, I'd ask fifty.
Professor Henry Higgins : [shocked] You mean to say you'd sell your daughter for fifty pounds?
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Have you NO morals, man?
Alfred P. Doolittle : Nah. Nah, can't afford 'em, guv'nor. Neither could you, if you was as poor as me.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : Are you a man of good character where women are concerned?
Professor Henry Higgins : Have you ever met a man of good character where women are concerned?
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Yes, very frequently.
Professor Henry Higgins : Well, I haven't. I find that the moment a woman makes friends with me she becomes jealous, exacting, suspicious, and a damn nuisance. And I find that the moment I make friends with a woman I become selfish and tyrannical. So here I am, a confirmed old bachelor and likely to remain so.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : Higgins, at a time like this, it's positively indecent that you don't need a glass of port.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : [on telephone to Scotland Yard] No, she's no relation, no. What? Well, just let's call her a "good friend," shall we? I beg your pardon! Listen to me, my man, I don't like the tenor of that question - what we do with her is our affair - your affair is bringing her back so we can continue doing it!
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[repeated line]
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Well, I'm dashed!
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : How do you do it, may I ask?
Professor Henry Higgins : Simple phonetics. The science of speech. That's my profession. Also my hobby. Anyone can spot an Irishman or a Yorkshireman by his brogue, but I can place a man within six miles. I can place him within two miles in London. Sometimes within two streets.
Eliza Doolittle : Ought to be ashamed of himself, unmanly coward.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Is there a living in that?
Professor Henry Higgins : Oh, yes, quite a fat one.
Eliza Doolittle : Let him mind his own business and leave a poor girl.
Professor Henry Higgins : Woman! Cease this detestable boohooing instantly, or else seek the shelter of some other place of worship.
Eliza Doolittle : I have a right to be here if I like, same as you.
Professor Henry Higgins : A woman who utters such disgusting and depressing noises has no right to be anywhere. No right to live. Remember that you're a human being with a soul and the divine gift of articulate speech. That your native language is the language of Shakespeare and Milton and the Bible. Don't sit there crooning like a bilious pigeon.
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Eliza Doolittle : [suspicious about her father showing up at Higgins' residence] 'Ere, what did 'e come for?
Professor Henry Higgins : Say your vowels.
Eliza Doolittle : I know me vowels. I knew 'em before I come.
Professor Henry Higgins : Well, if you know them, say them.
Eliza Doolittle : [with her thick accent] Ai, Eh, Aye, Ow, U.
Professor Henry Higgins : Stop!
[enunciating clearly]
Professor Henry Higgins : A, E, I, O, U.
Eliza Doolittle : That's what I said, Ai, Eh, Aye, Ow, U. That's what I've been sayin' for three days and I won't say 'em no more.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : I know it's difficult, Miss Doolittle, but try to understand.
Professor Henry Higgins : There's no use explaining, Pickering. As a military man, you ought to know that. Drilling is what she needs. Now, you leave her alone or she'll be turning to you for sympathy.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : Higgins, forgive the bluntness, but if I'm to be in this business, I shall feel responsible for the girl. I hope it's clearly understood that no advantage is to be taken of her position.
Professor Henry Higgins : What, that thing?
[chuckling]
Professor Henry Higgins : Sacred, I assure you.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : Higgins, if there's any mishap at the embassy tonight, if Miss Doolittle suffers any embarrassment, whatever, it'll be on your head alone.
Professor Henry Higgins : Oh, Eliza can do anything.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Suppose she's discovered? Remember Ascot? Suppose she makes another ghastly mistake?
Professor Henry Higgins : There'll be no horses at the ball, Pickering.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : Think how agonizing it would be. Oh, if anything happened tonight, I don't know what I'd do.
Professor Henry Higgins : Well, you could always re-join your regiment.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : This is no time for flippancy, Higgins. The way you've driven the girl the last six weeks has exceeded all bounds of common decency. For God's sake, can you stop pacing up and down? Can't you settle somewhere?
Professor Henry Higgins : Have some port. It'll quieten your nerves.
Colonel Hugh Pickering : I'm not nervous. Where is it?
Professor Henry Higgins : On the piano.
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Colonel Hugh Pickering : Higgins!
Professor Henry Higgins : Pickering!