Hitsuzen Reviews

Kingdom of Heaven (2005)

Moving in places, but it's been done before, and it's been done better.

[5/10 · 22 May 2005]

The mere mention of the name "Ridley Scott" immediately ignites a spark of interest in most moviegoers. He's best know for his epics, after all, and the general mood during the lead up to the release of Kingdom of Heaven reached palpable anticipation.

"He made Gladiator... what could possibly go wrong?" A few things, actually. But before we come to those, let's examine the good points.

The narrative itself is very well done. The equal and fair treatment of the story between the sides of Saladin and Balian/Godfrey/Baldwin isn't a struggle between evil and good (respectively), but a war that was inevitable, due to the strong religious beliefs of both sides. The scenery is breathtaking, too, so when the plot slips for a moment, your eyes needn't miss out on anything, they'll still have something pretty to look at.

The main point of criticism comes with Orlando Bloom's lacklustre portrayal of simple blacksmith, Balian. Personally, I don't think Bloom was ready to take on the role of a leading man. His facial features in each scene were stone cold, and his voice a monotone.

And then there's the battle scene. I say scene, because there is only one, and it seems to last forever. Comparisons to the Lord of the Rings' Minas Tirith and Helm's Deep are fully justified... one just wonders whether directors are running out of creative ideas for battle sequences. After Peter Jackson's work, nothing seems to fully impress.

All in all, Kingdom of Heaven isn't atrociously bad. Go and see it for the spectacle of the settings, the haunting music, and Ed Norton's (surprisingly uncredited) performance as Baldwin, the Lepper King, if nothing else.

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (2005)

This movie is Mostly Harmless...

[9/10 · 25 April 2005]

It's a known fact that the movie adaptation of Hitchhiker's has been up in the air for some years now. Passing from the hands of one director to the next (James Cameron, Spike Jonze and Jay Roach), it wasn't until the idea landed in front of Garth Jennings and Nick Goldsmith that things truly started to take shape.

Douglas Adams died from a heart attack in 2001, but after reading the books, watching the film and drawing a comparison, it's clear that Adams would've accepted this adaptation of the TV series of the computer game of the radio series wholeheartedly.

Martin Freeman is an inspired choice as the face of Arthur Dent. He's an everyman, his slightly vacant, permanently confused facial expression (which we've all come to recognise from his role in The Office), truly becoming from a man who's trying to make sense of what's Out There, which happens to be similar to, though on a slightly larger scale than what's Down Here. And stupider.

Admittedly, it would've been nice to see more English talent taking on the roles from Adams' well loved creation. Steven Fry is THE Guide, the quintessential voice of logic and good-humoured reasoning in the Universe. Bill Nighy makes a great Slartibartfast, coming across as the kindly, if a little absent minded, genius that I've always imagined. And Alan Rickman providing his nasal drones to Marvin the Paranoid Android worked to near perfection.

That's not to say that the American cast isn't great. Mos Def and Zooey Deschanel are excellent as Ford Prefect and Trillian, but it's obvious that it's Sam Rockwell who's having all the fun, relishing his role as the over-excitable, reminiscently hippie-rockstar Ex-President of the Galaxy, Zaphod Beeblebrox.

So all in all, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a great experience. Non-Adamites will love it, as will the die hard fans. It's such a shame that its creator had to bow out before his beloved creation came to life, but due to his input into the movie script (the character Humma Kavula, played by John Malkovich, was written by him especially for the movie), his enthusiasm still lives on.

Want to go to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe now, please.

Hitch (I) (2005)

Will Smith in a romantic comedy? It's surprisingly good. No, really!

[7/10 · 25 April 2005]

Hitch is something of a departure from what we're usually used to seeing in a Will Smith acting in. No aliens, no government conspiracies, but that's okay! Smith comes across as charming and good natured in his role as the 'Date Doctor', as does Kevin James, in an inspired comic turn from the actor (in many ways, he actually manages to steal the show).

Having said that, Hitch does sag in places, notably the too-drawn-out repartee between Smith and Eva Mendes. However, the comic moments DO make up for this. It's a chick flick in the sense that it follows that basic formula with which we've become so familiar, but it's got comedy too, and it's even got the odd tense moment. Hitch is well worth seeing if you're in the mood for something light, fun, and ultimately optimistic and hopeful, this might well be your film.

Well done Will, this is one of the few rom-coms that didn't make me cringe (too much).