yunafires Reviews

She-Hulk: Attorney at Law: Ribbit and Rip It (2022) Season 1, Episode 8

Jen is dreadfully dull on her own

[8/10 · 10 October 2022]

Jen is a narcissistic alcoholic, with the mentality of a zoomer discovering tumblr. Pairing her with Daredevil - whom I didn't know before this episode - proved she cannot carry this series on her own.

The two had some excellent back-and-fourth banter both in the courtroom and out, and even later during the warehouse bit. The two worked well together as a reverse Batman and Catwoman dynamic (he's the fast and agile one, while she's all strength & bulk).

Daredevil also had a more mature, dry sense of humor; a very 'I've been doing this for years' stoicism that contrasted well with Jen's entitled attitude.

As ever, all good feelings dissipate immediately following Daredevil's departure, as Jen literally seizes control of the audience's attention by yet another cringey 4th wall breaking one-sided conversation. These haven't ever worked in this show.

It totally killed the pacing and all but spelled out Something Bad Will Happen At The Gala. The awards ceremony itself was cringe to the max. It was like a mix of the Oscars and Miss America Pagent; completely detached from reality. We haven't known these characters long enough to remember their names let alone start showering them with awards and praise.

Regardless, I'm looking forward to the finale purely for more of the Emil Blonsky.

She-Hulk: Attorney at Law: Is This Not Real Magic? (2022) Season 1, Episode 4

4th Wall Breaks Are Cringe

[5/10 · 12 September 2022]

"You look happy" says Jen after a scene with Wong listening to The Sopranos opening theme song. Smiles instantly gone.

I don't care if it was part of the comic character. 4th wall breaking is a delicate thing. A throwaway line here or there is one thing - ie, Deadpool commenting on X-Men films' timelines - but Jen has more lines with an invisible audience than she does with literally anyone else.

For instance, she goes on a series of dates, all of which are a parade of Bad Men Stereotypes, with Jen staring mutely at them in her awful dead-eyed CGI. The last one actually asks about her personality - the only one with a discernible jawline and facial hair - and do we get a response from Jen? An insight into her personality?

Nope. She immediately whisks him away home because that simple question got her all hot and bothered. And just when we think 'oh look, we'll get a positive male character in this show that wasn't previously established like Wong'... nope! Guess again! Dude bails the morning after when he sees Jen as... Jen, and not She-Hulk.

The only positive thing about this episode was Wong, the Sopranos theme song, and Madisynn, in that precise order.

Madisynn was an unexpected highlight, and the first time the comedy in this show struck the right chord. In five seconds this character had a more interesting story, better personality, and more watchability than Jen herself. Madisynn is a character who isn't preaching to the audience, monologuing to them, or twerking with no-name "celebrities". She's simply a girl out to have fun, be it social drinking or wearing a comfortable plush onesie. She's fun in all the ways Jen only wishes she could be.

The rest of this episode was just the same old, same old. Oh look, She-Hulk is showing off her bare feet again, now stepping on a slimy demon bat. I swear there's a contract somewhere that stipulates She-Hulk has to be barefoot in every episode. It's getting beyond gratuitous at this point.

Elementary: The Worms Crawl in, the Worms Crawl Out (2018) Season 6, Episode 17

A sloppy mess

[3/10 · 12 August 2022]

This episode was like a compilation of mini-cases, four at least, that come across as badly-formed ideas slapped together haphazardly.

By the final act I felt like I was watching the Word Salad episode from "Boston Legal". Everything required a tedious exposition. From heat and melting paint, to worm species & appetites, to spaceship online strategy game, to bullet proof hoodies made of spider webs!

To ay nothing of the B plot where Sherlock's medical data is stolen, somehow used by an Irish man for paperwork forgery, and that all connects to a nemesis of Sherlock that I don't even remember.

Literally half the plots could've be snipped away and it would've been so much better.

Resurrection (2022)

Tim Roth is the sole reason to watch this dreck

[2/10 · 9 August 2022]

This movie sorely needed a better editor. Lengthy, plodding scenes don't add any tension, they simply become background noise as I scroll thru reddit on my phone.

There's no story here. Hysterical woman acts like she drank some spiked tea while everyone else around her appears confused.

'Secret Window' played this trope far better, had a more interesting 'twist', and most importantly, knew when to amp up the tension. It also had a more interesting lead, which this movie lacks.

By the time the reason I watched this film shows up - aka Tim Roth - I was just about to set the movie at a higher speed.

The years might've added a few more wrinkles, lessened his energy, but he's the same British bulldog I fell in love with back when I first saw him in The Incredible Hulk & Lie to Me. However, even he appears confused and lost as his co-star hams it up and chews scenery like the worst kind of amateur.

The movie doesn't even provide a satisfactory ending (which, as a reminder from Secret Window, *is the most important part of the story*). While it tries to play up the 'just a dream' trope, it never gives enough on either side to be worthwhile.

Was she crazy, was she not... I don't know. And I don't bloody care. What an odd waste of a movie.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Sightless in a Savage Land (2021) Season 22, Episode 4

An incoherent mess. Barba deserves better.

[5/10 · 20 April 2022]

I watched this only for Raul Esparza as Rafael Barba, having last seen him in S19. While his scenes with Carisi still sizzled with wonderful tension, the rest of this episode was a disaster.

Even from the opening scenes of characters I've no clue about (one of the cops is a lesbian, as L&O realize representation matters, Ice-T has a love interest because... yay? Noah is now much older, etc etc) there's something very off in everyone's performances. They all seem, well, dead behind the eyes. So very Over It, there only to recite lines and move on to the next scene.

Apart from everyone sounding like dead autumn leaves on an cracked sidewalk, the writing is godawful. We bounce around scene to scene, barely latching on to a character before we're whisked away to another. Conveniently, Ice-T gets a phone call that conveniently allows the clearly traumatized war veteran and father to shoot the accused man. The setup could be seen from a mile away.

The court case proceeds as if the murdered man was an established rapist with a long history of grooming girls in his care. And yet in a scene just some minutes prior, Benson clearly states there hadn't been any complaints against him.

Whatever. The court scenes are all too brief and we don't even get to see the verdict, only a dismissive mention of it. If the characters don't care, then why should we?

5 stars for Barba & Carisi.

If you want a far better show, watch Boston Legal.

The Office: Training Day (2011) Season 7, Episode 19

"Enough about your baby, okay?"

[5/10 · 26 November 2021]

Will Ferrell as the new manager had me at that line. Putting Pam/Jim in their place. Literally no one cares about the damn baby!

Whether Ferrell "fits" The Office, well, obviously not since he's only in a few episodes. Which is tragic. It was great seeing the rest of the office react to the new boss, how they tried buttering him up.

Michael is at his most Michael-y here. Oblivious to the consequences of his actions until it's happening, then throwing a tantrum when all the attention isn't on him. It'll be sad to see him go but I'm looking forward to seeing the show without him.

That said? Michael's - no, Steve's - backwards hug with Ferrell was extremely touching and I actually teared up. You could see the friendship between the two actors in that odd moment.

The Office: Viewing Party (2010) Season 7, Episode 8

Doesn't focus enough on 'Glee'

[6/10 · 25 November 2021]

I love the concept that, in The Office universe, Glee exists. And even that Michael's favorite character is Artie, played by Kevin McHale, who was the pizza delivery boy in S4. Great connection there.

What stops the episode dead in its tracks, as with every episode, is Pam's baby drama. I don't watch a show called 'The Office' to hear babies crying. That is, in fact, the very last thing I'd want to hear on any show.

Pam and Jim were cute in the first three seasons. Now they're simply tedious co-dependents with no character. They exist as each other's halves and are no longer independent entities. It's beyond gross.

Dwight is, as ever, the highlight of the episode. Not just because he finally shuts the damn baby up, but I thoroughly enjoy his contractual relationship with Angela. Imo, Dwight comes across as someone with asperger's or high-functioning autism. Emotions like love are difficult for him. I can 100% believe his relationship being one of pure logic... at least, in his mind.

I enjoyed Andy's screw-up just as much as I enjoyed Dwight manipulating Jim. That said, I don't understand Andy's simping for Erin. The storyline is like an attempt at recreating Jim-Pam except, sad to say it, but Erin is a limp noodle by comparison. I don't see how someone as charismatic and immensely talented as Andy would fall for her.

Anyway, this was an odd episode overall. It was like a half-assed ad for Glee which, as of this episode's airing, was barely through its first season. S7 is definitely running on fumes.

Lie to Me: Funhouse (2011) Season 3, Episode 9

The entire reason for S3 to exist

[10/10 · 3 November 2021]

This episode, right here. Granted, the use of hallucinogens or drugs in general is an overused trope to reveal more about the leading man, but Tim Roth is so exceptional that it totally works.

We already knew since S1 what happened to his mum. And, thanks to S3's at times awful writing, we cannot possibly forget that his mum, well, offed herself. But here we actually get to see Cal interact with her and see, very briefly, his fears laid bare.

He's stripped of his usual narcissism and cocky swagger, and we see a man getting older, just some years shy of 50. We learn a bit more about his parents and what shaped him to be the father that he is to Emily.

Everyone holds their own against his lunacy and gets their time to shine, even the tragically underused Loker. But its the scenes in the mental hospital that shine brightest, along with a cast clearly having fun.

Whilst I've many problems with S3 overall, this episode and Veronica reach S1 levels of greatness and are entirely the sole reasons to watch the season.

Boychoir (2014)

A waste of good talent (McHale, Izzard, Bates) in a ho-hum predictable film

[4/10 · 24 October 2021]

Kevin McHale, Eddie Izzard, and even Kathy Bates are all average-to-amazing singers, yet here that talent goes to waste as they are each stuck in roles they could probably sleepwalk through.

The plot is so predictable that I skipped through most of it and still got the important plot beats: Stet is Talented Yet Troubled, stuck with problematic/alcoholic mom, until tragedy happens, then he's sent to live with his absentee father. The father doesn't want his 'new' family to know about Stet, so he ships him off to a boarding school, literally buying his way in.

Shenanigans happen. All the tropes you expect are here. The snobby "popular" kids who bully the new guy, the young hopeful teacher (Wooly, played by Kevin McHale, practically copying off Matthew Morrison's Mr. Schue on Glee) who believes in Stet's talent, the opposing teacher (played by the ever reliable Eddie Izzard) who backs the popular bully, and the headmistress, played with matronly cheerfulness and sass by Kathy Bates.

And of course there's Dustin Hoffman, the "big star" to draw in the crowds, but this is a role he's done better in Finding Neverland, among countless others. Tragically he's the only one given any backstory or reason to exist, and its as barebones as one can get.

The writing and editing in this film are atrocious. Most all the characters are cardboard cutouts, indistinguishable from one another. Out of everyone, I had the biggest hopes for Kevin McHale, who filmed this on days off from Glee's final season. While he has the acting - and singing! - chops to go against the household names he's sharing the screen with, he's given virtually nothing to do besides look amazing in cozy sweaters.

TL;DR: Predictable film, awkward title, probably best left to the bargain bin or, at worst, lost to time.

The House Next Door: Meet the Blacks 2 (I) (2021)

Trashy, dull, and Danny Trejo criminally underused

[3/10 · 2 October 2021]

Honestly watched this just for Trejo. At first the rest of the cast was charming but their obvious improv went on for far too long and just became tedious to watch. Skipped through most of it but from what I saw it seems like this was a "retelling" or mash-up of Fright Night and Underworld 3. Yawn.

Penny Dreadful: Possession (2014) Season 1, Episode 7

Eva Green Wrecks the Show

[1/10 · 21 November 2020]

All respect to her as a person, of course, and I doubt this nothing review will ever be read by anyone who cares. But I personally cannot stand Ms Ives and her demon possession storyline.

There are far more interesting things going on with Frankenstein, with Irish Rose Tyler, hell even Chandler. This episode and the last just drag everything down completely.

The New Mutants (2020)

It'd work amazing as a pilot for a series. On its own? Its... okay.

[7/10 · 10 November 2020]

It really reminded me of Alphas by the end, specifically the first two episodes of that series. The film tells the story it wants to tell, but once that's over, now what? There's a positive, uplifting feeling at the end. The group did not entirely get the therapy they needed, but together, they can conquer their inner demons.

It's a nice message of togetherness, but sadly, the group are each given just enough backstory (comprised of their worst memories/fears) and that's mostly it, with little else. The women of the group fare better than the men, in terms of development, but that's both a praise and a complaint. I wish the group had been given equal amounts of personality development. But suffice to say: the one you expect to be the standout character absolutely *is* that standout character. But she is No One.

The other reviews that mention fluctuating accents and plot holes... Well, to be fair, I noticed some of that here and there (for instance, why is the rich kid the only one shown doing manual labor?) but not enough to bother me.

Still, its a breezy 94 minutes. Time you won't regret, you'll possibly want more by the end, and that's fair praise for any movie.

The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

Napoli is the best character

[5/10 · 8 July 2020]

Watched this for Michael McMillian, and for him alone. I wasn't disappointed with his performance. Best of all, he got all bloodied and looked adorable doing it! The rest is all the worst horror movie tropes imaginable. Check the Goofs to see how terrible & poorly researched this movie is.

Westworld: Crisis Theory (2020) Season 3, Episode 8

Completely incomprehensible mess

[1/10 · 29 June 2020]

Barely 40 minutes into the finale and I've completely lost the plot. Maeve had no character motivation until her boyfriend died and suddenly grrr must kill Dolores. Aaron Paul was just the confused human until he found he killed his friend (who was... Going to kill him anyway) now suddenly he's the leader of a revolution. Literally what the hell is happening anymore?

Humans discover their digital devices know who they are and predict their outcome. Ok and? We have that already. But in that world having that info makes everyone into primal cave people within minutes. Sure...

The only standout this season, like last one predictably, has been James Delos acting as a therapist for William and all his incarnations. That was a damn good scene, well acted by all involved. And now William is a host, rendering all character progression completely pointless.

If every character on this show is a simulation (Lee! Great to have you and your delightful accent back albeit briefly) or a host then literally what the hell is the point of watching anymore?

Leprechaun 6: Back 2 Tha Hood (2003 Video)

Couldn't even entertain a drunk. Title character featured far too little

[3/10 · 14 July 2019]

Warwick Davis is the star of this franchise. His comedic timing is the sole reason we return. Whoever made this clearly didn't realize this, as thry think we'd rather watch some "hood" drama school dropouts pathetically attempt to act.

They fail. As does the writing, terrible fight scene choreography, and so much else.

There are some highlights, all involving the Leprechaun, naturally. His attempts to drive a police car, for instance, or when he tries to impress a lady on the phone with his... Erm, attributes.

But really. I'm three sheets to the wind, looking for a comedy for that final margarita glass, and this fails on nearly every account. Tragic.