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The High Fructose Adventures of Annoying Orange (2012)
What the F***? Seriously? This is HORRIBLE.
I don't really even know what to say about this show. It is one of the worst shows I have ever seen, joining an elite club that also includes Nickelodeon's "Marvin, Marvin".
Usually, when there's a show like this that many people consider bad, I watch it just to see for myself and then I go from there. Not only could I not make it through the episode, not only could I not make it through ten minutes, not only could I not make it through five minutes, I couldn't even get through THREE minutes. THREE MINUTES. That's how long it took for me before I finally got the urge to shoot myself.
It just isn't funny! I get it's supposed to be for kids and all of that s***, but I'm sure that five-year-old kids wouldn't find it funny, either.
Let's see... I would rather get a colonoscopy from Wolverine than watch this show. I would rather be Billy Gardell's towel (Mike & Molly) after he got done working out for three hours than watch this. I would rather eat a tub of one-year expired mayonnaise than watch "Annoying Orange". I would rather light my crotch on fire than watch that show. I would rather listen to "Gangnam Style" for a full day straight than watch this show. I would rather be robbed at gun point than watch this show. I would rather drink horse semen than watch this show. I would rather break every bone in my body than watch this crappy show. I would rather have a threesome with Rosie O'Donnell and Kirstie Alley than watch this show. I would rather watch a movie with Bobcat Goldthwait, Pauly Shore, Jennifer Tilly, French Stewart, Ray Romano, Gilbert Gottfried, Fran Drescher, Chris Tucker and Dick Vitale than watch this steaming pile. I would rather get a tramp stamp that says "Insert Here" with an arrow pointing down (and I'm a straight man) than watch this show. I would rather get a paper-cut on my sun-burnt nipple than watch this show. I would rather get a prostate exam from The Hulk and The Thing than watch this show. I would rather give a 700-pound woman a bikini wax than watch this show. I would rather eat pig's testicles than watch the "Annoying Orange".
Do you get the picture? There are many, many, many embarrassing and disgusting things that I would rather do on this Earth than watch this f****** show. It was AWFUL.
I don't know how a show like Scooby Doo! Mystery Incorporated went away, but this horrendous Annoying Orange series stayed on. The Scooby Doo show was much weirder than all of the others over the years, but it was still myriads better than this dribble. Cartoon Network executives must be letting their five-year-old kids run the network instead of doing everything themselves. (BTW, SD!MI has a 7.6 rating on IMDb, while Annoying Orange has a 3.0, if that says anything; I also like Johnny Test, which gets tons of negative reviews, so for me to say this about Annoying Orange, the latter must be bad).
I can't believe this show is on the air. It's absolutely mind-boggling. I really have no idea what these people are thinking. It's not funny. It's stupid and the people that watch this on a daily basis are stupid. I really have nothing else to say, except for never watch this show. EVER. Do yourself a favor and watch something else, ANYTHING ELSE. Chances are, it's better than this poor excuse of a show. The creators of this must have been on a ten-day cocaine binge when they came up with this. That's the only reason I can think of, but just do anything else than watch this. It would be the best decision in your life, no doubt about it.
Marvin Marvin (2012)
One of the Worst Shows I've Ever Seen
Typically, with shows like this, I'll watch an episode to gage how good (or bad) it is. Yeah, I couldn't make it through an episode.. Hell, I couldn't even make it through five minutes before trying to run away from this poor excuse of a show. It is AWFUL. Absolutely AWFUL.
The actors should be ashamed to even affiliate themselves with this.
The episode that I just saw had to do with some Earth Day stuff and the main character (Marvin) was preparing for this before learning that his Uncle Steve was coming to visit. And who played his uncle? French Stewart. Yeah, the guy from 3rd Rock From the Sun. He must be DESPERATELY seeking work to affiliate himself with this "show". That, or/and he's blown all of his money savings and will do anything to get some money. That's the only reason I can think of for French Stewart to appear in a show like this. In all honesty, I feel sorry for him. I would hate to be him right now, as I'm sure most people would after seeing that episode because frankly, I wanted to gouge my eyes out. It was horrific and is honestly one of the worst TV shows I have ever seen in my 23 years of existence.
And I also feel sorry for Casey Sander, who plays Bernadette's father on the Big Bang Theory (one of my favorite shows). According to IMDb, he's been in a dozen episodes in this franchise and he must be in the same boat as French Stewart. I would rather be the janitor at Wal-Mart or at a Special Kids Camp than be a part of "Marvin, Marvin".
The kid who plays Marvin, Lucas Cruitylaodfjkdfashnk or whatever the f*** his name is, is a HORRIBLE actor. He just can't do it. And that's the worst part of the show. None of the people on the show can act. The aforementioned French Stewart and Casey Sander can (I've seen them in other stuff), so I know they're not the problem. The others are. The dude that plays Marvin must bring everyone down with him -- that, and the scripts are downright horrendous.
The only reason that this show would be even somewhat enjoyable to watch is that the mom is kinda hot. That's about it. Other than that, I don't know what redeeming qualities people see in this. Nickelodeon has gone downhill, BAD. When I was a kid, I had All That, Hey Arnold!, Rocko's Modern Life, Doug, Rocket Power, Rugrats, Angry Beavers and many other great and enjoyable shows. But now, it appears that this network has just gone down the crapper and it has to do with shows like "Marvin, Marvin" and that Fred show, which Lucas Cruikshank also starred in apparently (didn't know that, but I assume it was horrible too).
If I could give this show a negative rating, I would. But unfortunately, I can't and that sucks. Do yourself a favor and go rent some of the worst movies of all-time like Gigli, Movie 43, The Garbage Pail Kids Movie, Bio-Dome, Catwoman, Jack and Jill, Superbabies, or Battlefield Earth because chances are, they're 100x better than this crap.
Impractical Jokers (2011)
Impractical Jokers: Undoubtedly the Best Show Currently on TruTV
I just started watching this show, and I'll share a little tidbit of how I began to watch Impractical Jokers. When I was watching TruTV, advertisements kept on coming up for this show, and I thought that it looked completely stupid and idiotic. So, one night, I turned it on to see how stupid it was and low and behold, I actually began to like it. I hadn't even watched it for two minutes before I began to chuckle and it stayed that way for the duration of the show. Impractical Jokers is absolutely hilarious! What makes it even more funny is that it seems to be legitimate. With TruTV's programming, most, if not all, of it is fake. Shows like Operation Repo, Hardcore Pawn, Storage Hunters, Lizard Lick Towing, South Beach Tow, etc. all seem to be scripted. Impractical Jokers doesn't have that feel to it, as everything seems genuine -- the pranks, the laughs between the four guys, and everything else. That's what is perhaps the best thing about the show because it's on a channel that airs predominantly scripted shows. Many people seem to think that Impractical Jokers is a reality TV show, but that's definitely not the case. As I said earlier, I thought the show was idiotic at first, but then I began to watch more and more and I have now seen nearly every single episode of theirs.
Another thing that is great about the show is that all four of the guys -- Joe, Murr, Q and Sal -- are very likable. Joe is the guy that never appears to be scared -- on certain pranks that have the three others tell Joe what to say, Joe says it nearly every single time, no matter how embarrassing, awkward, mean or crude it is. Sal, who is perhaps my favorite on the show, seems to be a very genuine guy who doesn't want to make anyone mad and most of the time, loses when the three tell him what to say. Murray, or "Murr" for short, is the part of the group that everyone jokes with -- i.e. calling him names, making fun of his looks, getting him to the more embarrassing things, etc. If it weren't for Murr, this show would be a lot less funny. Q... I really don't know about him (haha). He rarely loses and like Joe, is rarely scared.
DEFINITELY check out this show if you haven't already. Impractical Jokers isn't a show like Jackass, as they primarily had very crude stuff on their show. IJ has primarily fun pranks that is sure to get the people around them to laugh hysterically. It's definitely a barrel of laughs and shows a great amount of camaraderie between the four pranksters.
I would love to see Impractical Jokers come out on DVD in the future because there's no question that I would buy the first season or two as soon as it hits the shelves. There's also no doubt in my mind that this is unquestionably the best show on TruTV's network right now. When perusing through the user reviews, completely disregard the negative comments toward this show -- I was once one of those guys, but I'm definitely not like that now. This show is hilarious, check it out!
Be sure to look out for new episodes of Impractical Jokers -- they come on Thursday night. You won't regret it!
Here Comes Honey Boo Boo (2012)
'Here Comes Honey Boo Boo' is an embarrassment to the people of the South
I can't believe this is actually a show. It honestly makes 'Jersey Shore' look like 'The Brady Bunch' and 'Keeping up with the Kardashians' look like 'All in the Family'. This is is absolutely horrible and a disgrace to the people who live in the South.
Apparently, this show takes place near Atlanta, Georgia, which isn't that bad of a place either. I'm a southerner and these people give us a bad name. I turned this on and subsequently watched three episodes with my mouth nearly wide open.
I could not believe that TLC actually turned this into a show -- TLC, after all, has some solid programming -- My Strange Addiction, Cake Boss, Four Wedding, 19 Kids & Counting, Extreme Couponing, Say Yes to the Dress and multiple others -- I do not watch most of those shows but have heard good things from females. Unfortunately, 'Here Comes Honey Boo Boo' scrapes the bottom of the barrel.
This show follows the story of Alana, affectionately known as "Honey Boo Boo" in Georgia, along with her parents, three sisters and their pet pig, "Glitzy". Alana participates in pageants and this show is mainly filmed during the pageant's "offseason". Numerous things go on throughout the show, which is something people don't really care about. Like myself, I'm sure they care about the following aspects...
* Having captions for their words: First off, you know it's bad when a TV station has to give the people subtitles for their words and sentences. I can understand having it for a young girl like "Honey Boo Boo", but not for her 32-year-old mom and 40-year-old father, also known as "Sugar Bear". That's just horrible and people are mainly going to attribute that to the South, which isn't a good thing by any means. Not all people here in the South are like that, but they sure don't help our cause either.
* The girls have different dads: In one of three episodes I watched (IU can't remember which one), the mom (June) was randomly explaining the dynamics of her family -- to which she said Alana is the daughter of her and Sugar Bear's (her current boyfriend of eight years). She would then go on to say that her other three daughters had different dads, although she didn't state how many different dads there were. June just said that none of THEM were in the picture, which is definitely at least two different dads. If that's not the case, then all four daughters have different dads, which is downright horrible and should be on 'Maury' instead. Come on. I wouldn't even share that on television if I was in her shoes -- that makes her look like a tramp, straight up.
* The random picture of Dale Earnhardt: I'll be the first to tell you that I'm a humongous NASCAR fan and have been for the majority of my life (check out fourturns.blogspot.com). NASCAR is one of my favorite sports, along with the NFL and the NBA. And seeing that picture of Dale Earnhardt makes me automatically assume that these people are NASCAR and Earnhardt fans, which probably isn't a good thing. NASCAR is mainly categorized as a "redneck sport" and it will stay that way for the foreseeable future. It sucks to be thought of as a redneck just because you love the sport. And these people do not help that situation. They are rednecks (and often refer to themselves as that), but not all NASCAR fans are that way -- like me and my father. That just makes us fans look tremendously bad.
* Their "code words": I really don't know how else to explain it, so I'm just going to go with code words. Throughout the entire show, you'd notice that they have many different words for many different things. Two of the most prominent and used words on their show is "too-tay" and "biscuit", which refers to a woman's downstairs area (I would just say the p---- word, but that would probably be very offensive). Regardless, that's just stupid. I can understand using a word like "butt" instead of "ass", especially when you're trying to refrain from using that word around young children. But come on. Seriously? I have never, ever heard anybody say those words -- at least when it comes to referring to down there. It's just stupid.
* Crockett's Cafeteria: Seriously? I understand that the town is just around 700 people but come on. In one of the episodes, the mom and Sugar Bear went out to Crockett's Cafeteria for their eight-year anniversary. Yes, I have never been to Crockett's, nor have ever heard of it, but it looked despicable. At least go to Wendy's, Back Yard Burger or Arby's if there's one there. I'm sure that there is a restaurant in their town that is better than that. I can understand if they don't have much money, but they have to be making a decent chunk of change if their being filmed by TLC. They could have done much better.
I could honestly go on and on and on about this show, but I'm going to just stop here. I think this is enough points. The ONLY reason I'm giving it a 2/10 is because it's somewhat entertaining, even though it's an embarrassment to the people in the South. Other than that, I just don't like the show. TLC should be doing a lot better than following these "rednecks" around. Come on, son.
Green Lantern (2011)
I don't see what all the hate is about.. I enjoyed this movie.
Going through the reviews for this movie, there are so many reviews that are lower than 5. I don't get it, I just don't.
Yes, Ryan Reynolds may not have been the best actor for the role of "Green Lantern", but I thought he did a phenomenal job. He did very well portraying Hal Jordan/Green Lantern.
However, I think this movie got such bad reviews because it was released after "Thor" and "X-Men First Class". Not to mention, "Iron Man 2" came out in 2010 and did amazing in the box office. I firmly believe that if Green Lantern had come out before those three movies, it would have done much better. But because that trio set such a high bar for "Green Lantern", it didn't live up to everyone's expectations and seemingly flopped. I, however, enjoyed it a lot. I thought it was great.
There were a few problems I had with the movie, however.
I understand that movies have to give a back-story. I'm fine with that. It's happened in "Thor", "Captain America", "Spiderman", "Iron Man" and countless others. That's all fine and good but it seemed like this movie took longer than all of the other ones.
The main qualm I had with the whole back-story thing was Hector Hammond's character, which was played by Peter Sarsgaard. Hammond, while doing the autopsy on Abin Sur's body, was seemingly bitten/stung by something, which infected him with the alien lifeform (Parallax). Soon, Hammond was given telepathic and telekinetic powers and his head grew very, very big and he had to eventually be bound in a wheelchair. Regardless, it seemed like Hammond had more screen-time as the "regular guy" than as the "super-villain". During a face-off with the Green Lantern, Jordan (Reynolds) gave Hammond the ring after he had threatened to kill Carol (Blake Lively). However, Hammond couldn't kill Jordan because you had to be chosen to wear the ring. Almost immediately after, Parallax swarmed into the building and killed Hammond. That was the last we ever heard of him for the rest of the movie. To me, he just didn't have much time as the super villain. Most of it was attributed to the back-story and like I said, I get that. But, I would have much rather seen him battle Jordan more as a super villain. It seemed as though they battled for no more than 7-8 minutes throughout the entire thing.
I also wish they would have focused more on Jordan's training to become a Green Lantern. His sessions with Kilowog didn't last that long and it would have been nice to see exactly what he needed to do and how he fared. Of course, he was able to defeat Parallax at the end of the movie with not much training, apparently. He really didn't need that much however, as "The bigger you are, the quicker you burn" was somewhat easy.
Additionally, I would have liked to see Jordan and Parallax fight more. They had that big fight scene at the end of the movie, which lasted about ten minutes (if even that much).
But like I said, the movie would have likely been better for two reasons: A) it came out before "Iron Man 2", "Thor" and "X-Men First Class" and B) if they didn't have to do the back-story. The back-story took up a lot of the movie, meaning that a lot of potential action scenes were never going to appear. Much of the back-story just wasn't that entertaining, i.e. Jordan's nephew's birthday party, the scene with testing the airplanes, etc.
Even though it had a few flaws (much like nearly every single film), I enjoyed it. Like I said, I thought Ryan Reynolds did a great job. I love superhero movies and have seen the majority of them and "Green Lantern" is one of my favorites -- along with both Iron Man films, the Batman trilogy, "The Avengers" and "Thor". I thought it was a great movie and because of that, I went out and bought it on DVD. It's definitely not as bad as people are saying.
Your Highness (2011)
This movie is downright hilarious; don't know why there's so much negativity
This is my first review on here and I had to participate in this after seeing all of the negative reviews.
I don't see how all these other people are bashing this movie. This movie is absolutely hilarious and makes me laugh throughout the entire movie. Danny McBride, one of my favorite actors, is hilarious just like he was in Eastbound & Down.
Apparently most of the people that have seen this movie have no sense of humor, because it's funny as hell. It's one of the few movies that I laugh from beginning to end. And not to mention, Natalie Portman is in the movie -- and she's hot! James Franco isn't the funniest guy in the world, but I like him in this movie. This was one of my favorite movies of 2011 and it is undoubtedly better than Pineapple Express.
This movie is great. It follows two brothers, who are both princes -- Franco plays Prince Fabious and McBride portrays Prince Thadeous. After coming back from a quest, Fabious brings a girl named Belladona (Zooey Deschanel), who has been a prisoner in their enemy's castle -- Played by Justin Theroux, the villain is a wizard named Leezar, who will have sex with a virgin (Deschanel) to make a dragon that will terrorize the land. At their wedding, Leezar appears, uses magic and takes Belladonna back. Thadeous was supposed to be Fabious' best man but after hearing two of the "Knights Elite" talk smack, he decided to skip the wedding and smoke pot. When he and Courtney (his "young squire") come back, Fabious is crying and thought something had happened to his brothers. Their dad announces that Fabious is going back on another quest to defeat Leezar and bring his fiancée back. Thadeous was happy that his brother was going, but his dad would go on to say that Thadeous could go on his first quest or he could stay and receive a judgement from the people of their "city". Thadeous then goes and the rest they say, is history.
After falling asleep, Thadeous is woken up by "Julie", Fabious' right-hand man and confidant. Thadeous does not want to go in to see the "Wize Wizard", and Boremont (one of the Knights Elite) says that he would go and leave Thadeous there. Fabious says no and one he says that, you can tell that Boremont is not too pleased and something shady would eventually happen. When seeing the Wizard, he tells them why Leezar needs Belladonna and they need to find the "Blade of Unicorn". In order to get the sword, he gives them a one-of-a-kind compass that only works in sunlight. Before they leave, the brothers are forced to do a sexual favor for the Wizard -- it is then safely assumed that Fabious was molested by him when he was younger.
After Fabious and the Knight Elite trick Thadeous into eating something very gross, he storms off. His servant Courtney is standing by a tree, peeing in the grass. He looks over and sees Julie do some type of magic and talk to Leezar. Leezar tells Julie to capture Fabious and kill Thadeous and Courtney, as they serve no purpose to him. Courtney tells the brothers what's happening and after Courtney captures him, they bring him back to the main camp-site. There, it is announced that Julie isn't the only one on Leezar's side -- Boremont, the other two Knights Elite and two random Japanese(?) warriors are, as well. However, Fabious, Thadeous and Courtney are able to escape thanks to Fabious.
Along the way, theay are captured by nymphs, who are led by the evil Marteetee. After Fabious defeats their best warrior, Marteetee has people bring out his cauldron, which somehow made a hydra-like monster-like bulbis (or something of that nature). Fabious gets bit by the monster and Courtney is forced to suck it out in order to save him. After one of the heads is cut off, Marteetee brings it back out and an unknown person is able to cut off the other three heads -- when a head is cut off, Marteetee loses whichever finger it was. After he loses every finger but his middle one, it is revealed that this unknown person is Isabel (Natalie Portman). She soon announces that Marteetee enslaved her father and killed him in the arena. Isabel would then go on to say that she came there for two reasons: 1) to kill the beast and 2) killing him. She is able to somehow throw her "sword" (or whatever it was) up there, stabbing Marteetee in the chest. Marteetee then collapses in the cauldron and the four are able to escape. Soon afterward, they decide to travel together, as they are all headed in the same direction.
I'm not going to say much else, as I don't want to give too much away.
I just can't see how this movie gets such bad reviews, as well as Hot Rod, MacGruber and Cedar Rapids. But apparently I have a different sense of humor than most people, I guess. If you haven't seen this movie, go rent it right now. It's a great movie and provides a great amount of laughs. It's definitely worth the rental, so check it out.