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Reviews
Pinocchio (1940)
HEADS UP! THIS IS THE BEST DISNEY MOVIE EVER!!!
I love it so much but I really do think it cringe to watch movie but I will watch it when I get older and out of cringe mode but I really do love the story and the song when u wish upon a star. Pinocchio the character is cool and funny cuz he doesn't know much stuff so he definitely needs to JUST GO TO STINKIN SCHOOL! And plus u kinda can't get a job when ur a kid and every kid's job is to GO TO SCHOOL. This why I love the entire thing:)
Self Quarantined (2022)
A milestone of modern sci-fi filmmaking
How can one comment sufficiently on a milestone?
The first watch of "Self Quarantined" is like pure shock, because (at least for me anyway) you can't believe that such a film now exists.
The directions it goes are unpredictable, especially with Michelle Lamb's character, and the VFX are very original as well.
The "Self Quarantined" crew definitely have a unique gem on their hands, and film festivals audiences are going to love it.
I Got the Hook Up (1998)
I love this movie. And no, I'm not Master P's cousin.
I've seen more than my share of bad movies. I've seen my share, your share, probably your dad's share too. And the lady who delivers your mail Monday through Friday, the one who sometimes waves to you when you're out waiting for your dog to take a shizer, I've definitely seen her share. I went to see Master P's "I Got The Hook Up" in 1998 after reading a review in the arts section of the local newspaper, a review not unlike the negative ones here on IMDb. It declared "Hook Up" to be the absolute worst film the critic had ever seen, and set about quoting some of the supposedly awful lines from the movie. It was upon reading these quotes that I decided I had to go see this flick immediately. If you laughed at "Friday", there's absolutely no reason you won't laugh at "I Got The Hook Up". It's cut from the same cloth and features a few of the same key cast members as well. The cinematography and overall look of the film are surprisingly impressive as well (the production value is actually better than "Friday"). But the greatest part of this film is the dialog and characters. At times, it almost feels like they cast hilarious people and just let them say whatever they wanted. The fact IMDb didn't have ANY "memorable quotes" listed for this movie tells me it is truly under-appreciated. I added several of my favorite lines in hopes that some of you guys might laugh and check out this film.
Viva (2007)
Anna Biller = Genius
Never before has a modern film so perfectly succeeded in capturing the look, style and feel of the 70's Sexploitation classics. Anna Biller's "Viva" is an explosion of color, humor and schlock done to the nines, besting attempts made by far bigger-budgeted flicks like "Austin Powers" and "Grindhouse" in truly recreating a bygone era. It's a true skin-comedy epic that delivers everything the gorgeous promotional art promises, and will no doubt become a cult classic among those with a true affinity for well-done homage. I watched this with some friends and there were times when we had to actually stop the DVD because we were laughing so hard! The prostitution and nudist camp scenes are simply unbelievable. Highly recommended.
13 Seconds (2003)
freakier than you'd expect
This is one of those movies that starts off simply enough, then just escalates and escalates until the very moment it ends, twisting every which way and meanwhile scaring the hell out of you, keeping you guessing the whole time. The premise may sound trite (rock band in a haunted house!), but believe me this movie isn't one of those flicks where people start dying one by one, and the killer is confronted at the end. No way. Instead, we're treated to one of the best, seriously scary shot-on-video features since THE DIVIDING HOUR, showcasing huge talent that has just begun to assault our nerves.
Writer/Director Jeff Thomas scores with not only a competently paced film and a well-constructed story, but also by assembling a very capable cast, an unusually good fx team, some of the best photography and lighting I've ever seen on an indie production, and a fleet-fingered editor that keeps the tension high by never letting our eyes rest for more than, well, 13 seconds, it would seem. If you like the atmosphere and themes of the original EVIL DEAD, you'll be delighted to see a lot of influence here, though not in obvious ways. Additionally, a lot of surreal and nightmarish qualities are present, taking cues from such varied sources as DORIAN GRAY, JACOB'S LADDER and even the first ELM STREET film.
This is much more than a haunted house movie: it's cerebral and terrifying all at once. Definitely a praise-worthy achievement in low-budget film-making.