DreamerX616 Reviews

Storage 24 (2012)

Lock It Up & Throw Away the Key !

[2/10 · 13 July 2020]

O dear Noel, just because you were in a handful of Doctor Who episodes doesn't mean you can now start writing your own sc-fi screen plays because this was scene after scene of derivative garbage.

There was barely an original note to this, no surprises right down to who was going to live and who was going to die as the end credits started to play.

And that ending came out of nowhere and made zero sense - I hope you weren't expecting to get a sequel out of this.

Just leave this movie to gather dust in a lock up and leave it to the Storage Hunters to find!!

Purple Rain (1984)

The Power of Purple

[8/10 · 11 July 2020]

Not so much a movie as an unashamed promotional vehicle for this album of the same name - doesn't mean this film isn't any less enjoyable

Watch Prince do what he does best for an hour and 40 minutes - he may not be the greatest actor but he sure does put on a performance

The film bleeds the 80's and is all the better for it - watch this time and time again !!

A Single Man (2009)

A Singularly English Gentleman

[9/10 · 8 July 2020]

What could have delved deep into melodramatic nonsense, Ford avoids the soap opera and instead discovers a classy sadness and longing in this heartbreaking final evening of George, a middle aged handsome Englishman working as a lecturer in 60's America attempting to recover from the death of his male lover.

Every scene is gorgeously shot and directed, every moment filled with sexual tension that is never truly fulfilled

Firth and Hoult's relationship is heartbreaking and full of anticipation that never reaches it's climax. While Moore plays the aging beauty, looking for love in all the wrong places to perfection, managing to sustain those moments of fragility and longing without hamming it up.

A must for any aficionado of gay cinema

Beautiful Thing (1996)

Make Your Own Kind of Music !

[8/10 · 8 July 2020]

By the time this was released I was already in my 20's but still this tale of teenage love and awakening desire between these two boys stirred something inside of me and now in my 40's it still breaks my heart and how misspent my youth was, afraid of what others would think of me.

Such bravery in the story telling, so frank and honest in it's portrayal of a same sex love at that time - I adore this movie how ever dated it may feel now. The message still remains - Make your own kind of music !!

Great casting, wonderful soundtrack and, for a change for a movie about gay love, a happy ending !!

The film will always remain in my heart of what could have been for me xxx

The Breakfast Club (1985)

Detention for Everyone !!

[10/10 · 11 June 2020]

So much love for this movie, when I first saw this when it came out back in the 80's this is what I thought American High School was like and wanted it so badly (detention included), now after watching this 100's of times I still love it and brings back so many happy memories

If a film could be a comfort food this would be the best !!

I won't hear anything bad said about this movie - END OF !!

The Thing (I) (2011)

Well It Was Some THING !!

[7/10 · 11 June 2020]

Enjoyable sci-fi movie in and of itself (hence the 7 star rating) however it just doesn't work for me as a sequel in the sense that, given this was made 20 odd years since the original 80's movie and was meant to predate it, it doesn't feel like it, there is no retro 80's feel to it. While most of this is probably down to the progress of film making in general, giving this movie a cleaner look but when it comes down to it all the actors and set design look too present day.

The final scenes as the end credits start flashing up was a nice nod to the original to link the two but too little too late I'm afraid. This movie could have had a go and tried doing something at least a little different and called itself something entirely different and just been it's own 'thing' but hey nostalgia and lack of imagination eh!!

Night Hunter (2018)

Flawed But Watchable

[7/10 · 24 May 2020]

Engrossing enough serial killer thriller but the poorly miscast Cavill as a supposedly 'weathered Lieutenant' clearly didn't ring true here. I mean every scene looked like he'd just left the gym and no amount of ruffling up his hair and letting his beard become all grizzly can take away the fact that the only weathering he'd been through was a walk in the rain without a coat on !!

Still there was plenty of fun to be had with Kingsley phoning in the morally ambiguous vigilante and Brendan Fletcher having the time of his life playing with multiple personalities.

The plot wasn't always coherent and there were more than a couple of scenes that just seemed to drop into all the characters laps so we could move the story along but all in all not that bad of an effort while we wait for another season of Mindhunter.

Psycho II (1983)

Hitchcock It's Not But......

[7/10 · 23 May 2020]

An 80's sequel to the classic Hitchcock original was never going to come close to the almost perfection of it's predecessor however Psycho II does have it's charms.

Managing to keep the atmosphere of the first and the unsettling nature of Bates and his splintered mind unfortunately the director goes for shock visual value when it comes to the violence rather than the subtle interpretation of Hitchcock, sometimes what's not seen is more horrific than what is.

The makers of this movie decide to add some extra layers to Norman's upbringing which feels a little crass and unnecessary but I can only guess they were only allowing the Psycho franchise to continue which it eventually did.

Still this sequel was entertaining enough for a Saturday afternoon viewing and wasn't disappointed when it all came to a close.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Recurring Nightmare!

[6/10 · 10 May 2020]

Oh look it's another remake of a horror classic and while I don't mind the movie business taking on cult classics per-se, you have to give your movie going public something more than what they've seen before.

Just because advances in cinematography have come a long way since the 80's and you can make scenes look that much more impressive is not a good enough reason to remake a movie.

But that's all you pretty much get here, a re-hashing of the same story with all the most memorable scenes visually updated - sure they add a few more friends into the mix to kill off but essentially it's the same movie, Freddy with his wise cracks, requisite jump scares and gallons of blood.

I'm not saying it was unwatchable (hence the 6 star rating) but we've seen it all before.

Mad Genius (2017)

Huh? Fake Reviews Surely?!

[3/10 · 10 May 2020]

Remember that 90's movie Hackers, remember how bad that was? Well you would think after over 20 years on the concept of young, drug fuelled, pretty looking digital geniuses wanting to change the world that it would have evolved by now but no.

Some trippy visuals, a Bond-esque villiain in training, faux science mumbo jumbo, teenage hormones and recreational drug taking is all this film really amounts to.

For all those handing out 10 star reviews here (movie marketing people) it screams of desperation and not believing in the product you've sent out into the world. We see through it, please stop !!

I give it a 3 cause I made it to the end and 2 of those stars are for me achieving that!!

Dark Light (2019)

Sparse but Effective

[6/10 · 17 April 2020]

This is no masterpiece I think we can all agree on that however this is an interesting take on an Alien abduction theme and I haven't seen many of this type of genre in movies for quite some time.

Usually I would say that the hour and half movie run time is my ideal but here I just needed a little bit more fleshing out of the characters to give them a little more depth that maybe a bit more screen time may have achieved

The over all atmosphere was suitably creepy, with some spine tingly sound effects going on.

The ending, as with so many other 'horror' movies these days, keeps things open for a sequel which to be honest I wouldn't mind as long as they were given a bit more money and perhaps stretched the back story of these monsters/aliens

Watchable

I Am Jonas (2018 TV Movie)

I Am (Left Wanting More)

[8/10 · 11 April 2020]

Hauntingly tragic story of young love and innocence broken.

Told from 2 time periods this sensitively told french movie tells of a night of tragedy that would forever leave a scar on our main protagonist Jonas. The director leaves it till the last few scenes for the viewer to put all the pieces together and then have us screaming for answers and resolutions that by the end credits we know are never going to come and we leave the movie, like all the characters, with a sense of hope, tinged with despair.

Mercy Black (2019)

Have Mercy On Us !!!

[4/10 · 10 April 2020]

I sometimes wonder if the indie horror genre will ever produce a good movie again and then Mercy Black came along and they still haven't !!

It's all so mediocre, bland and somewhat average. Elements underused could have made this movie worth watching, go with the true crime angle and have the sketchy boyfriend play a bigger part in fleshing out the Mercy Black mythology, would have been more interesting than this sub-standard nonsense.

Instead we see the same old standard horror movie tropes doled out, doors opening on their own, shadows caught in the corner of an eye, creepy noises luring the characters away to discover nothing there and tension building sequences that turn out to be bad dreams. It's all so blah !!

And then there's the needless reveal toward the end which amounts to not much but another reveal when the movie ends.

I don't want to give spoilers away for those of you unfortunate enough to want to try this out but beware, so many plot holes, so many shoddy directions in order to progress the storyline.

Once Upon a Time in London (2019)

No Happily Ever After

[4/10 · 8 April 2020]

There really isn't that much of a plot to discuss in this less than average UK gangster flick - a depressing onslaught of an eye for an eye violence that with each pummeling, bloody face carvings and gang on gang fist fighting becomes less and less impactful.

For a movie that lasts an hour and 50 minutes the editing was incoherent and choppy it makes you wonder what was left on the cutting room floor and in no doubt what made it to the screen should have gone there too!

A Quiet Place (2018)

It's Oh So Quiet !!

[8/10 · 3 April 2020]

Thoroughly enjoyed this sci-fi esque horror movie, they picked some pretty decent actors and set up an interesting premise and honestly it was one of those times where not knowing the full beginnings didn't matter so much to me (yeah I know it wasn't massively original).

But it's yet another movie that solidifies my notion that kids screw everything up. From the youngest kid who just had to have that toy, to the deaf daughter who could have put two and two together sooner and saved them all, right down to the middle child who was just a bit of a wet blanket.

Though the parents here aren't much smarter - who thinks having a baby in a world where you have to be deadly quiet would be a good idea. Ok 'mistakes' happen but this was unforgivable. I mean just the mother in labor would have drawn the monsters in let alone a teething, constantly crying baby.

Shades of the Alien franchise sneak in but all in all a fun little movie that has my favourite run time !!

Ideal Home (2018)

An Ideal Cliche

[5/10 · 2 April 2020]

Well at least it was only an hour and half of obvious, stereotypical nonsense!

I understand it takes all sorts to make the world turn but these 2 would never have lasted 10 days let alone 10 years. Paul would have left Erasmus and not looked back long ago.

But let's suspend our disbelief while Coogan plays a toned down culinary queen version of his Alan Partridge character he's most noted for and Rudd plays...... well I'm not too sure but he deserves better. A dysfunctional passive aggressive couple think they can take care of a child in serious need of a therapist.

And nothing happens throughout the movie at least nothing out of the ordinary in this cliche ridden, supposedly romantic comedy.

Oh I did laugh once, the scene where Coogan throws himself on the car taking Rudd away as he professes his undying love and the driver said "I hope he's not talking to me" Best line of the movie !!

Clash of the Titans (2010)

Hollywood Greeks

[6/10 · 1 April 2020]

I'm a sucker for the Greek mythology so despite a rough around the edges 'retelling' of the story of Perseus I though I'd take Clash of the Titans for another spin and it was exactly as I'd forgotten it....

Neeson & Fiennes are both wasted here, practically phoning their performances in, I mean come on nothing here is a stretch for them. Worthing is just a dull handsome Hollywood hunk that lacks the acting chops to command an inspiring speech. The rest of the, surprisingly British, support cast don't really get a chance to do much but die heroically or perhaps less so.

But somehow the film has it's charm, for a way to waste an hour or two in the afternoon !!

Solis (2018)

Burn It All !!

[4/10 · 29 March 2020]

Frustratingly slow low budget sci-fi movie that thinks it's probably building tension but instead becomes more and more annoying as every minute of inaction passes by.

I'm guessing they spent most of the budget on the soundtrack which to give it credit is the best part of the movie.

And what is about low budget movies that don't provide a satisfactory ending? It's like they purposefully don't want to conform to the Hollywood stereotype of a happy ever after because that would be compromising the 'artistic integrity'!! But the truth of the matter is I don't think they ever know how to end a movie.

An hour and half of build-up without a pay off sucks but honestly, I hope he didn't make it!!

John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)

More Blood & Bullets

[5/10 · 28 March 2020]

There's an audience for this type of movie I get it, high on violence and orchestrated fight scenes, low on storylines and character development.

But don't you all get bored of seeing the same 'hero' managing the impossible all on his own? By definition these type of movies have always been implausible but John Wick : Chapter 2 takes it to new heights with seemingly everybody on the planet taking up the side career of assassin for hire.

Keanu has never been what you would call the greatest of today's actors and with little dialogue to speak of this is lucky for him because despite the Greek tragedy of it all, high art this is not !! But I guess it never said it was !!

Last Ferry (2019)

Sinking Ship

[4/10 · 27 March 2020]

I think people are being way too generous with this low budget gay thriller.

Neither suspenseful or particularly dramatic - the storyline was unfulfilling, it's like we came in at the middle and stayed there - no idea the reason behind the murder in the first place coupled with an unresolved ending

The actors weren't super engrossing, merely playing off gay stereotypes for the most part, right down to the predatory older gay guy in the cafe at the beginning.

The ending is NOT open to interpretation, it's a COP OUT!! Don't start making a movie unless you know how it ends otherwise how can you let your characters develop.

Disappointing !

Jeepers Creepers III (2017)

No Jeepers, No Creepers !!

[3/10 · 21 March 2020]

I don' think I'll be able to add anything that hasn't already been said, I did not heed their warnings and give this a wide berth and for that I have only myself to blame.

A lazy hack job of a horror movie, with next to no story line, undefined characters to root for, no scares, no atmosphere and no tension. It was all very underwhelming.

Even the 'promise' of yet another sequel does not bode well for this franchise

Shutter Island (2010)

A movie to rewatch

[8/10 · 15 March 2020]

There's not many movies that are worth a second viewing but this is definitely up there.

One of DiCaprio's finest movies to date and is actually better when you re-watch it after knowing the plot twist. The subtle acting nuances from the supporting cast become that much clearer the second time around.

If you like good mystery psycho-drama's then this is a must, coupled with an atmospheric soundtrack and unusual cinematography this is a top 20 movie of the 2000's

Girl on the Third Floor (2019)

Improvement Show

[3/10 · 29 February 2020]

Odd, disjointed, nonsensical movie that expected the viewer to suspend their disbelief for an hour and half, well it was about 1 hour 25 minutes too long for that!

I could go into detail but what would be the point (you know I'm going to though, the pull here is too strong), a waste of energy for a script that goes no-where, not a scare in the whole film unless loud doorbells give you the creeps !!

Look, there's an old whorehouse/brothel where women who worked there went missing, presumed dead and no-one cared and here's Don many many years later come to turn his f@*ked up life around and renovate the crap out of this house- there's a story line that was vastly underused, if you can't make the horror aspect work, make it a paranormal mystery to solve (they didn't bother doing that).

What we have instead is C M Punk showing off his tats, being the cheating creep he was supposedly coming out to the suburbs to stop being and tearing down a lot of walls. We get a lot of marbles rolling around the house, a dog barking a lot (always take notice of the dog in a horror movie) and a handful of the oddest, superfluous 'supporting' characters to fill out the proceedings - they were literally of no help, the Pastor who just sat back drinking Bourbon without warning them despite knowing everything, the 'kindly' barman who could have at least fed them and in turn us with the history of the place and then the long suffering wife who quire frankly could have been up there as moral support for Don and lastly just so we don't make this movie the whitest of the white comes in black 'best friend' Milo who in good cliched spirit of things gets himself killed.

This movie needed a better writer and director - there could have been a solid movie here it just wasn't this plot holed ridden one !!

Polaroid (I) (2019)

Under-Developed

[3/10 · 28 February 2020]

There's nothing here that you haven't seen before in countless other teen horror movies, think Final Destination with an old camera but not as inventive with it's deaths. They tried to layer this mediocre, cliche ridden teen scare with needless twist, after twists with the identity of the killer. No real tension or sense of suspense but contained a few of those obligatory jump scares. Disappointing but at least it was short !

Eli (I) (2019)

Just Go Outside Instead !!

[4/10 · 22 February 2020]

Just because Eli doesn't think he can go outside doesn't mean you should waste an hour and half watching him suffer too! What begins as a seemingly pedestrian family drama battling against the odds of an unbeatable disease somehow turns into a moderately more interesting ghost story that climaxes by ditching everything that came before it to hit the viewer with a curve ball and then stops just as it might have got interesting. Ciaran Foy really needed to pick a lane and stick with it but instead the offering was a patchwork of genres where none got a chance to develop. Try it if you must but have a reliable movie back up for when it ends and you want to watch something more satisfying to end your evening.