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Road House (2024)
Emotionless, dizzying, pointless
Maybe Doug Liman was just going for an apt reflection of many of our lives right now for those who are just struggling to get by day-to-day (it is March 2024 as I write this), but his film falls flat on many levels (as described in my review title).
As a big fan of Jake Gyllenhaal and a fan of some of Liman's action work (Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Bourne Identity), I wanted to give this remake a chance.
First off, as a spectacle, like an MMA event: it is what it is, and it delivers with several fully-engaged fight sequences. I get that the camerawork was intended to get you right into the middle of the action (literally putting you between the fighter, and you feel the jolting punch after punch while rolling and dodging and yes...even being hit). But the overall effect is nauseating. I cannot imagine watching this in the theater with a 2-story sized screen.
Second, as a film, this just falls flat. (1) No characterization, even of its main character. (2) Dialogue and plot that is laughably senseless. (3) Deadpan, robotic acting.
(1) There is no intent to move the characters from points A & B. None of the characters. Gyllenhaal is wasted as the lead, whose Dalton is inaccessible to the viewer: other than escaping his past, there is nothing we learn about him, what he wants, where he's going, what he's even doing there in the course of the film. Daniela Melchior's Ellie transitions from an angry doctor to love interest with no progression. And, Billy Magnussen's main antagonist Brandt is a paper-thin character with questionable to no motivation.
(2) There simply isn't a story past a basic plot, a plot that any grade-schooler or high-schooler could have conjured as a writing assignment. Without any progressions from beginning to end, scenes--and characters--are just drifting aimlessly from scene to scene.
(3) As such, the actors are completed wasted, and they show that in their deadpan, robotic deliveries of terrible lines. Gyllenhaal delivers his lines without emotion, and maybe it's to convey that Dalton has no more emotions to share since he only has anger, but half the time his sentences are given as if he's about to laugh at them. As others have noted, Joaquim de Almeida--who's played many a questionable bad guy in his day--is wasted as the town sheriff.
If you want to watch an MMA fight, then go to the arenas or buy a few PPV events. Or, if you're a fan of McGregor, go follow his exploits on social media and tabloids. If you want to see a film with characters that you would either like or dislike, root for, root against, have a developed story from beginning to end...then this is not it.
As a fan of the original, as well as Gyllenhaal, I was sorely disappointed in this.
Salmon Fishing in the Yemen (2011)
A minor contemplative gem
It took me long enough to get to this film. On my list since it's premiere in 2011, and I've only gotten to it now. By now, both main actors have moved on to so many other projects and different career trajectories, it is so pleasing to see them in these roles: Ewan McGregor as Professor Alfred Jones and Emily Blunt as Harriet Chetwode-Talbot.
The story was musingly amusing. The tale of two people who are so different and yet find commonality in an incredibly odd and far-fetched project: populating salmon in Yemen for the sake of a sheikh's dreams; the sheikh played, in my mind, enjoyably refreshingly against stereotype by Amr Waked.
Though there were some plot elements which I didn't think fit so well, overall pace and character development in this somewhat short film (107 minutes) was good. I just wish there was more, though.
Overall, as the review title reads: this was a minor contemplative gem. About what we do with our lives, how we live them, and the difference a change of pace, environment, perspective can make.
Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)
What did you do?!?!
Why the producers, writers, director decided this was the best story for the Godzilla (2014) sequel, I will never understand.
By far, one of the biggest disappointments for a long-time Godzilla fan (Toho productions) and someone who also very much liked Gareth Edwards' 2014 film.
This one, despite the many Easter eggs paying homage to the Toho films and delighting long-time fans, fell absolutely flat. A plot that involved a family torn apart from 2014 only to have their drama take completely center stage in a global crisis. The terror and destruction unleashed upon the world in this film is overwhelming, and yet we are to believe that all the action revolves around this family, their daughter, and a bunch of scientists. The suspension of belief required is insurmountable.
The effects and renderings of monsters from the past give them renewed life and awe: Ghidorah, Rodan, Mothra, and Godzilla all are drawn menacingly well in this film. But the fight scenes, almost always in the dark and amidst fake shaky-camera footage cannot be excused. Why did they do this?
A big disappointment. Watch it when it comes to streaming, if only just to see the fight scenes and the creatures in their majesty. Definitely skip the disappointing story.
Columbus (2017)
Magical
Yes, magical. Magical if you are constantly contemplative and have always wondered about life...even as you hurdle through life...but wish we could all just slow down and talk about it. This is what this film was.
Sublime and subdued performances by John Cho and Haley Lu Richardson. Since Cho had only previously been in madcap lunacy or large production sci-fi and Richardson had been a relatively unknown, their performances as directed by Kogonada can be described as "breakthrough." The cinematography was equally paced, showcasing the architecture, look, feel of Columbus beautifully.
Well worth the time and effort to sit through. An amazing look at life, how we love, sacrifice, and just being. Highly recommended!
The Island (2005)
Second-rate story of something's been done before
I came upon this when listening to Jablonsky's soundtrack music, having completely forgotten this even existed.
As my review is titled, it is a second-rate production of a basic story that has been done better-much better-before. A male & female paring who discover that their utopia-like existence of dumbed-down inhabitants isn't what they've been fed and brought up to believe. Think Logan's Run but with a dumbed-down storyline, over simplified motivation from the main character. Paired with Michael Bay's signature frantic direction, it becomes almost unwatchable. You spend almost the entire movie trying desperately to follow the action as the camera pans around the scene and dashes after the main characters (played with "mail-it-in" lifelessness by Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson) seemingly run, and run, and run away throughout the film.
Unless you are a big fan of these actors, or even Sean Bean (as the villain) and Djimon Hounsou (as the conflicted not-so-menacing mercenary)-and even then there is very little material for these actors to work with-I would definitely skip it.
Suburbicon (2017)
Seemingly Senseless
Seemingly senseless. Or maybe that was the point. Even with unsavory and unlikeable characters, you wind up caring for them one way of the other. Not so with the primary characters of this film. And, with a character driven study of the evil of human nature, that's precisely what is necessary; and yet completely lacking in this George Clooney directed morass.
Matt Damon as the shady father and primary protagonist is the most unindentifiable he's ever been on screen. His motivation is hardly ever clear besides just going from scene to scene. Julianne Moore is wasted even though she plays two characters. Finally, the apparent initiator of all the drama in this town-the black family that moves in-is reduced to just a footnote. I really wanted to like this film. Was not meant to be. Go find your fix for dramatic cultural commentary elsewhere.