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Alfonse
Reviews
Supernatural (2005)
Best show on TV - Awesome!
I'm a big horror film fan and I have to say that every episode of this show has made me jump. The fact that out of 22 shows there's not a single dud in there is amazing. For those of you who haven't seen the any program yet, each episode is essentially based on an urban legend with two brothers hunting evil wherever it lurks. It's true that it's not terribly original, with nods to Carrie, I know what you did last summer, the Ring, Candyman, Jeepers Creepers... in fact almost every modern horror film you can think of. There's a decent amount of blood but it's mostly geared for shock value - and with the lights off and the tension mounting, there's certainly plenty of that! I'm really looking forward to Season 2 when it comes out and I only hope they don't run out of ideas. If you're a horror film buff, you really shouldn't be missing this, In a word - awesome!
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)
Sublime
You know a film like this is good when it goes on for over 3 hours and you still don't want it to end. I'm glad Peter Jackson won an Oscar for this film because it is, in my opinion, the finest film I've ever seen. People can wax lyrical about acting over special effects and gritty independent films but no-one has ever had the vision to put something together like this trilogy, and this final film in particular - it's simply stunning. I only hope and pray that someone gives Peter Jackson the money and facilities to make "The Hobbit" because any further addition to this series would be more than welcome. Warning: if you haven't seen the other two episodes in the trilogy, you will spoil the film experience of a lifetime by watching this first.
Cast Away (2000)
Load of rubbish
What are you people on about? This overblown federal express advert is NOT a good movie at all.
It is PANTS - if you want to watch Tom Hanks go mad on a desert island and skewer himself on various bits of scenery, be my guest. ...or go and watch the brilliant Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon instead
Robert and Tom - shame on you!
Grey Owl (1999)
A story worth telling
All in all a good film and better for the fact that had the film not been made the story might remain hidden to the masses. Brosnan does a good job as the native American with a hidden past and the photography is stunning. To some, this may be too whimsical, to others boring - for me it is a gentle, well-told tale and perfect for family viewing. Now that's not something you get a lot of recently.
Very Bad Things (1998)
Very good movie
The first thing that I'd like to say is that this film is very dark and may offend the more sensitive among us. It is not, however, a film about amoral psychos as some people seem to believe. It is in fact a film of two parts - firstly how a group of friends react to the accidental killing of a prostitute in a shocking fashion and secondly the tale of how one of their number turns out to be a sociopath intent on covering up the incident and their subsequent crimes by any means necessary. While politically correct viewers may reel in horror at the apparent lack of morals it is really only Christian Slater's character who commits any of the actual crimes and his friends simply follow him around too stunned to offer any resistance. Playing a character similar to his role in Heathers, Christian Slater is in his element with his smarmy humour and cheeky smile.
For fans of alternative humour and original plots this is a real treat
Con Air (1997)
Cliche-riddled mess
An utter waste of some fine actors. Seemingly a series of explosions, this is worse than some of the straight to video actioners that get panned as atrocious but display more life and originality than anything in this film. I went to see this at the cinema with a friend and I had to physically restrain him from going to the manager to ask for his money back.
An awful film with an unusually stilted performance from Cage - avoid it at all costs
The 13th Warrior (1999)
Braveheart meets the Magnificent Seven
After reading the novel by Michael Crichton I was surprised to hear that a film of the book was to be made (another Crichton book cash-in!!) given the nature of the story. The result is, however, a very enjoyable film full of epic battle scenes, old-style heroism and plenty of severed arms and flying heads. It's all very spectacular with hordes of heavily armed horsemen crashing through barricades and a suitably thrilling score to back it up - but my biggest problem is that although remaining faithful to the book, it doesn't really add anything, making the story appear a bit aimless and stilted. This is fine for the book, which is more of a diary of events but makes the film appear as more of a series of battle scenes rather than an involving tale. Despite this sentiment, I found the film to be thoroughly enjoyable and would urge anyone wanting a good adventure yarn to check this out. If you want a better viking flick, however, watch the Tony Curtis/Kirk Douglas effort, "The Vikings" made in 1958- its got a better story and is ultimately more rewarding!
The Crow: City of Angels (1996)
Worst sequel ever made
I was a big fan of the orignal "Crow" with its dark humour, superb music and effective cinematography. This, however, is dire! To put it short this is a dull, poorly acted remake of the original that should never have even been attempted. Watching this film spoiled my enjoyment of the original to some degree - a shame given that it was Brandon Lee's swansong.
The Quest (1996)
Just like the old days....
Yes this film is cheesy, yes the acting is quite poor but as a spectacle its top notch! I greatly enjoyed the earlier Van Damme films and have been disappointed by such rubbish as Streetfighter and Sudden Death....but this was a breath of fresh air. This has everything the old movies had, varied fighters, over-the-top moves, ridiculous stamina levels - in fact everything that made Van Damme a household star. This is never going to win any awards but for great entertainment this is hard to beat!
American Samurai (1992)
Liked "Bloodsport"? You'll love this!
Simultaneously the best and worst film of all time. More cheesy, cliche-ridden martial-arts mayhem and a very gory film indeed. If you enjoy this kind of film, however, you'll love it for what it is - mindless entertainment, worthy to be ranked with the Van Damme films of the eighties. It also marks the debut of new "Crow" Mark Dacascos. Superb fun - but not to be taken too seriously...