Everybody Hates Chris (TV Series)

Everybody Hates the Car (2009)

Chris Rock: Narrator

Quotes 

• Narrator : The cops got used to coming to my house more than O.J. and Nicole's.

• Rochelle : [to Chris]  Boy, this is not a library.

  Narrator : If it was, you'd be quiet.

• Narrator : The only person more excited about me getting a car was Greg.

  Greg Wuliger : Oh, man, this is awesome! This isn't like when you had your dad's car. This car's yours. We can go to the shore to get girls. We can drive into Manhattan to get girls. We can go to Coney Island to get girls.

  Chris : You do realize it's still gonna be us in the car, right?

  Greg Wuliger : It doesn't matter. Cars equal girls.

• Narrator : Sidekicks are always ready to go at a moment's notice. They're never aware of all the preparation the hero has to go through.

  [the scene cuts to a cowboy and indian] 

  Indian Sidekick : [to the cowboy]  Kemosabe, people in that town in big trouble. We go now.

  Masked Cowboy : Whoa, whoa. Slow down, my eager Indian friend. I need to get my guns, shine my boots, feed my horse, polish my spurs, get some bullets, light a fire, make some coffee, kiss a girl...

  Narrator : And round up the rest of the Village People.

• Chris : [to the police officer after his car is broken into]  So what I'll do now?

  Police Officer : Fill out this form and we'll see what we can do.

  Narrator : Which means, "Now that you've wasted my time, allow me to waste some of yours."