- Josh Lyman: Hi Senator, why don't you take your legislative agenda and shove it up your ass.
- Josh Lyman: [tossing phone to Donna] Turns out I was fine.
- Bonnie: [as Josh enters the bullpen, people applaud] Rambo!
- Josh Lyman: You talkin' to me?
- Bonnie: Nice phone call.
- Josh Lyman: That's how we do things in New England my friend!
- Bonnie: In Indiana, we're not allowed to talk like that.
- Ginger: In New Jersey, we encourage it
- Toby Ziegler: When you talk to the President, I want you talking about treatment; I want you talking about treatment versus enforcement, and I don't want you to stray from that.
- Sam Seaborn: Toby, is this what you meant when you said, Sam, you're completely in charge of this?
- Toby Ziegler: Yes, I meant that you're completely in charge of this in the sense that you're subordinate to me in every way.
- Toby Ziegler: [looking over Seaborn's shoulder while he's composing a document] Sam?
- Sam Seaborn: Yeah?
- Toby Ziegler: You're gonna come to a verb soon, right?
- Sam Seaborn: Okay, you know what this is?
- Toby Ziegler: Bad writing?
- Sam Seaborn: Imagery!
- Josh Lyman: I'd like to clear up that I don't have suits for days of the week. This is just a regular suit.
- Sam Seaborn: It's a nice suit.
- Donna Moss: Sure it's a nice suit, it's his Joey Lucas suit.
- Josh Lyman: Donna!
- Donna Moss: I'm beginning to regret not getting the waffles.
- Leo McGarry: I am beginning to regret having hired any of you! We have a 42% job approval and you're talking about waffles and something with Josh I don't understand.
- Donna Moss: He's wearing a special suit for Joey Lucas.
- Leo McGarry: You got dressed up for a guy named Joey?
- Toby Ziegler: I'm a responsible adult.
- Andrea Wyatt: I'm a member of the United States Congress.
- Toby Ziegler: I rest my case.
- Josh Lyman: You know what this is like? This is like The Godfather when Pacino tells James Caan that he's going to kill the cop. It's a lot like that scene only not really.
- Josh Lyman: I met her twice, Toby.
- Sam Seaborn: Yeah, but one of those times, she broke your heart.
- Josh Lyman: [blinks]
- Sam Seaborn: You know, the way women can do. The way they take your heart, they throw it on the floor, and then they stomp on it with their big high heels.
- Senate Majority Leader: [on Josh, after Bartlet announces his FEC nomminees] I'm gonna reach down his throat and take out his lungs with an ice cream scoop!