Jackie Chan Adventures (TV Series)

The Dark Hand (2000)

James Sie: Jackie Chan, Shendu the Fire Demon, Chow

Quotes 

• Uncle : Come, give Uncle a hug.

  [Jackie approaches Uncle, only to be whacked] 

  Jackie : Ow!

  Uncle : You forget to make coffee this morning! Coffee is the only thing keeping Uncle's ancient heart beating! You want dead Uncle?

• [repeated line] 

  Jackie : Bad Day! Bad Day! Bad Day!

• Jackie : Jade, these are my friends.

  Jade : Your friends knocked you out and took you to their secret underground base?

  Jackie : Uhm... yes.

  Jade : America is *so* cool!

• Jackie : Snowboarding works much better with snow.

• Uncle : One more thing, this is Jade, your niece. She will be living with you for a year, okay?

  Jackie : Okay. I have a niece?

  Uncle : Your cousin Shin's girl from Hong Kong. Jade is not behaving well there. Doing poorly in school. Your cousin thinks she will do better in America with you.

  Jackie : Uh, nobody asked me!

  Uncle : Did not want to bother you.

• Jackie : Where have you been? I don't hear from you for 6 years. Boom! You're in San Francisco saving my butt. Whoa. Those thugs must've knocked me out.

  Captain Black : Actually, I knocked you out.

• Captain Black : I'm sorry but this location must remain secret.

  Jackie : Oh yes. I can see this is very special garbage.

  Captain Black : Jackie...

  Jackie : May I'll see you in another 6 years. Excuse me while I call a cab.

  [Enters phone booth] 

  Captain Black : Uh Jackie

• Shendu The Fire Demon : While Tohru impresses, Valmont. Perhaps he should be aided by... the Shadowkhan.

  Valmont : As you wish, Shendu.

• Captain Black : With this new development, Section 13 could use an archeologist expert such as yourself.

  Jackie : Oh, I'm really just an amateur.

  Captain Black : A wise and talented amateur, whom I know and trust.

  Jackie : But my university work...

  Captain Black : It wouldn't be full time, Jackie, research only. To help us stay one step ahead of Valmont.

  Jackie : I will consider it.

• Jade : [Riding a motorbike in Section 13]  Jackie!

  Captain Black : Who is that?

  Jackie : No relation.

• Captain Black : [Jackie's dazed]  Jackie, how many fingers do you see?

  Jackie : Look, fishies.

• Captain Black : [to his men]  Care to explain how our security was penetrated by a child?

  Jade : I'm not a child. I'm Jackie's niece.

  Captain Black : Didn't know you had a niece, Jackie.

  Jackie : Join the club.

• Jackie : Stay here or I'll put you on the first flight back to Hong Kong.

  Jade : Scouts honor.

  [Jackie leaves] 

  Jade : Tch. Like I'm a scout.