The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones: Travels with Father (1996 TV Movie)
Michael Gough: Leo Tolstoy
Quotes
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Leo Tolstoy : You reeking little swine, how dare you shoot me in the ass!
Indiana Jones : I thought you were a giant weazle.
Leo Tolstoy : Do I look like a giant weazle? Is it my twitching snout? My long, hairless tail? Are all little English boys as stupid as you?
Indiana Jones : I'm not English, I'm American.
Leo Tolstoy : That explains it.
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Indiana Jones : You have dogs? So do I. One I mean, her name's Indiana. I haven't seen her in over a year, though. 'Cause we've been traveling so much.
Leo Tolstoy : You miss her?
Indiana Jones : Yeah, you bet I do. Can't wait to see her when we get home. Wonder if she'll still remember me.
Leo Tolstoy : Of course she will. Dogs are better than people.
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Leo Tolstoy : How dare you make me feel guilty!
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Indiana Jones : Hey, they were calling you Tolstoy. I think my father has some of your books. Didn't you write that eh, that really big fat one about war?
Leo Tolstoy : And peace.
Indiana Jones : No kiddin'. My father thinks you're great!
Leo Tolstoy : Your dad's an imbicile.
Indiana Jones : He's usually not wrong about this stuff. You should ask him.
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Leo Tolstoy : Do not try to see God through spectacles borrowed from the church. See God through your own eyes.